Itchy Itchy

Itchy itchy,
scratchy scratchy,
the consequences of stepping on a wasp.
Ouchie ouchie,
it hurts so much,
dad, please remove its sting!
My foot is swollen,
it hurts like hell,
I have to use crutches
and my skin is red.
The more I scratch,
the more it itches,
the more it hurts,
oh damn you wasp, to hell!


Author notes

This was quickly composed, inspired by my swollen foot. I kind of chose the ‘Animals’ option: wasps are animals, you know! Anyway, I wrote this because guess what: I stepped on a wasp yesterday. It hurt so much, I just wanted to punch the little insect in the face, grab it by the throat and say things that would be bleeped in Jerry Springer. Unfortunately, he died. (The insect, not Jerry Springer.)
So after that, my foot hurts pretty much, and I can't walk properly. Then at night, I can't sleep, because it's ITCHING! Can you BELIEVE how annoyed I am? Can you?! My foot is swollen! Swollen! And red! And today I had to use my old crutches.
I am good at self pitying. Heh heh.

“Taylor is my sexy ballerina.”

A contest entry

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Comments


  • Yi Yin
    August 2, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    oh shoosh!
    Really enjoyed reading it,., and I'm sorry i was laughing at the pain... this poem was beautifully amusing. Good job!

    Ps. Damn wasps! Damn anything that stings!


  • Taylor Renee
    July 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    lol!!
    This was hilarious. I'm sorry, it probably isn't suppost to be, haha, and it probably sux for you, but I found the whole thing really, really funny.
    The poem was written actually well, but the topic was like HA!
    Oh damn you wasp, to hell! That was so funny.
    You followed all the rules, lol.
    That must stink. I've never been stung by a bee before. or a wasp.
    ...Ha. Self pity is great.
    The author's notes were hilarious. "I stepped on a wasp yesterday. It hurt so much, I just wanted to punch the little insect in the face, grab it by the throat and say things that would be bleeped in Jerry Springer. Unfortunately, he died. (The insect, not Jerry Springer.)"
    I laughed so hard at that I literally fell out of my chair. Brilliant.
    I loved this. Nuff said.
    Thank you so much for entering, good luck, good job, and I hope your foot feels better soon!!!
    xoxo
    Tay

    • VocifVehem
      July 23, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      This is the second time I was stung. Except last time it was a bee, and it was mad at me. (Long story, not my fault.) That bee was out for vengeance. This wasp was just an accident! I didn't see it. (I felt it nontheless.)
      And, no worries, I hope it was funny, that was half the idea. I really am pissed though, at that little wasp! Stupid wasp. My foot is purple today! But hurts less. And itches more. (So I scratch and then it hurts more.) Thank you anyway, it was fun entering; I probably wouldn't have written anything for a while if I hadn't. And I love writing, no matter what it is. I even enjoy writing this, right now. I really have missed writing, because I haven't since the end of May/beginning of June.
      Anyshoe, I can't think of anything else to say, except your comment cheered me up a bit and made me forget about my purple foot for a minute. Thank you!