The Thomas'unattended bonfire burned furiously out of control late Saturday night at their backyard barbeque destroying three back yards and forcing forty-five people into the streets.
A contest entry
- Nano Stories by Embitter.
175 points, ended July 2, 2007, 30 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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That's such an awesome concept for a situation. And it's so realistic! A person's house is MUCH more likely to burn down from mundane shit like this, rather than something dramatic like arson or lightning strikes or something.
I think you need a comma between "barbeque" and "destroying," but that's a minor criticism.
This is a really great sentence. Very interesting situation. Great job. -
wow. That would so suck.
I liked this. I think its a petty cool story for the contest
Good luck !!!
xoxo
Tay -
Wow. That's a mouthful. You really did write a whole story there... the only thing is that it just didn't flow very well
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