I used to look up to you1
Now i cant even look at you at all2
You used to me my sister3
But now your just a doll.4
You are controlled by them5
Sister why cant you see?6
You used to be your own person7
By this let yourself be.8
One day you'll wake up9
Wake up from their spell10
And then you'll see your reflection11
Burning in hell...12
Author notes
I chose choice four by the way 
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
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Awesome poem, i really like it. I like how you said you used to look up to her and then said she's under there spell. Excellent write. and one day she will wake up from the spell
talk to u soon lots of love...
xXx sian xXx -
I really liked this like Sai said i like the bit about the doll, very clever! You're improving from amazing to more amazing, keep writing, don't ever give it up! xXx
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This was a good piece. I really liked how you kind of gave a full 'view' of this situation; from before, how things used to be, and then how they are now, and even a foreshadowing of how you predict things will be in the future. One thing to mention: "But now your just a doll." You'd actually want "you're" there, because it's saying "now you are just a doll", see? Anyways, I liked the strength behind this write, and the rhyming was well done, too. Thanks for the entry, and good luck in my contest.
Renae.
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