I've written many poems that,
For some they seem the same.
I try to change the meaning,
Only most end up in shame.
I figured I'd try something new,
For those who could complain.
Although I fear this won't suffice.
To me there is no gain.
Some people ask me why I write.
Is there some inspiration?
I honestly cannot say so.
There isn't much relation.
It's more or less a product of,
The thoughts and feelings had.
If my troubles count then sure,
My inspiration's sad.
I hope this poem's better,
Now I've given it some thought.
I've tried to stray away from usual,
Problems that were fought.
It's hard for me write like this.
It's not something that's taught.
Most poems on this site I post
are written in distraught.
I usually slip into a slight depressed infatuation,
With death, and blood, and knives, and flood,
Of tears and desolation.
It's something that I'm leaving.
For this moment I will try,
To stay away from heartache,
And the things that make me cry.
But now I think it's time,
For this pathetic poem to end.
I've tried my best, as you can see,
I mightn't be laughing, but that's just me.
Unless it's all pretend.
It really isn't something that I am good at
My friend,
And hopefully in the future,
This silly path will wend,
And then just maybe I'll write something
Happier.
Author notes
This is dedicated to "Zoldor".
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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i like it... absolutely perfect!
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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the poem was absolutely perfect!
beginning: 5, language: 4, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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I like the honestly of this poem. You lose the rhyming scheme a little ways down but it corrects itself. A little editing can fix that though. I also like the way you end it with hope. Good piece, good flow. Well done.
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the last stanza was all messed up. u should consider revising that. other than that i stil thought this was wonderful. gj.
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I found this very interesting in a funny sort of way. You did well, in my opinion I couldn't write something about nothing such as this. You've got talent.
x Julez -
tee hee. it's kinda humorous. it's also good. and your stuff isn't repetitive (that much) and your writing style is more fun than most people's. and you didn't make any grammatical errors, which is always a plus. =D
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I think this a very good poem, I liked it very much, it really speaks deep to me. Not the not happy part, but the struggling for the changing the writing style or at least writing something that is new.
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nice
i like this one, not all doom & gloom ^.^
you will write something happier, i know it, someday ; ) -
I liked this one ^_^
The last part didn't flow very easily, though.
It's amazing how you can make it rhyme like that, I can't rhyme for crap x.x
Very good, keep writing!
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Hmm. Well, overall, it's very good. But the rhythm could use some work. Especially for "Most of my poetry // is written in distraught." and the last two stanzas. But yay! A poem that isn't exactly like every other thing you have on this site! XD <333
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