I have a very strong feeling, that opposite of love is not Hate, It’s Apathy. It’s not giving a damn,

Songs about you!1

“Aubrey why are you being so difficult?” He asked2

“Oh I’m being difficult, Oh honey I’m being anything but difficult. HOW hard is it to understand that I wanted to be with you. How hard is it that I saw you FOR YOU. And that I didn’t buy into that player crap you pull.” She replied harshly3

“You’re saying all these things I can’t understand about you.” He exclaimed as he massaged his sinuses4

“Austin that’s how life is. Life is meant to be lived in forwards but its best understood backwards!” She yelled5

“See there you go again with the poetic whatever you want to call it crap.” He complained.6

Silence came across the room. He stared at her with evil in his eyes. She burned her eyes into his soul with Anger and heartbreak. It was just a few years in the making now, the two were locked in a heated dispute, cause he left when she needed him the most. 7

She looked at him in the eye one last time, and he glanced at her, making those hazel sparkle with tints of green glitter. Just the way she liked it. Her anger flushed out of her body faster than water would go down the toilet drain. 8

“You know what I’m done. You can go. We don’t have anymore business as friends anymore.” She said.9

“Aubrey!” He called out. She ran to the front door and opened it, showing him the way out. 10

“Don’t Aubrey me, I told you. I’m done.”11

“No we’re not done. And we won’t be until I get some answers.” He argued.12

“You want answers Austin, how about you look into my eyes and see how HURT I am by you. You say you were the sweetest guy in the world, and that you would hurt yourself before you would ever hurt a girl, but look you’ve hurt me more than enough times and you don’t even do a damn thing about it.” She snapped.13

“Aubrey just tell me what you want me to do and I’ll do it because ITS FOR YOU.” He shot back.14

“Stop being so damn arrogant.” She hissed.15

“And just how am I supposed to do that?” He replied 16

“Well maybe you should go find your slut, she turned you into the son of the bitch that you are. Maybe she can turn you back.”17

“Now that’s not fair.” He exclaimed18

“Oh and like what you did to me was fair?” She yelled. He looked down at the floor in shame.19

“For a year I kept telling you how I felt about you. And although I did keep it in for some time I did manage to tell you.” She cried.20

“I can’t remember one time you told me how you really felt.” He muttered.21

“This is why I can’t believe I wasted my time ON YOU.” She sniffled.22

“Aubrey.” He said trying to calm her down.23

“September 30th, you and I talked for hours on the phone about you and me. June 8th, you me and Adrianna were on the phone and I told you then too. I told you I wanted nothing but to be with you. And you know what you said, we don’t have a physical attraction, but we have a mental attraction. Well baby wake up, cause mental trumps physical.” She snapped24

“You also told me that summer night underneath the stars at the lake this year.” 25

“I thought you didn’t remember.” She said softly26

“People can lie.” He said looking into her eyes.27

“Get out I can’t stand to see your lying ass any longer. I’m not wasting anymore time on you.” She pushed him out the door and slammed it in his face. Once he got home he turned on the computer and went straight to youtube. 28

“Maybe she’s posted something else on youtube.” He thought. 29

He typed in x0_Aubreylicious_x0 in users search and immediately found her. 30

“What a cute picture.” He thought again. He scrolled to the bottom of the page for her newest webcam post. December 22nd, 2006. Songs about love it was titled. He clicked the hyperlink and was quickly taken to the video. There she was sitting at her computer all gracefully with her right leg across her left leg in a triangle style.31

“I have a very strong feeling, that opposite of love is not Hate, It’s Apathy. It’s not giving a damn, especially not giving a damn about someone who thought the world of you. So if you’ve been watching my recent rantings, I love this boy. His name is Austin McCain (just in case you all are just tuning in). If any of you know him. You know he has this image of a player. He portrays the image of never being faithful to anyone, well let me tell you I was the only girl he was ever faithful to, and you know what no matter how many times he got into fights with his other ex girlfriends or broke up with them he always cheated on them. 32

Obviously you know me, Aubrey CHanning you really know me you know I can speak in riddles sometimes, but I’m also very trustworthy. Just because I said Austin has the image of a player, it doesn’t mean I think of him that way. And yes he does cheat, and I know a lot of people can say “once a cheater always a cheater.” Well with some guys I believe that, but not with Austin. But remember you have to hear two sides, and not all the time can the second side come from the victim, or villain. As I’ve said I was the only girl he was ever faithful to, but I was the girl he did cheat on with his girlfriend.33

Okay so that’s a bunch of confusing rubbish, but what I’m trying to say is he chose me over the slut he was dating. And you know what that could have been the best month of my life. I loved every minute of it even though I gave into temptation. So to clear up some minds I did talk about him and I dating in which I was the only girl he was ever faithful to, and then I said he cheated on his girlfriend with me. Just a reminder, when we were together for real it was almost a year before the temptation time. But other than that, your probably hearing the soft music I’m talking over. It’s Mariah carey’s “always be my Baby” and yes this song is dedicated to Austin. In a weird way it describe me and him, because you know what I waited for him, after him and I broke up. I didn’t ask him to come back right away after we broke up because I knew he needed time to recover from the pain I caused. I also needed time to recover. But you know what our love didn’t die. I found myself in love with him, and I completely opened up to him. But only did I find that out until after he told me he gave his heart to me (which was probably a lie but whatever moving on) and I broke up with him. 34

It says here, that I won’t beg you to stay, if you’re determined to leave, boy I will not stand in your way but inevitably you’ll be back again. And that’s the true part of this song cause he did come back. Several times, although we were never TOGETHER together. 35

Before I quit my yammering and let you listen to the songs and to those old guys and maybe some young hot horny ones who want to watch me do absolutely nothing, and jack off, these songs aren’t my ordinary rock songs I listen to, this is a special set. A set of love songs I set aside for that special someone who apparently I’m too good for. Enjoy.” Aubrey podcasted. She pressed play on her ipod and “What if” By Kate winslet started playing. 36

Aubrey’s playlist for tonight37

1) Kate Winslet – what if.38

2) Mary J Blige – Be without you39

3) Nickelback – Far Away40

4) Hinder – Lips of an Angel41

5) Usher – You got it bad42

6) Anastasia Soundtrack – Life is a road43

7) O-town – I showed her44

8) One Voice – Always on my mind45

9) Paula Deanda – When it was me46

10) The way – Clay Aiken47

11) Rascal Flatts – He ain’t the leavin kind48

12) Usher f/ Alicia keyes – My boo49

13) Peabo Bryson – If you’re ever in my arms again50

14) Vanessa Williams – Save the best for last51

15) Mariah Carey – We belong together52

16) This day and age – Second place victory53

17) Tiffany – Could’ve been54

18) Nb Ridaz –Notice me55

19) John Michael Montgomery – I can love you like that56

20) Selena – Dreaming of you57

Austin listened to the entire webcast. Without her knowing it she let him in even more. And Somehow he understood what she’s been saying all along, but it was too late. December 22nd, was the very last day Aubrey would waste another one of her precious tears on an ass like Austin. After December 22nd, Austin would never be the same because the very next time he would see the girl that loved him she would be in the arms of someone else who loved her just as much as she loved him. 58