Thorn of the rose chapter 1

"The only way you'll be able to get away is through death. And even then, you will still belong to me." Alexander has said plenty of times, this was no surprise to me.

His words haunted me everyday. I can't even remember the last time he said those three words-I love you. Over a long period of time, the days began to fill up with everything we didn't say to each other. It has gotten to the point where I am unhappy living with him. He lives unhappily ever after with me but refuses to let me go.

The night mares came frequently of those twenty-two words. I haven't been able to understand how he can treat me like this. I gave up everything for him when we got married. I put a halt on my modeling career and let my marriage become my full time career instead. I sold my penthouse duplex for $5.7 million,, which had views of the Hudson River and New York City's Skyline. It was the first place I bought on my own. Everything I had to my name I sold. I thought it was for the better. Oh how wrong I was.

For our one-year anniversary, Alex bought me a black BMW X5. On every Friday, Alex would come home with giftbags from every jewelry store imaginable: Tiffany's, Jacob and Company, Sol Rafael, Lorraine Schwartz, Harry Winston... The list went on. My jewelry box gave Lucky Charms a run for their money. Everything I wanted or needed, he gave me. I wanted a house in South Hampton and he bought it for me - four million dollars paid in full.

I never questioned what he did for a living, until recently I discovered that he was associated with powerful organized crime figures of the Italian and Russian Mafia. At times, thinking about that - it scared me. But what scares me the most is his violent and erratic behavior. It has been times when I wanted to dissolve this marriage but couldn't because I loved him too much. He once was the man of my dreams: Tall, dark, handsome, Suave, and really good in bed. Once we said 'I do,' he became the man of my nightmares. The verbal and physical abuse became too much for me to handle, but somehow I found away to hide the black eyes and bruises from friends and family.

"You have to be an adult and deal with it! That is something you have go through when you're married. So suck it up! He's a millionaire for Christ sakes!" My mother Guilana, always said to me on more than one occasion. I always wondered how she would react when she found out her only daughter had been murdered and she did nothing to stop it or prevent it from happening. She'll end up regretting it one of these days.

I was standing outside on the terrace, sipping on a glass of Vanilla Grey Goose. Placing the glass on the table, I glanced down at the traffic from the 40th floor - thinking death was not a bad idea. I was contemplating of whether or not to jump. I picked up my glass, held it over the rail and watched it fall. I closed my eyes, imagining it was me that was falling through the air. My heart was racing and beating faster than normal.

Out of nowhere, hands emerged - pulling me off of the balcony and into the apartment. Inside the living room, Alex cornered me against the wal. I could smell beer on his breath. Using the palm and back of his hand, he slapped my face. I tried to block his blows but it didnt help; it only made him angrier. I had no energy to fight back and the sad part was, I was letting him hit me. The pain was welcoming; each blow made my face sting, but soon it would be over. I tried to run, but he shoved me against the wall. He kept yelling profanity at me but I blocked it out. At that minute, I no longer wanteed to die or be depressed, I just wanted to leave him. This marriage was doomed from the start.

'I can't live like this anymore and I won't' I had made up my mind, somehow some way I was going to get out. When he finished beating the shit out of me, he grabbed his coat and stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door so hard it shook our entire apartment level. Once his heavy footsteps faded, I got off the floor and paced around our home thinking of what I could do. Tears streamed down my face as I put my head in my hands and gazed at the lovely portrait of us on our wedding day. I picked it up and ran my hand over the thin glass that prevented damage to the picture; anger rushed over me and I threw the picture and pictureframe against the wall watching it shatter into a million pieces. "I hope you cut your foot and die!" I murmured underneath my breath.

The Movado clock struck ten and the fatigue from today's events came over me. I turned out all the lights and made my way to the master bedroom alone. Stripping down to my Victoria's Secret lingerie, I crawled between the covers, laying on the left side of my body. As I laid there, staring at a beautiful painting of the perfect get away. Oh how I wish I was there right now.

Alex didn't come home until 2 A.M. I was still looking out of the window. He came into the bedroom, took off his clothes, except for his Calvin Klein boxers and climbed into bed. He reeked of COOL WATER - a perfume I don't even wear. I pretended to be asleep as I laid there. I knew what I was going to do know. I felt his back against mine and shifted my body so I wouldn't feel him touching me - Hoping that he would drift off to sleep soon.

Five minutes or so had passed, his body shifted and his arm was now wrapped around my stomach. I didn't hesitate before before shoving his arm back. I got out of bed and went into the bathroom. I looked at the woman in the mirror and did not like what I saw. A woman that used to have a full heart of happiness, now had a heart full of sadness. Many people I look like a mix of Jessica Alba and Angelina Jolie, not a bad combo if you ask me. In the mirror I saw a woman that was too damn beautiful, inside and out, and too smart to be with a psychotic ass of a man like Alex

I left the bathroom, walked over to the arm chair beside the window and unplugged my cell phone from the charger. When it beeped I was scared that it may have disturbed Alex. It didn't - thank god!I slid the sliding glass door open and went out onto the terrace. I called my best friend Gabrielle, but I got her voicemail. I told her to call me as soon as she got the message, and that it was about Alex.

I turned around to go back inside and was shocked to see Alex standing in front of me.

"Come back to bed." He ordered.

I walked passed him and crawled into bed, while he crawled on top of me and began kissing my neck working his way up to my lips. I didn't want to make love to him. The sex was great - only when he wasn't forcing me.

"Alex, Get off of me now!" I pushed him away. Seeing that I wasn't in the mood, he rolled over to his side of the bed.

"Don't worry babe. If you won't give me what I need, I have plenty of others who will." He said.

"I am not worried Alex. But you on the other hand should be. Don't ever think that what you do won't come back to haunt your scrawny little ass." I hissed. "And trust me whatever I need, there's others who could fulfill all my needs and wants, and appreciate me more than you ever have."

Silence fell over the atmosphere. He finally accepted the fact he wouldn't win this one. This tiem, I went to sleep feeling powerful and hoping sunrise would arrive more quickly.

The sounds of Ale moving around doing his morning routine woke me up, but it was music to my ears. The water bashing against the glass shower, the buzzing of his electric razor, then the low humming from his Oral-B toothbrush. The next thing I knew he would do is get dressed in his usual black pants and blue buttoned up shirt and leave his dirty, old boxers laying anywhere on the bathroom floor. He came out of the bathroom all clean and shaved and dressed. He picked up his breifcase, stuffed a folder that had "CONFIDENTIAL" written on it, in his case and left without saying a word. Usually he would have kissed me goodbye but not this time. I'm glad he didn't, it's not like I missed him or his kisses.

My signal to follow through with my plan came when I heard the apartment door slammed shut. I threw the covers off of me and eyed the clock which blinked seven-thirty. Alex wouldn't be home until seven, to say the least. Which gave me enough time to run all my personal errands. I hurried into the bathroom and turned the water on in the shower, letting it warm up while I plugged in my flat iron. It only took me a few seconds to strip down, get in the shower, and lather my body with Dove. I heard the home phone ring but I chose to ignore it. My cell phone started ringing net. Stepping out of the shower, I dried off and wrapped the towel around my naked body. I went into the bedroom and checked the caller ID on both phones - both calls from Alex. I snatched the phone line from out of the wall. Alex hated when he couldn't reach me. I finished drying off my body, brushed my teeth, and cleaned my face with Proactiv. I put on a La Perla bra with matching knickers, which Alex bought me last week as an apology. Well I'll tell you one thing, His shitty apology gifts and 'I'm sorry's', they don't cut it for me anymore. I ripped the bra and underwear off my body and threw it into the trash. I opted to wear the Dolce & Gabbana set I recently bought. I went back into the bathroom, straightened my hair, pulled out my Louis Vuitton cosmetic bag from underneath the sink and packed all of my toiletries into it and packed the rest of my belongings into the matching overnight bag. I tossed the overnight duffle bag onto the bed as I made my way to my side of the walk in closet. I slipped into a pair of Versace jeans with a white Versace buttoned up blouse. I stepped into my silver, Versace, 4-inch stilleto heels and topped my outfit off with an oversized pair of Versace sunglasses. They don't call me Glamorous for nothing!

All ten pieces of my Louis Vuitton luggage set were now spread across the floor. I pulled every piece of clothing off the hangers, folding and shoving all shirts, pants, and dresses into my suitcase. My two Chanel overnight bags were reserved for all 40 pairs of my designer shoes. I dragged all ten bags to the living room and left them by the front door. I skipped back into the bedroom took down the picture that concealed Alex's safe and entered the six digit code. 122404 - our wedding date how convient. The door popped open and stacks of cash lined up the walls of the safe. There was a smaller box in front of the cash that caught my eye. I opened it and was in Heaven when I saw what was inside. My passport, license, and spare keys that Alex too from me were in there all along. Alex had take all of it from me so I couldn't go anywhere. And for the past month, I have been in this apartment as if I were in prison.

He called my agent, publicist, entertainment lawyer and manager behind my back and told them I was retiring. I found out a few days later when they called to tell me that they didn't approve of my decision to leave the entertainment industry so abruptly. I confronted Alex and he gave me an ultimatum. I either lose him and all my money if I continue modeling, or I retire and I get to keep my money. I quit my dreams for a short period of time; being discreet, I kept in constant contact with my agent and manager. My PR team continued to get me work. When Alex was out of town, I worked my ass off to make all the money I could within the short time frame.

A few weeks ago, he put a block on the phone when he found out about my secret dealings with work. Once I leave him today, I am going back to work FULL TIME. I grabbed on of his Gucci duffle bags from the closet and filled it with all the money and important document envelopes that could fit in the bag. I locked the safe, placed the picture back on the wall and set the money bag on the bed. I opened my top dresser drawer and pulled out a lock box with "CHANEL" inscribed on the lid. This box contained my bank cards, credit cards, spare keys and other important documents that were needed in case of an emergency. This was definitely a HUGE emergency.

Everything was lined up at the door, I stacked my smaller bags on top of my larger suitcases, and threw my shoulder bags onto my shoulders. Before leaving I made sure the coast was as clear as glass. I took the elevator down to the garage and walked over to my BMW when the doors opened. It had been in the same position for the last two months and had collected a great deal of dust. I disarmed the alarm and sat behind the wheel. Sticking the key into the ignition, I turned it to the right to start, but the engine would not turn over. All the lights flicked on. I noticed that my gas was on the verge of hitting empty and my 'check engine' light was on. I was supposed to get my oill chaned about two months ago so its no surprise that my car is actin this way. It also wouldn't surprise me if the fucker of a husband I married did something to it in order to keep me from going anywhere.

"Please don't do this to me. Not now." I said aloud to the car, as if it were to respond. I kept turning the key and stepping on the gas as the car turned over after my fifth attempt. I decided to let the car run while I went back up to the apartment for my purse and the bag of money.

On my way to the nearest gas station, I caled Douglas Elliman Real Estate offive and spoke with New York's top realtor, Dolly Lenz. She told me to come by her office and we'd figure out together what to do about my situation. After leaving the gas station I drove down to the Bank of America and opened a safety deposit box a new safety deposit box to store the documents in. Although it was five after ten, I was nervous. If Alex caught me in the act, I don't know what would happen. I signed in to have a bank representative help me and waited in the cozy area for ten minutes until my name was called. I went into the woman's office with my bank cards in hand.

"Hi miss Xanatos, How nice to see you." The woman grinned as if she knew something I didn't.

"What can I help you with?" She asked, sitting behind an Oak desk cluttered with papers. How professional.

"To be honest, I don't have much time. I want to open a new checking account but before I do that I need to know the balance in these two accounts so I know how much to transfer." I replied handing her the first card; mine and Alex's joint checking account. She typed in the sixteen digit checking account number into her computer. I began playing with my emerald square cut diamond ring while I waited.

"Oh DEAR.... I have some bad news." She said clicking her mouse.

"What kind of bad news." I leaned over the desk to look at the screen. This was not a perfect time for bad news.

"This account has been frozen by Mister Xanatos."

"What do you mean frozen? He can't do that!" I screamed, which took her by surprise. Other employees came into the office to see if everything was alright and left immediately when the woman gave them a signal.

"He had the account setup his name." She explained.

"That lying SON OF A BITCH! The last time I checked BOTH of our names were on the account. I'm his WIFE!" I went into a panic. She told me that there was a balance of $125,000 when it was frozen. That is a far cry from the $600,000 that was in it last week when I checked the balance online.

"Check the savings account. I don't care how much he has in it. I want it all! He's fucking with the WRONG woman now!" I had all two million dollars that was secured in our joint savings account transferred into my own personal account. I signed all the necessary paperwork and left when everything was done.

It took me an hour to get to Dolly's office. Bumper to bumper traffic, As always. For four hours we looked at the most immaculate properties in Manhattan. I had lost track of time and was in the process of filling out a twenty-nine thousand dollar a month lease for a tweo bedroom, two and a half bathroom apartment in the Trump World Tower. Alex's number appeared on my cell but I hit decline. The clock struck five o'clock when I left Dolly's office and made my way back home to finish what I had started. I didn't see Alex's car in the garage.

"Phew!" I let out a huge sigh and wiped the cold sweat off of my brow. I double parked my car and went up to the apartment to grab my plug in charger I accidentally forgot. I went into the bedroom and pulled the charger out from the wall socket. I scanned the bedroom making sure I didn't leave anything important, when I heared the lock on the apartment door turn.

"SHIT!" I began to panic. Alex entered the apartment, looked at me square in the eye and then looked at the keys I was holding. He slammed the door and bolt-locked it.

"LEANDRA!" He screamed throwing his breif case across the room and making it hit the glass sliding door. the glass shattered and scattered everywhere. Oh boy was I scared. I tried my best to keep my composure but when you're in my situation keeping your composure is the farthest thing from your mind. I locked the bedroom door. and hid in the corner that my side of the bed faced. I tried calling the police on my cell phone but it died on the last call I made. Alex kicked the door in and splinters went everywhere on the carpet. I doubt a person could get through this place without getting their feet hurt.

"Going somewhere?" He asked angrily. "You think you're going to leave me!" I dashed for the bathroom but he grabbed my arm and put his arms around me, gripping me tightly to the point it became harder to breath. He pinned me down on the bed and began to slap me. I kicked him repeatedly. He pinned me down harder and began to choke me. He let go and unbuckled his pants. I tried to get away, but his strong grip held me down. I screamed, he slapped me across my face to shut me up. He pulled down my jeans and was about to go further but the banging on the door caused him to stop.

"POLICE! Open up!"

Alex zipped his pants and exited the bedroom. Pain ripped through my face. I got off the bed, pulled my pants up, retrieved my dead cell phone and entered the living room. Alex was trying to make the atmosphere seem happ and he was doing an impeccable job. Alex opened the door and asked the two officers what they wanted.

"We got a call from a number that led to this apartment, what is going on here?" One of the two officers said as he stepped into the apartment. He and his partner eyed the scene of the broken doors.

"I'm sorry, you have the wrong apartment. I think my wife's cell phone was stolen and probably someone prank called you." Alex lied.

"Sir, we know we have the right apartment, our phone tracker led us right here." The dominant officer explained.

"What is with the mess sir?" The female officer asked.

"Oh we were just have some amazing, tantric sex." Alex replied as his eyes glazed over in the thought of sex. I stayed in the door way of the bedroom trying to stay subtle in the scene. It worked until the policewoman walked over to me and gazed at my frail body.

"You called us didn't you?" She asked. I nodded and folded my arms against my chest. Alex immediately interrupted the policewoman's thoughts.

"She's lying!"

I tried hard to keep from choking on my tears but I managed to choke out that I just wanted to leave my husband. I couldn't stand this abuse anymore.

"Come with us miss." The policeman stated. He looped his arm around me and the police woman guarded my back.

"REMEMBER, You will always belong to me!" He whispered in my ear. I snatched my arm away and slapped him across the face with the back of my hand. Something I had never done ntil now and it felt damn good. My broke his skin but did not draw any blood. I took off my wedding ring and threw it, making sure it hit his broad chest.

"You'll be sorry." Were his last words as I slammed the door behind me. The police officers escorted me down to the garage. One of the valets pulled my car around. I popped the trunk to make sure all of my luggage was still there. Content that it was all there, I tipped the police officers and the valet one hundred bucks each for their services. I got into the car and shut the door once the police exited the garage. I revved up the engine and drove out of the garage. I took off my sunglasses - there was no use for them anyways. My windows are tinted, so I don't have to worry about being seen.

The only thing on my mind right was where I would go from here. Divorce. Separation. Restraining Order. Sell my half of the penthouse. What is scaring me the most right now is not knowing what Alex is going to do now, especially since I left him. He's a lot more powerful and stronger than I am - financially and physically

The minute I stepped out of the car in the drive way at the Trump World Tower, the concierge came to greet me. I had him and his team of valet men, load my bags onto the cart. A George Clooney look alike threw my leather bags onto the cart.

"Don't throw my bags like that, they cost more than you'll make in a lifetime." I gritted my teeth. In my mind I said, "You don't want to test me, I will have your ass in the unemployment line so fast that you won't know what hit you." I grabbed my purse and the bag of money, and made my way to my new home. The men from the valet followed me like a litter of newborn puppies.

As I entered my new apartment on the 79th floor, I had the concierge working for me as if they were my personal staff. They hung up my clothes in my closet and put all of my suitcases in the corner of the closet. I called for a private towncar to come pick me up so i could go furniture shopping.

Maurice Villency was the first place I stopped at to drop an easy hundred thousand dollars on furniture. They closed down the store when I gave them my Black American Express card.