Rane-e-Dayz

"Rain, rain, go away come again another day. All it ever does is rain in Seattle. Why can't it ever be sunny?" Juniper Rane thought out to the empty coffee shop.
As she drifted back into the story on the screen of her battered laptop, the door banged open, sending the chimes into song. The door let out the smell of hot scones, and gourmet coffee out into the street and letting in the stench of a wet city into the small shop that Juniper owned.
The steady thump of combat boots came to a stop next to the counter. A tall man waited to order. He had a crew cut that had grown out a little bit, his faced was shaved but had a few scars, and he had a deep tan. His clothes looked like wrinkles were afraid of them and he carried his muscular body with authority and agility.
Impatiently he tapped the bell on the counter as if the bells on the door weren’t enough.
“Wow, how long did you have to wait for your coffee?” the man asked
“Well since I work here, I didn’t have to wait.” Juniper replied icily.
“oh…wow…my bad I didn’t…” he stammered apologetically.
“no problem, it’s a lazy day, what can I get ya?” she asked in her somewhat sugar coated tone.
Juniper couldn’t help but check him out as he made his selection and sat down at his table, not far from her laptop.

***~***~***
Its good to finally be back in America. No one is shooting at me, and its not one hundred degrees at night. If I never go back it will be far too soon. Sirus thought to himself freshly back from Iraq. He had what felt like a permanent tan and sand was always falling out of pockets and socks. He was staying in Seattle for a few months, to help his friend, who was in the hospital. Then he would go home to Missouri and to the young wife that he barely remembered. In their last email she said she was pregnant, but he knew that it wasn’t his. He had been gone for two years. And he hadn’t seen her in almost six months.
Pulling his coat tighter Sirus walked into the little coffee shop a nurse recommended. It didn’t look like much, a tiny window nestled next to a toy shop and a boarded up bar. Rane-E-Dayz Coffee Shope. Hmmm, not much at all. As he opened the door warmth and the aroma of coffee and scones enveloped him like a big bear hug. It was actually bigger on the inside than it looked. Sofas lined the walls and were in front of the small stage in the corner. Tables were scattered around, and the chairs were sprinkled in between. Posters plastered the walls, covering up the old bricks. One woman was sitting behind a battered laptop, it was covered in band stickers and ducktape.
She was tall, around 5’7”, and was athletic looking, and was endowed with what looked like porn star tits. She had very long hair, brown with gold and red streaks in it, and her eyes scanned the screen hungrily, not even looking up at him when the bells on the door began to sing. One tendril of hair escaped from the clip in the back, and fell in front of her face. She impatiently brushed it behind her ear, and kept reading.
Looking around for the waitress he jokingly asked about the service, and her icy retort shocked him out of his usually cool composure; making him stutter out an apology when he realized she was the waitress. He almost left when he got his coffee, but one look at the downpour out side quickly changed his mind. Sirus was trying to think of a cool line to smooth her feathers back down but everything sounded strange in his head. Too much like a pick up line. So he sat back and enjoyed a few cups of coffee.

***~***~***
Coming back to her seat behind the laptop, Juniper watched the screen saver as it played though a few pictures of her old friends, one picture really shook her up. It was at mission dam, and it was Adaire, Joey, herself and James. Joey had gone back to Canada, and James had joined the Marines. She heard that he had gotten hurt pretty bad, and that hurt her. She had always liked James, even though she never acted like it…she regretted that now. Sometimes the past had a way of hurting so much. But a smile graced her lips at the thought of that summer. And her smile looked for all the world like the moon coming from behind a thunder cloud. She finally logged in and got back to Storywrite.com so she could finish reading that story.
***~***~***
Sirus couldn’t help himself, he flipped though the art mag on his table, but his eyes kept watching her, the way she walked after closing the till, the way she slowly shook cinnamon into her cup of coffee and stirred it as she walked. And when she smiled that slightly sad smile, his heart jumped into his throat so fast he almost choked on it. When she smiled it shook out all the hard lines in her twenty-something, face and made her look like an angel. Adrenaline flowed through his veins like some magical drug, making his feet tap on the floor and his hands shake.
“Hi, my name is Sirus, and I am really sorry for what I said earlier.” Both of them seemed surprised by Sirus’ sudden apology.
“Umm, I’m Juniper, I own the place.” She replied slowly, as if she were walking on an icy sidewalk.
“So what’s up with the name? I get its rainy days but why that particular spelling?” Sirus asked timidly.
“Well Rane is my middle name, but I don’t like rain, like the water kind.” God why did you say that! Juniper thought angrily, he’s gonna think your insane! Or weird! She didn’t even question why she suddenly cared about what he thought. Her eyes did keep straying to his muscled body under his Marines Corps t-shirt She caught him looking her over too, but wasn’t embarrassed, all the guys checked her out, she was in shape, but busty. Not their fault they couldn’t help but look. My hair is probably a mess, and I didn’t put any makeup on either…damn it.
***~***~***
Damn, her voice was like velvet, or silk. Soft, and warm. Juniper Rane, crazy name. Sirus’ thoughts floated lazily around the room as they talked of home, the war and where they had both traveled.
She was from Montana but he was from Missouri. The hours passed them by, the clock kept running but their hearts could only open and take in the moment. Two customers interrupted their world but only for a moment. They were talking about traveling the world together when Sirus choked on the time.
“Shit! Shit! It’s already eight! I gota’ go!” he exclaimed
“Where…why? What’s so important now?” Juniper asked angrily.
“My friend James is in the hospital and I can only visit him for a few hours a day.” Sirus said while grabbing all his stuff, which had somehow managed to get scattered all over the shop.
Juniper stood in the center of his whirlwind and watched as he threw a ten on the counter and urgently pulled on his coat. Suddenly he stopped, gave he an almost sheepish look and pulled her into his arms. Looking into her hazel eyes he gently brushed her lips with his, his deep brown eyes closing in hushed ecstasy.
He then released her, reluctantly and walked out the door and ran up the street, throwing a quick wave over his shoulder. Juniper was on the curb, watching him run up the street to an old blue truck. He honked twice as he drove away.
***~***~***

Juniper was practically soggy when she came back into the Rane-E-Dayz Coffee Shope. Her heart was still racing from the kiss and she swore that she could still smell him…Old Spice, and strength. That was his scent. And from then on Old Spice would bring back memories of Sirus, no matter how fleeting the scent. It would bring back images of his face and the touch of his kiss.

...to be continued SOON!

Author notes

this is just a start...i dont know if i shoudl keep going...tell me what ya think! hope ya enjoy!!!

hey do you like? its just a start

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Comments


  • Donkey
    April 28

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    great!

    wow, that was awesome. the character descriptions are really good, and i want to see how the james situation pans out if she still likes him!


  • tallblondie gold member
    March 9, 2008

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    Good work

    Not many writers can switch POV's as often as you did and still keep the flow. You did quite well, the story overall flowed quite nicely.

    I wonder... are the two James' the same?
    It would be an improbable coincidence otherwise...

    beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 4.


  • AugustDaylight
    February 28, 2008

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    I like how you switch back and fourth between the characters, it helps give off a well written discrition of thoughts. I definitely like this, keep writing and I'll keep reading. :]


  • Rosemary silver member
    June 14, 2007

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    Good start

    Good descriptions. Your main characters are well defined. You have a good story and subplot. I would keep going. As a reader I'm wondering what will happen next?