Another important thing I should mention is her cat, which is named Bratty, Bitchy, Breezy, Bree, Christmas-tree hider... and many, many more things. That's enough back story, hope you get a good wacky laugh.
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The Ballad of Mother's Day Wishes
She's the buffest ruler one's ever seen,
a solid rock and a glorious Queen.
Only Breezy stumbles before her pleas,
for a hundred names she has for she.
A nuisance, however, plagues her thought,
for even a Queen can be distraught.
To the closet she goes as it buggers her mind,
in her reflection lies the answer she'll find.
Marveling in front of the magical mirror,
admiring the muscles she holds so dear.
When no one's around, she sadly asks thee,
'Oh immaculate mirror, my skin hangs free.'
The mirror responds, ' Thou darest cross-dress. '
' I'm not that kind of Queen ', says the empress.
' But thou conceals here in thy wardrobe.'
' To hide from the eyes of those who probe. '
' Thou garden of majesty, thee is so firmest. '
' My bicep is large, but impeded by dermis. '
' Aye fair lady, thou hast no reason. '
' If you say that again, I'll behead you for treason. '
' Queen! ' cries the Mirror. 'I haven't a head! '
' It was a figure of speech - I'll smash you instead. '
' Forgive me, my majesty, what shallest I say? '
' That loose skin will vanish by Mother's day.'
' Oh shining, merciful star - I can do thine naught. '
' You better,' warns Her. ' A hammer I've sought. '
' Oh my ' gulps the Glass. ' Then I swearest to thee - '
' - that thy wish will come true, or pieces I be.'
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I hung this on her mirror and placed a hammer underneath it
Honorable mention
Bronze trophy winner
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