To Live Would Be a Great Adventure

Peace, of all the abstract thoughts that trouble my mind, peace is one of those that I think I understand (at least in part). Peace is that pure and utter calm that sometimes just settles over you like a warm toasty blanket, encompassing every aspect of life and body. You sit there and no matter how rushed or upset you should be, you feel like nothing can go wrong and everything will somehow work out. I don’t get these little bits and pieces of peace (ha! A pun) very often, but when I do it is one of the greatest feelings there is. Sometimes I get these great peaces right after a sickness. When my body is held hostage by some foreign power, it is just about ready to hold up the white flag, when relief comes…

After hours of battling, the general in my brain sends word to the captains to prepare for surrender.

“ We have fought hard,” he says. “ But we’re just losing to many boys. Prepare to end in whatever way seems best to you…”

The Captains are terrified but one lone soldier braves the battlefield, to confront the enemy. Hours pass, while the cowardly captains hide behind lymph nodes, watching, watching and waiting. When Suddenly the foreign assault stops. The soldier returns across my fevered blood stream and brings with him a message:

“ Ve’ Surrender control to you… Ve’ vill leave this territory and never veturn!”

There is no wide spread rejoicing, everyone is to tired for that, instead a peace descends like a soft snow. The realization that everything will be okay and that bigger forces are looking out for me.

So I sit here all drugged up and know in all the corners of my body that all will be fine, and the worst is over. Whatever lies ahead for me, I am ready. I don’t feel like I can take the world on, but I do feel that maybe the world is ready to take me on. In these moments of peace I know that I am no longer in control and in fact to be at peace is to surrender control to your maker. I sit back, staring out the window, and stop wishing for death. I’m ready, I suppose, for all the change and pain, love and joy. To live, I think, to live would be an awfully big adventure.