The eye is a window to the soul, revealing the secrets of the heart, I know, I am an expert in reading them, and it is because of your eyes that I must visit you. Your eyes boast of pride, arrogance, and condescension, the source of all of this world’s injustice, and I have come to correct those injustices. I am come to heal your eyes and while I stare deeply into them I see the healing process begin, as I plunge my knife into your chest and watch the dark cloak of death descend like a curtain over them.
A contest entry
- Short, Sweet, and Sizzling by Arcularis.
750 points, ended May 26, 2007, 17 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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I love it I love it mr typo ~ i LOVE DEATH YUMMM !!!
simple sweet and temting with such an escense of darkness it creeped into my red cold heart and boiled my with hell
ha ha blair xxxo -
This was a very interesting piece indeed. I loved the way you described why the character was doing what he did. The use of language there is vivid and fluent. I like the way the murder is described as 'healing your eyes', what an interesting way to put it.... a very nice atmospheric piece.
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This was...very interesting!
I loved it though!
Good job!
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You've got the beginnings of something really scary going on here.
I agree with the comment below. You should defidently expand on this later!
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Yes, I dig this a lot. After the contest, I'd like to see this expanded. This is a good and evil character and would be cool see more in depth charactization. Very cool.
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ooooo, very nice. the title gives away nothing adn the words that you use and the way that you use them gives a life to this piece that can be hard to achieve in so few words! really nice job with this!
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Wow.
That is all I have to say, besides I love it, of course!
Its length didn't matter, you conveyed your point and it was very expressive. Very.
Great job! -
Wow. Powerful. Interesting approach to the way the death is invited.
good luck! -
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Thanks
I am not a death and murder kind of person but I could't pass up your 100 word contest, they are too much fun!
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