Rememberance

1

For as long as I can remember. I have always wanted to work in the social services. Bringing justice and peace into families was my greatest of ambitions, but living in the UAE, I’ve got my work cut out for me. Islam is the one thing bonding families together more than any service is capable of. This is a great blessing and I’m thankful, but from time to time it does get tedious. I want to be doing something! I want to solve those cases that fill you with righteous anger…2

I was so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I didn’t see her come in at first. She was a middle aged woman with an ashen face. At first glance she appeared a lot older than she was supposed to be. There were traces of great beauty replaced by lines and bruises. Looking at her was like looking at a dried red rose. It was only a husk of its former beauty. 3

The thing that struck me the most was the strength and determination, burning among the raw wounds and scars in her eyes. I wanted to put my hands out to cup that flame to keep it from being snuffed out. I quickly assessed all of this as I reached out to shake her hand and introduce myself. 4

I saw the flash of uncertainty in her eyes, and struggled to put her at ease. We chatted quietly about mundane things, and I answered her questions about myself, my marital status and if I had children. 5

I didn’t mind these questions at all, because people seeking help find assurance in that small connection. When at last she seemed reassured, she started telling me a story more dark and dreary than anything I’ve heard in all my years. A story I’m sure will haunt me for the rest of my life.6

“I don’t know how to begin” she started “I can’t tell exactly what happened to change him and how he changed”7

She shuddered involuntarily then stiffened herself and went on with her tale. 8

“He beats me. He slaps me. He punches me. He swears at me, even at work in front of my co-workers. He has made my life pure hell over the years and I wish it was just my life he’s so fond of degrading” She met my eyes steadily “Have you ever seen any of your children hit with sharp objects till they were bleeding and have to be rushed to the emergency room?”9

“How old are your children?” I asked gently10

“Not as young as your own” she smiled sadly at me “May Allah protect yours and keep them from the horrors my family has. I have three daughters and one little boy. My daughters are old enough to be married and living with their own families, except they choose not to.” 11

“Is your husband really that bad?” I asked “I’m sure your family will be whole once gain once we’re done. We have counseling for such cases and most usually men like this reform”12

“You don’t understand” she exclaimed “ We can’t live with such a monster…ever!! He won’t reform” 13

“What about your children?” I asked “surely they need a father in their lives. It would be wrong to deny them their father”14

The woman started to cry. She shuddered and sobbed with such violence I was afraid they would tear her frail body apart.15

“He can’t live with us” she kept repeating “You don’t know..”16

“Tell me” I said quietly, getting up to put my arm around her shoulders.17

“You don’t understand” she wept brokenly18

“Help me understand” I told her sincerely “I can help”19

For a long while she just wept without answering, and then finally she lifted her head.20

“He comes at night drunken and staggering. He grabs my daughter and locks her in the room with him. I can’t do anything to stop it. He can do whatever he wants with me, but when it comes to my flesh and blood….”21

I reeled with shock.22

“Why didn’t you come for help sooner?” I asked. My heart was suddenly a heavy weight in my chest. 23

She bowed her head for a few minutes, and then looked up at me. 24

“Help me” She said with genuine fear in her eyes “Free me from this man. All we want to do is live alone away from him. I want him to leave me and my daughters and son alone”25

That’s when I realized how much courage it took this woman to reach out and ask for help. 26

I took her hands in my own and promised her that I would do my best. I took her information and decided to make some calls. 27

Procedure required that I interview all parties involved. It was a way to meet both ends and try to come to a compromise.28

I met the eldest daughter alone. She was a sweet young woman,. At first I feared that she would be traumatized for the rest of her life. From what she told me I came to the conclusion that she was dealing with her trauma by praying and getting closer to Allah.29