I saw you when I walked through the door. You were sitting between the fruit bowl and I in an otherwise empty room. 1
I smiled as you raised your head. Looking at your lap, I asked, “Mind if I have a lick?” 2
You grew beneath your jeans. “Take all you want,” you offered.3
“I think I will.” I placed my hand on your thigh and leaned over you, reaching over to stick my finger into the fruit dip and suck it from my fingers.4
One finger touched your hardened length. You gasped; I grinned.5
“Hi, I’m Miranda,” I said, making it sound sexy. I asked your name.6
You answered, “Steven.” That was good enough for me. 7
I wasn’t sure what to do, or how to get out of the awkward position I was in. I lost my balance, and had to place my hand on your crotch. At least I told myself I had to do it, but it excited me to feel you hard beneath your clothes.8
Your hand moved to my breast, kneading it while your fingers left my lips to make their way to my thongs. Moaning, I suggested, “We should close the door.”9
I stood as you got up, dipping your fingers beneath my panties to find me wet before walking to the door to push it shut.10
You walked toward me with a predator’s grace, stalking me, coming closer, forcing me to back up until I was against the wall. I became impatient to feel you inside me. I wrapped my legs around your hips, grinding myself against you until the sensation became unbearable. Your tongue slipped between my lips to mimic the rhythm of your body. 11
I whispered, “God, Steven, you are so good.” A thought sneaked into my mind, and I asked, “Do you have anything?” 12
You swore softly. “Don’t worry about it; I’m on the pill.” 13
You relaxed. You pulled away to slide my panties down, inserting your fingers into me while with you took off your pants. I felt your body replace your fingers. My nails bit into your back. 14
My feet pressed into your thighs, urging you to quicken the pace. You obliged, thrusting harder and faster, my back hitting the wall with every stroke. My hips pressed against yours with your rhythm. 15
“You’re so tight,” you ground out. 16
Your words pushed me over the edge, and I fell up toward the stars. I felt you follow me as you emptied yourself inside my willing body. 17
Exhausted, we slid to the floor together.18
Your body softened and slipped from mine, and I groaned at the loss. Suddenly, I started to laugh, my laughter turning to a gasp as you suckled my breasts.19
You lifted your head to grin down at me. A little wryly, you asked, “Would you like to have dinner with me tonight?” 20
The gleam in my eyes warned you of what you were getting into as I replied, “Only if you’re the main coarse.”21
Author notes
This isn't by far my best erotica, but I would like suggestions of what I can do to make it better.
Just so people know: this is actually written as a fantasy about a guy I've known for a long time but have never gotten the nerve to tell him anything about it. It's not just about two people who happened to end up in the same room together. The last lines were meant to show that it wasn't simply a one-time thing and that these characters do end up together. I hope you enjoy this, but if you have any character complaints im me and I will get them all cleared up or fix the story, whichever works. I don't like people calling my characters slutty when I'm writing in first person. LOL. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it.
* Finally edited. Sorry it took so long... 
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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Wow... um... these are really good
-Joseph -
Very Impressive!
Miranda Nicole...
If I know nothing else...I know I have just read the work of an amazingly gifted writer. I agree with Carnal Knowledge..."if this is not your best, then I don't think I could handle what you would consider "best."
Your word usage is magnificent...and sweetens this erotic journey for your readers with imagery that is not only tantalizing...it's also natural!
It may seem obvious but choosing "the right word" is the key to stimulating the mind of your reader. Memorable words and phrases ("I fell up to the stars" AWESOME PHRASE!)imbue your writing with Miranda Nicole's UNIQUE personality.
Your word choices creates imagery so vivid one feels they are there. Always remember "creative imagery" is the key to memorable writing! I have no doubt that with your talent you could write and sell your own romance novel.
I am certainly adding you to my favorites list and look forward to many more intimate interludes reading your creations.
Lanny -
good write
i did enjoy this story very much, and i like that you followed it up with an explanation . and i hope people don't think your chacter is slutty b/c i would do something like this if i knew the guy like you know the guy you like. anyway, well done! -
This is the first of yours that I read, but I think I will be back for more. I like to read erotic, but I like sensual reads, not pornography. You fit the bill. Nice read. Cheryl
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this is awesome...i definitly need to read more if this isn't your best... this is one of the better erotica pieces that i have read thus far. great job!
~joe~ -
it was really great WOO it made me think maughty thought but i think maybe it needs more introduction.. i dont really get to know the charachters very well maybe a littlw witty banter.. but i guess that isnt really the point of an erotica, it just kinda made her seem slutty. but very vivid and descriptive.
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Thanks for your comment. Yes, I put the little part about protection in there because, in my opinion, a willingness to make love to someone without any barriers shows an emotional connection. That is how I feel about it, anyway. I hate to write erotica that is just an in-your-face screw-me-and-get-it-over-with sort of deal. Even though this story is about two people who don't know each other, I wanted to establish a connection between the characters. Anyway, thanks again. I'm glad you enjoy my writing.
~Miranda
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Miranda,
This was very nice and arousing. I enjoyed the story line - the idea that you would be so brazen. Believe it or not, I also liked the little passage about protection - nice touch. i will read more of your things, for sure.
Scott
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Why doesn't anything like that happen to me!!!....... Whoa Nellie, what a story. Erotic, sensual, just the right amount of suggestion. Great write. Dont worry I'll be back for more.
Regards,
Leo Long
Ps. I need a cigarette. -
LOL. Yeah, the whole spantaneous combustion thing is actually a joke between me and all of my friends, so most people probably won't like that. Most of the time I purposely leave out the surrounding because erotica should, in my opinion, focus more on the people and not the background. Actually, I laugh at myself when I read this one. There is a lot of quirky humor in it that most people probably won't catch, but thanks for your comments. I appreciate it.
~Miranda
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I like this a lot. Being some one who reads a lot of eroitca, I can be quite picky to the point to leaving a read if I dont like it.... and not even leaving a comment. But I like this one alot. Theres only two things. Describe the surroundings so that the reader can get a good mind-picture of where the action is taking place... the other things... spontaneously combust lol doesnt quite go with erotica,, atleast i dont think. When I read that, I instantly thought of Bill Nye, the science guy... other than that, this is a good write! Take care and thanks for sharing
Kayla Dawn -
LOL. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Erotica is actually my favorite category to write. I actually haven't had a lot compliments on this one. People say it's not "raunchy" enough. That is one of my favorite lines also, though. I couldn't decide between two ways to describe the same feeling, so I made them into something all their own. Thanks for your comment.
~Miranda
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Good story, keep writing, the best comes with experience. Read the IM. It is wonderful that you feel you can express yourself through writing. Best of luck in the future. Keep up your literary adventure.
Vici -
Thanks. It's not my best erotica, but I'm glad you like it.
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good for an erotic...
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Hey Miranda. Another great erotic write I see. This one is really hot. I love it. You should really start writing more of these. I love reading your stuff. Thanks for sharing. Keep it up, girl. I know you will.
~Miranda
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