Ever since I heard the story of Draven, he’s been my obsession. I’ve been doing research on him since I was old enough to read. Yes that’s kind of odd for a child, but of course I never had the most normal life. My dad was a Psychiatrist, and my mom was one of his early cured patients. We’ve lived in Iron Mountain, Michigan for as long as I can remember. What makes Draven so interesting to me is that we live in the house that he grew up in, and I have the same room that he had. Weirdly enough I feel a connection to him, like he is still out there, just waiting for the Blood Moon. No one believes me, and my dad has me hopped up on so many kinds of medication. But I know that the story is more than just a myth.1
Old man Pat told me the story of Draven for the first time when I was three, and ever since then I have gone to his house every Saturday to hear the same story. No one can tell a story the way that man does. I feel personally that there is a connection between Draven and Old Man Patterson; it’s something about the way he tells the story and his facial expressions. Anyway, here’s how the story goes.2
“No one knows Draven’s real name. He really liked sweets. By the age of 15 all of his adult teeth had already fallen out, so his crazy father being the demented scientist of the town, made a set of teeth for his son out of metal, wit points as sharp as knives. His mom left when he was just a baby, and his father was labeled crazy because of his weird experiments. Draven was always the center of his father’s experiments (which is probably what made him so crazy). His father used unsterilized needles and unlicensed chemicals in the experiments.3
“No one knows exactly what happened, but one day during an experiment, Draven snapped. It’s believed that all the random and various chemicals had genetically altered Draven and given him unbelievable speed and strength. During a major experiment, Draven finally lost all control over himself and broke out of the leg, arm, and head straps, only to kill his father. But the worst part is how he did it. He used the gift from his father to make incisions in his father’s body, and he hung him by his heels to bleed to death. 4
“The scream his father let out when his son made the first incision awoke the whole town. “But with the reputation his father had the sheriff just held all calls and sent everyone home”. 5
“He decided to go check it out by himself. He had gone and checked the house many times before and it turned out to be nothing. But this time was going to be different. When he pulled into the driveway, he casually walked up to the front door only to find it cracked. Then a disturbing sound broke the silence. Someone was choking on their own blood. As soon as he heard this, he called for backup and ran back to his car. He opened the trunk and got out his best friend, an unofficial and unlicensed double barrel sawed-off shotgun. He always kept it with him in case of times like these. When he got back to the house the door was not just cracked but now it was fully open! He entered, looking around in every direction to make sure it was safe. He continued through the house—that was, until he heard footsteps and decided it was better to wait outside until back up arrived. When he turned to walk out the front door, he was confronted by a seven and a half foot and 450 pound monster. By the time he brought up his gun and fired a shot, the beast had already made his entrails his extrails, and the sheriff could only watch with his dying breath as Draven scooped out his heart and took a big bite.6
“By the time backup arrived Draven was long gone and the two bodies he left behind couldn’t even be identified.”7
After hearing this story for the first time as a child, I was terrified for the next couple of years. As I reached the age of 8 the fear started to subside as I felt an odd sensation calming me and telling me not to worry.8
Old Man Patterson continued with the story by telling me of murders that happened years a later at “The World’s Largest Carnival.” 9
He started the story with “It was about six years later when the murders started to occur. At first the carnival was thought to be haunted because people were going missing and parents couldn’t find their children.10
“Draven had made a normal life for himself as a circus performer, but it was a very dangerous job. He had worked his way up the carnival ladder and had become the main act. He juggled. But why is that so amazing? It’s amazing because of what he juggled. He juggled knives, swords, motorcycles, and even dynamite. “All of the other acts new it was just an accident waiting to happen…then one day it did.11
“During the act Draven had already passed the part with the knives, swords, and motorcycles, but the dynamite--that was going to get messy. All the dynamite was low grade but still dangerous. Every stick that was going to be used in the act had to be inspected, but somehow one stick with a shorter fuse made its way into Draven’s hand.12
“There he was--he had the crowd eating out of the palms of his hands. They were amazed as he juggled knives, and even more so as he pulled out the swords. Then they all gasped at the feat of strength he showed in juggling the motorcycles. Then it happened: the dynamite was pulled and lit. During half of the second rotation, the short fused stick exploded right in his face.13
“All medical teams ran to him and rushed him to the hospital; the screams he let out were unimaginable. The blast that he had just encountered had unBlackd some dormant door, and he was rushed with painful memories he had somehow managed to lock away. As he was being rushed through the hospital halls, all of the equipment was bringing back even more memories (especially the syringes). With a last cry, he went quiet. Wondering what happened; everyone stopped and looked at him. That was their fatal mistake.14
“With blinding speed he was off of the gurney, and the main doctor was thrown on it, and with his amazing strength he folded it in half. The crunches were as loud as the sticks of dynamite going off. Screams were erupting from everywhere. Draven was on a killing rampage. Bodies were all over the place: on the floors, on the counters, on couches, chairs, and everywhere else you could imagine. Finally they brought the thing down with enough sedation to kill ten elephants, and all that did was stun him enough to put him on another gurney, but this time they strapped him down (if only they knew the history between Draven and body straps). 15
“It had been nearly an hour and a half, and no one had heard from the guards, but no one was willing to go into the room. So the police called in Special Ops to take care of it. Hearing the story behind the deranged thing, special ops decided to send in their best two agents. When they arrived they were ready to go. They entered the room and shut the door. Then there was silence until they heard one of the troops yell, “OH MY GOD”, and then nothing but gun fire. All of a sudden everything got extremely quiet. When they thought the coast was clear, the local PD went in to check everything out. What they found was horrible. When they walked in one of the troops was hanging from the ceiling by his intestines, and the other one was nowhere to be found. Searching the whole room they found nothing. The Police heard lots of screams and ran to the window where they found the other trooper standing on the ledge outside, and a fleeing image of Draven. The total death toll from a patient that went into an uncontrolled and disoriented rage was twenty-eight. When the trooper on the ledge was finally rescued, he wouldn’t speak. No matter how hard they tried to get him to, he just refused to speak. Special Ops called in the top psychiatrist in the state, who happened to be my great-great-Grandfather Lock.16
“After working with the trooper for weeks, there was still no progress. Grandfather Lock was out of ideas. So while he was sitting in his office, trying to figure out his next move he heard loud footsteps on the linoleum floors. The weird thing about the footsteps was that no one else was in the building except for Grandfather Lock and the patents, but all of them were in their cells. The footsteps were growing louder and then the sound of stainless steel doors being ripped off of their hinges. Grabbing his .45, he walked out into the hallway to check out the problems. What he saw was life changing. He saw a monster with a body in its hands ravaging it with its gleaming teeth. He saw Grandfather Lock, and, surprisingly, just looked away and continued to eat. Firing round after round, not one bullet penetrated the steel-like skin of Draven. The monster finally got up and came face to face with Grandfather Lock. The stench of sweat and blood was horrible. Draven lowered to Grandfather Lock’s level and said, “Would you like some gum?” Not knowing what to say Grandfather Lock asked calmly (mainly because he was in shock and calmness was the only emotion available to him) 17
“Why do you kill and what exactly are you?’. Calmly the giant sat down but was still eye level with Grandfather Lock. Gently Draven said, 18
“I’m only somewhere in my teen years; my father was a demented scientist in Michigan that ran all kinds of tests and experiments on me, which gave me my incredible size, strength, and urge to kill!” All Grandfather Lock could say was19
“Why am I not dead right now?” With a gentle reply Draven said20
“The voices told me not to” Curious as to what was going on with this youthful beast, Grandfather Lock sat there for what he said seemed like an hour or two, but in truth he had sat there all night and talked to the most feared killer in all the states. 21
“The experiments and torture this poor boy survived (if you can call it surviving) made Grandfather Lock understand him all the more. He offered Draven help, and right as he was going to take it, the nightly patrol came in and saw the monster. He then pulled his stun gun. Running furiously at Draven, he only had seconds to live.”22
“The way this institution guard died was horrific: when the guard was within reach, Draven grabbed the guards arm and shoved it down his throat with blinding speed. The bad part about it was the stun gun was still on and shocked all of the guard’s major organs causing them to explode internally. With a frightful howl, he tore into the guard’s esophagus.23
“Grandfather Lock went and tried to calm what in all reality was just a frightened child, but Draven wouldn’t have it. He grabbed Grandfather Lock and threw him into a holding cell and closed the door. I believe it was for his own safety, but we all know that Draven could have ripped that door off of its hinges with no problem.”24
“Grandfather Lock didn’t dare move out of fear of infuriating the lost teen. Then it happened. He heard loud boot steps fading away until it was just a low beating sound, and then they disappeared all together.25
“When he was sure Draven was gone, he let himself out of the cell (luckily he always kept his keys with him) and immediately went to work disposing of the bodies before anyone else got there. So he threw the bodies into the old furnace and immediately went to work changing the paperwork so it would look like the trooper was sharing a cell with a known and crazed gang leader. 26
“Then he came up with the story to back it up. He was sitting in his office when he heard a group of people. He went to check it out when he was confronted by a group of at least 30 people. He recognized them as the gang that goes by the name of Fatal Encounter. They must have come to free their boss because they had all kinds of gadgets and gizmos that just ripped the door right off the wall. They knocked Grandfather Lock out and when he awoke they were all gone. After doing this he went to the leader of the gang’s cell and let him loose. The leader wasn’t a small soul either. Grandfather Lock told the leader to go ahead and leave, but to do it in a hurry. Walking slowly the leader who went by the name of Leviathan, looked at Grandfather Lock and said “I owe you one.” 27
“Not ten minutes after Grandfather Lock had finished the paperwork and freed the patient, the morning shift came in. But all day the only thought going through Grandfather Lock’s head was “why did I help him, why didn’t I just let the police handle it?” The only solution he could come up with was that he wanted to help Draven and not put him in any more pain than he was already in, and jail time and the death sentence would definitely hurt him more. Or would the death sentence free him? Not knowing what to do, Grandfather Lock did what any ordinary person would do and panicked. If he was caught helping a notorious killer, then he would rot in jail for the rest of his life.28
“So he decided to do the only thing that he could do, and that was run.”29
“Leaving his office and going straight home he packed all the necessities and he left. Not knowing where to go, he just drove making blind turns wherever he felt the urge (Trying desperately to get somewhere unfamiliar, but that vision came to an abrupt halt when he ran into a police road block).”30
“Police officers were turning all motorists around and taking them on detours. When Grandfather Lock pulled up and asked what was going on, the officer said that they had Draven trapped in a nursing home. He had apparently gone on a wild killing spree and killed over 40 elderly residents. The building was completely surrounded by police officers, swat members, and every three letter organization you could possibly imagine (thinking to himself that he had to step up somehow, but how could he without turning himself over?)”31
“Thinking quickly”, he said, “I called and reported a break in last night. It was Draven, but he didn’t hurt anything or anyone, all though we did come face to face and we established some sort of friendship last night. But the operator took it as a joke.”32
“The officer told him to wait where he was and headed off to get the head of the whole operation, Mr. Lee, and when they got back, Mr. Lee asked Grandfather Lock if he would be willing to go in and talk to the beast of a man. Without hesitation Grandfather Lock agreed one hundred percent. He didn’t even have time to think about the question before he answered. There had to be some sort of connection between him and this boy.”33
“They strapped Grandfather Lock with a bullet proof vest and another.45, but Grandfather Lock knew none of it was any good. If Draven wanted him dead, then dead he would be. The vest could be ripped through with those magnificently deadly set of razor-sharp teeth, and the gun—well that worked out great last time.34
“So Grandfather Lock proceeded to enter the building feeling as courageous as he ever would. As soon as he opened the door, the stench of death hit him like a bowling ball soaked in garbage. Proceeding in, there was no sign of Draven—that was until he heard a loud laugh.35
“There were mutilated bodies everywhere. He used sick methods of killing. Grandfather Lock even saw one man with his body in a complete circle (figure out how that one works). Continuing on, he finally found Draven sitting on the couch watching the report on the news and actually enjoying it.” 36
In my mind I felt like if he didn’t want to be caught, then he wouldn’t be.37
“Mustering all the strength and courage in his body, Grandfather Lock walked into the room and stood right in front of the thing. With so much calm but yet with the most intimidating voice, Draven looked at him and said “Can you move over, I can’t see?”38
“Astounded at this, he moved over and out of the way of the television. Then Draven spoke again, and he said “You want to sit down? 39
There’s plenty of room.” Grandfather Lock walked over and sat down.40
“Why do you kill? And why do the voices tell you not to kill me?” The weirdest reply came out of Draven’s mouth: 41
“They like you” he said, “and as fer the others, they annoy us.”42
“After that came complete silence, and about an hour later, Draven casually got up and started to walk away. When asked where he was going his reply was “for a last meal before I leave” What happened next was horrible: Draven walked over and pulled the arm off of a guard and casually walked to the door eating it. Then came a sudden scream “NO!” it said, and wondering where it came from and why the voice sounded so familiar, Grandfather Lock was shocked to figure out the scream came from him. Draven turned around with a surprised jerk and gave a curious look. “Don’t go out there, they’re waiting for you” said Grandfather Lock. “There’s got to be some way out of here without you having to be caught” Searching the building up and down, Grandfather Lock found a man-hole and told Draven to find a way out down there. Thinking how it would look suspicious if he survived two encounters with Draven with no injury, Grandfather Lock made a request that he thought only a crazy person would make. He asked Draven to bit him on the shoulder and the arm, but not hard enough to break anything or fatally wound him. “OK” said Draven “but I don’t like this.” The pain he felt under the razor sharp teeth was excruciating, but then it was over, and Draven was gone. Limping out of the building, Grandfather Lock was immediately met by the ground as he fell into darkness.43
“He awoke the next day in a hospital bed, but couldn’t move. There were still guards and special ops members everywhere, all over the hospital and everywhere you else you could imagine within a ten mile radius. They weren’t taking any chances after what occurred the day before. But if they knew the real friendship that was established between Draven and Lock then they would be sitting idly outside. Then Mr. Lee walked in and said,44
“We caught him.” The only thought that could go through Grandfather Locks head was “how?” That’s when his question was answered. “We caught him trying to escape through the sewer tunnels but luckily we had troops with foam guns down there and they got him, the foam from the guns harden on impact and immobilizes the suspect but we had to use four rounds. One round could stop a stampede. Then he was sentenced to immediate death by electrocution. They shocked him twice, but he survived. Then they tried lethal injection, but his body pushed the chemicals out. So we had to go to olden times and behead him. His last words were ‘I’ll be back, just wait for the Blood Moon.’ That’s not the part that bothered me though, the part that got to me was when he claimed that you were his only friend. How did that happen?” All Grandfather Lock could say is that they talked in the home and he guessed that that was the closest to a friend he’s ever had.45
“After leaving the hospital Grandfather Lock did some research on the Blood Moon, and it’s a satanic night that happens once a decade, and surprisingly it was only three days away.46
“Weirdly enough two days after doing the research Grandfather Lock suffered a massive heart attack and died at his house.”47
I think Draven was somewhere in the afterlife waiting calling for Grandfather Lock and that’s why he went. Its also my belief that when Draven returns, I will see my great-great-grandfather.48
The blood moon has come and passed twice but still there was no sign of the killer but something told me that this time was going to different, and now it was only two days away.
A contest entry
- The Pale Horse by Oblivion Kitty God.
395 points, ended April 3, 2007, 11 entries
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Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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interesting...
there is no flow to the story, the dialogue needs to be spaced out for easy reading. thanks for entering in my contest -
I have already commented this one, so god luck again.
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interesting
This was very interesting. I would be terrified if i had heard a story like that when i was little. This was very good and imaginative. Great job and thank you for entering the contest. -
This was certainly interesting but it kind of dragged and I lost interest in the middle.
It was a good job but, and I wish you well in the contest.
Lady Madeline.
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Well written, but a few grammar mistakes here and there. Nice job.
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This was a very interesting story, althought I am not sure I know which link/quote I gave you. Please let me know. Thanks for entering. Good luck. God Bless!
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I did like this. It was intersting and imaginative. Thank you for joining my contest. Good luck!
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interesting
Personally, I don't see any redeeming features in Sweet Tooth, but I liked it all the same. I don't understand why the doctor and the little girl felt so close to him. He killed old people! Jerk. heh.
Good story. There were grammar errors and I think the paragraphs were a bit messed up, but I still enjoyed reading it. -
I liked this alot, I wonder (and hope) that you will make this into a longer book because it's really good if not *=(*. Well thanks for entering my contest.

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Sweet Tooth, eh? Curious. Twisted Metal anyone? Lol. A curious story with a nice little splash of wickedness thrown in here and there. You did well on this work. Thank you for entering my contest.
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Whoa
The title says it all... this is TWISTED! But it's really great! It's long, but it kept me reading the entire time. Your sentence structure may need a few touch ups in a couple of places, but that didn't take away from the quality of the story. The ending really surprised me, I loved it! Welcome to the site and I hope to read more from you soon!
~Kami
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