~ Thirteen candles in a ring ~. A ring of fire around me as I sit on the coarse, carpeted floor of the darkened living room. The dancing flames cast grotesque shadows on the bare, painted walls. I bow my head, eyes closed, towards the small mirror clasped in my pale hands. I breathe deep. My eyes meet my reflection beneath the sculptured dragon encircling the glass. Two orbs, barely distinguishable as blue-grey of colour in the dim candlelight. For a while, I am still, allowing the gently music playing softly to embrace me as I search inside my own reflection. I allow myself to be lifted by the melody and drift away to the hidden realms inside my heart.
~ Twenty-seven dreams flutter like moths around my head ~. Each dream a different shade of emotion; a different shade of love. As I lose myself in meditation, I look deeper into my reflection, deeper into my heart. I see you smiling back at me from my own reflection. I see you smiling from within my heart.
~ Thirty droplets of silver ~. The treasure around my neck glistens in the mirror glass. I clasp the chain gently between my painted fingertips. Each tiny droplet of silver holds a precious memory which fills my head and my heart as I slowly trail my fingertips along the chain. Each droplet, linked together by the bond I share with you. The many miles which separate us are nothing when you are always close to me. I am never alone for you walk with me as I tread life’s mysterious paths. You bring the light I need to help me see into the darkness of the future and to banish the haunting demons which linger in the past. You give this bland world its colour and the birds their morning song of spring. A burning sensation in my heart scorches me as I think only of you, the twinkling star of hope which shines brighter than any shade of grey which surrounds my hopes.
~ The church bell echoes in the night ~. The striking of another hour passed but yet the drawing nearer of the hour when you and I will be united once more. And on that day, the melancholy toll of the church bell will chime in celebration. Before the clock has finished announcing the hour, the candles are extinguished and I climb the stairs to the highest room. The window on the far wall of the cold, empty room looks out onto the tombs of the dead. The many lonely, broken hearts, which one day will rise to witness our fairytale played out in flesh and blood, and the garden of wilted flowers will bloom in the light we shine.
~ The horizon; a city of burning light ~. From this room, I gaze out into the endless night sky. Nothing disturbs the bleak, empty night sky beyond my window. The orange glow of the city light glitters on the horizon showing me the road to where you are. I reach out. Cold glass. The transparent barrier keeping me from your warm embrace. As I gaze out into the sky above, I see a solitary, twinkling star shining alone in the heavens. I close my eyes and I breathe out emotion. In the breath on the glass, I carefully write three golden words. The golden ‘I love you’ that you inscribed upon my heart as we parted. I am so far away from where the heart desires, yet my heart is not pained by the absence of your voice, your touch, of your love, for I will always carry you with me, holding you close to me.
~ The tall, dark and slender tree is silhouetted against the charcoal sky ~. The outlining detail is clearly visible against the emptiness of the sky. Like the tree, we will stand out among the blandness of life. Our every detail will be defined as we live each day side by side and as we walk each long, winding road hand in hand. Even when you’re far away, you are always here with me. I draw the curtain to conceal the scene beyond the glass and I lay myself to sleep between the cold sheets. The shadows on the ceiling form outlines of your face as I lay in the dark. Although you are many miles from me, you are still the only one I kiss goodnight. A part of you is always at my bedside keeping me safe as I allow sleep to take hold, and when I wake you’re still the first one I see. The one giving me the strength the rise and face the world each day.
~ Seven days there’s yet to be ~. Seven days before we will meet again and hold each other close. Seven days before your eyes will meet with mine again and allow me access to the hidden corners of your heart. Seven days before your gentle whisper will sing its soothing lullaby in my ear as I sleep. There’s only seven days until
~ two hearts will finally beat as one ~.
Author notes
A story written using lines and themes from some of my recent poems. The lines I have taken from my poems are the opening lines of each paragraph and the final line of the story. My poems can be viewed at allpoetry if anyone is interested in seeing the lines in true context.
A contest entry
- Just Wanna Read! by Amelia-Anne-Black.
114 points, ended March 30, 2007, 13 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Hopeless Romantic by Tigerlilly91.
210 points, ended April 29, 2007, 7 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - "Here's Looking at You Kid" by katiefran.
400 points, ended May 9, 2007, 15 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
this is very good. you used a unique writing style that goes very nicely with your words. they, by the way, were chosen very nicely. every word seemed to be thought of carefully before you put it on the page. the flow of words and emotions was beautiful and compelling. thank you so much for entering my contest and good luck.
-
That was sweet! I liked how you used the numbers/line thing. Thanks for entering.
Kelsey -
wow
That was beautiful and just wonderful. I love your word flow. The poetic lines starting each paragraph is a stroke of genius! Very, very well done. I wish it was longer, but at the same time I don't because it's so great the way it is.
There were a few spelling errors, but still, very well done! BRAVO! And thank you for entering my contest.
-
Woow! An E-motional Epic Saga of a Story!!!
Right off the bat in the 1st paragraph I found a small suggestion for you in the 2nd to last sentence...
allowing the gently music playing softly to embrace me as I search inside my own reflection.
Suggestion: swapped it like this... allowing the music to gently and ever so softly embrace me as I search inside my own reflection... My other suggestion would be to either take out gently or softly because you got 2 adverbs there and it sorta was rough and not so smooth But heres the ebst suggestion: allowing the GENTLE music playing softly to embrace me as I search inside my own reflection. Thats a much better idea sorry my brain just started to work. Onto the 2nd paragraph I go...
2nd paragraph 1 minor suggestion:
I look deeper into my reflection, Take the word I out because you don'treally need it and merely add this LOOKING so it goes Looking deeper into my reflection, Because when you read your story it'll flow and sound much better just an idea. so far enjoyed the poem on to paragraph #3 I go...
3rd paragraph was beautiful and it flowed perfectly and I saw nothing worth of noting but really liked the impact and e-motion built into that paragraph. Onto the 4th paragraph I go
4th paragraph seems rather interesting and was slightlyu hard to keep up with but I got where you were going with this so far so good. Onto the 5th paragraph I go.
5th paragraph sio far was the most e-motional riding one yet and I was extremely impressed at how the staory is so far tieing into each other and interwining to become a Great story. so far so good I am hooked wanting to know what happens next.
6th paragraph *sigh* I really felt that e-motional punch at the end of that 6th paragraph and it mad eme shed a very rare tear *sigh* That was beautiful that he is your only one who continues to watch over you and be there for you. That just really makes me cry because I don't know what that is like ...
7th and final paragraph the last the very last line really summed this story up beautifully and your plott was semi slow to start off then it eally picked up but I have to admit you got the talent to write some good stories.
I really loved this story and thus you shall get my 3 applauses sdeservingly because you made me break down badly in that 6th paragraph and anyone who can do that to me which I rarily express my e-moitions deserves to get standing ovations and my gratitude and respect for life not that you didn't already have it because I love you Sweet Sam and always will
Beautiful work all round and congrats on writing such a finely penned poem! Keep up the great work. 
With love for you always, Paul
beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 4.
Adding your comment:
