The sun was setting, the moon was rising, soon it would be time, for the mystical creatures to come out to play, what will I see, would be unknown as each and every growing day, it changes. Pixies maybe, Fairies, Angels, or unicorns, the time, will soon come. A unicorn rose with the breeze. His eyes lie upon me, and mine his. He spoke to me through his mind; I spoke to him through mine, then I was in a trance, I walked up to him, and got onto his back, I glanced at his spiralling horn. Then we were of, of on our magical journey, the journey through love, the journey to the hearts of many!1
Author notes
This is more of a fantasy story.
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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When are you going to poste the rest?! It started very good, with very good and vivid imageries. I hope you consider writing more to add at this paragraph.
Hugs,
Mari
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Firstly I love the background. Perfect setting for the mystical journey. And I love the ending " journey through love, journey to the hearts of many". I believe in our own way we are trying to reach that place to give, share and be love. Well Done. Awesome write.
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Beautifully penned once again my new old friend
Stuck in the middle of this cosmic riddle
Either You're
Leonardo Di Vinci or John Lennon or both
Either way your remain eternally AWESOME to all of US
And you do share your love with..IN TRUTH AND BEAUTY
THIS IS WHAT YOU DO YOU ARE LOVE AND LOVING
AND I THANK GOD 4 YOU
YOU RAIN within eternal rains of love love love
Glistening streaks of light upon the river black,
Dancing in a trance in which I travel back,
To a time where dolphins speak and unicorns run free,
Shall this magic always be?
Where the river runs black dolphins swim and play,
Giving me new insight to shine on through this day.
5/19/04 11:47:27 PM
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I agree with Pessimistic Optimism , I also like the descrption of the landscape! Thanks for sharing this.....good luck in my contest
pinkwhite -
i like the description of the landscape and surroundings you paint in the opening lines. almost like a background in a painting. although the description is well done, i feel that is just that...description. i don't feel drawn into the story, but overall i like the fanciful feel of this. after reading your author's note (you called this a poem) i had to smile because i write my poetry in the same form (paragraph style) instead of line by line. good luck in the contest and keep writing
xo Pessimistic Optimism -
Good start
This would make an interesting story for sure, I wonder how the rest would go. I enjoyed it. -
Good thinking good poem I liked it a lot poetry is hard and storys are even harder but good luck in all of it and good job
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What a great start for a book would this be,it would be interesting to see how you would continue it.Although it would work quite well as a poem by itself also.
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very GOOD!
Great Job! Keep up the good work! I think the structure needs a little revision, but other than that, it was very creative! -
Wow! i love this! great job. Tatum
Edited on May 16, 3:16 p.m. because ''.
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