Hello. My name is Harold Johnson, and I cannot remember.
You see, if it’s not too much trouble, I’m looking for someone. I can’t say I’m really sure who… I have this condition. It’s a short term memory thing. Every few seconds my mind will just get wiped clean… It’s just as fun as it sounds. Anyway, I can remember everything that happened before the accident: My little sister got killed, and-
Hello. My name is Harold Johnson, and I cannot remember.
Sorry to bother you. I have this picture, but I don’t know who this guy is. He killed my little sister. Whoa, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you… Look, do you have any idea who this dude is? Where I might find him, maybe? I doubt he’d be crying or bloody or wearing that "Korn" T-Shirt if I found him today, but I was hoping that maybe you would recognize him. No, I think you’re-
Excuse, me! Miss!
Hello. My name is Harold Johnson, and I cannot remember. Does the guy in this photo mean anything to you? Look, I need you to tell me quick. No, I’m not in a hurry. I have this short term memory thing. This guy came into my house, killed my sister… He smashed my head on, well, something. I can remember everything before then, but I really-
Hello. My name is Harold Johnson, and I cannot remember.
Oh, I’m sorry. Have we spoken before? I have this short term- Oh, I’ve already told you. So I guess you know I’m looking for the guy in this photo. He killed my- Oh, sorry. I think I took the photo of him so I could show it to the police, but now I can’t remember anything so I guess it helps me a lot in this way. Why so quiet, ma’am? Who are you call-
Hello. My name is Harold Johnson, and I cannot remember.
Would you mind if I asked how long I’ve been at this police station? Two hours. Wow. The time really does fly when you can’t… I guess I’ve already told you that, haven’t I? Well look, I need you to help me find this guy. He’s a murderer and a rapist, and I’m sure you have some sort of file on him. This bastard killed my sister. There’s no time for- What are you-
Hello. My name is Harold Johnson, and I cannot remember.
Bars… Why are there bars? Who are you? What is this? So cold, so much metal, so much stone… Why are my clothes orange? How long have I been here? Shit. Why’s my pocket empty? That’s bad… What the hell is so funny? Give me my god damned snapshot! I need-
Hello-
My, that is an interesting face in the mirror. Do I really have that much beard stubble? The time really does fly when you can’t remember anything. May I ask what’s so funny? Hey, where the hell am I, anyway? Why are there bars and- All right, all right. I’m looking at the snapshot. Nice shirt. OK, I’ll hold it up to the mirror. My, what a coincidence… Wait. No-
Hello. My name is Harold Johnson, and I cannot remember.
Author notes
X-Having a mental or psychological illness. I like this one.
A contest entry
- Easier than 2+2 by On.Cue.
300 points, ended March 31, 2007, 23 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Short Shorts by Delfishie.
175 points, ended April 7, 2007, 15 entries
Honorable winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - 2 Minute Murder Mysteries! by Me and Lyndon.
118 points, ended April 17, 2007, 6 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Mysteries by Blackwings.
170 points, ended May 14, 2007, 10 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - The Best Revenge by Mallig.
400 points, ended January 24, 2008, 10 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Improved version of this story is up under the title "The Odd Predicament of Mr. Michael Harris"
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Oh, this is very clever and it did remind me of Memento, which I loved. I really enjoyed this story, thanks for a great read!
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Excellent
I went through a few of your other stories before deciding to comment here. I must say your writing intrigues me. You have an extremely unique style, and a tendency to portray so much in such few words. I've noticed narration is not overused in your works, and yet you manage to say all that is needed. Something rarely found, so kudos for that.
I'll look forward to future works from you.
Keep writing.
Yrs.
Azaradelle.
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Wow... this is... awesome... and i can't think of anything else to say... x.x ummm...Good job! ^_^
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i loved this!! great idea for a story.. woah..
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Yayness!!!!! I LOVED IT!!!! It was unusual but all the more reason to read it!!!! Nicely done I rlel liked it please keep writing and good luck!!!!!
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wow
nice job, very creative. good luck in the contest
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CRAP!
How the heck am I to rate a story for a contest I'm hosting that I've already raved about before?!
Heh. This is the first time this has ever happened in one of my contests, though undoubtedly not the last.
I really like your story. Obviously. I think it's awesome. See previous post for details. *grins*
Good luck in the contest. -
I've posted a new story meant to replace this one. The new one has better prose, and is much more original. It's called "The Odd Predicament of Michael Harris"... It'd be nice if people would take a gander
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AWESOME!!!!!
AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME! I love it! I mean, holy shades of Memento, Batman, but still this is a really great short story. I love the twist at the end and I love the repetition and the bizarre mystery of it ("why are they arresting this guy? I mean, sure he's annoying with is constantly repeating the same damn line, but he doesn't deserve to be arrested. And thrown in jail? That's such a travesty of justice! I don't under-OOOHHHHHHHH! HE's the one he's referring to! Ewwwww he raped his sister? Incestuous, much?" /train of thought).
I have one MAJOR nitpick though:
It's 'cannot,' not 'can not.' There is no space between and it bugged the hell out of me every time you repeated the catch phrase. Please fix, because otherwise this would be perfect!
Again, great job! Very very enjoyable!
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Thank you!
Having put it up, I soon realized that I'd subconsciously ripped off memento -_-
But those comments mean a lot to me!
Soon, I plan to replace it with a better, more original story about a man who is incapable of concentrating about anything. Thank you! -
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I wouldn't replace it! Just make another story. I really enjoyed this one.
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Brownie Points:
1-Author's Notes
1-Character
1-Korn
1-Originality
Haha, this one made me laugh. Creative way of conveying the thoughts of a man who has a disorder. From what I can see, I didn't catch any grammar/spelling mistakes; however, I did feel that some of the sentences were choppy...maybe that was deliberate but anywhos.
The only thing I must tell you about is that you were way under the word limit (950) That will definately lower your chances of placing.
Good luck and thanks for entering my contest =]
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