In a late night raid last night in Brooklyn, a pumpkin-eating contest was halted when violence broke out among members of the audience. 1
Peter-Peter, the impresario of the event, was advocating that contestants keep their wives in pumpkin shells. 2
"I keep Bessie in there all the time", he said, and she never gives me a bit of trouble.3
Women in the audience were outraged by his suggestion and stormed the podium en masse, armed with rolling pins and heavy iron frying pans.4
Pumpkin was thrown from one end of the hall to the other by the furious bystanders, and police had to escort Peter-Peter from the premises.5
"He will be charged with inciting a riot", Jack Sprat, senior Sargent on duty told the crowd. "Go home, now. Any further incidents of wife-keeping in pumpkin shells will be fully prosecuted by the law.6
In an interview later with Peter-Peter, the accused showed no remorse for his deeds. 7
"I'd do it again in a minute," he growled. 8
"It's a dam good place to keep a noisy wife!"9
(Article written by Four-and-twenty Blackbirds10
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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very good
They just don't know when they have it good. Once out of the shell there simply is no protection. Consider the shell-less turtle? There aren't any. We must learn from nature.
Peter for President.
Well written.
John -
This is a good one! I am really enjoying reading these entries. All of them are so funny.
Good luck in the contest! -
Wonderful
This was a completely awesome piece! I loved it
Can't say more on the comments as it may give away who's winning lol. But good job
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Bravo. I fully support all down-trodden nursery rhyme heroes, especially those named Peter or Jack.
(I agree with the 'fun' bit.) -
Sure, you're on his side! All you robots from Sector One have nothing but sympathy for macho dudes like Peter whatshisname.
Old Mother Hubbard mean? Why she was the soul of long-suffering patience and a full time volunteer at the S.P.C.A.
Pssst. (This is fun.) -
I'll bet the old woman that lives in a shoe was behind the outrage -- she's never cottoned to pumpkins, preferring the old button-type shoe for a domicile. And I swear she's the spitting image of Old Mother Hubbard who was so mean she had nothing in the cupboard.
Personally, I would have applauded Peter-Peter and perhaps bought him a drink after the symposium, but alas, that tale cannot be told.
Your tale, however, was sheer delight. Well told in modern perspective. LOL! -
Peter-Peter inciting a riot?? The disillusionment!! 
Who'da thunk it?
P.S.
Should be: "I keep Bessie in there all the time," he said, "and she never gives me any trouble." Sorry, hate to be a nag. -
that peter pan eh, always in trouble with the law. he still owes me a fiver.
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Hope the little old woman's kids didn't have athlete's foot.
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