Move Along

“She’s in this room, hon.”

I thanked the nurse with a forced smile and entered my sister’s room where she was lying on a bed, tubes and wires attached to her from all sides.

“Hey Katie,” I greeted my sister as I entered the room.

“Hey Rio.” Her voice was barely audible.

“How’s it going?” I asked, sitting on the chair next to her bed.

“Ok, I guess,” she said, the sides of her mouth curving up slightly into something resembling a smile, “I just feel like I’m… sinking.”

“Nonsense,” I murmured, holding tightly to her shaking cold hands, “You’ll be fine. You just have to move along. Even when you think all hope is gone. Move along.”

She gazed at me intently before saying, “Tonight could be the night when my life ends.”

I grasped her shaking hands tighter, noticing how cold and lifeless they felt. “When everything is wrong,” I said slowly, “we move along.”

“Even when all hope is gone?” She said in a small voice.

“All you’ve got to do is keep being strong.”

“Move along,” she whispered.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Jennywinnie
    March 6, 2007
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    This was a very good start. I want to know what happens next. Good luck in the contest


  • kkz2343
    February 25, 2007

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    This is really sad. And i won't cry either. I'm gonna move along.
    Are you sure this isn;t a song?
    THis was a wonderful story and i luvd it!!!!


  • Zalentine
    February 21, 2007

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    Wow, that was pretty good. I only slightly remember this song, but I still think this story was great. And very, very sad. But the way the characters speak the lyrics makes it too cool to be that sad. =D


  • Chronic Dragon
    February 21, 2007
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    This is nice, good job

  • Stephalicious
    February 20, 2007
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    hi!

    It was really sad, but extremely emotional!
    Describe the characters more.

    beginning: 5, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 5, dialog: 4, characters: 4.


  • Drac
    February 20, 2007

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    Very, very good!
    I don't think I have heard the song it's based on, but it was very well and emotionally written! Good job!

    beginning: 4, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 4.


  • ChorusQueen11
    February 20, 2007
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    this was really good I love this song and I loved this story GREAT JOB!

1 - 9 of 9