The Search For The Stupid Killer Person

Narrator steps out

Narrator: H-h- ...... HI! I'm the narrator. Bye.

Narrator exits


The Lame Party

Nikiya, Seth, and Issaih are standing in the center of the stage

Nikiya: Hi Seth! What are you doing here?
Seth: What'd you think I'm doing?
Nikiya: Issaih... what are you doing?
Issaih: This is a sin....this is a sin.....we are all going to Hell....I can feel it.
Seth: Dude...Izz....chill out with all that Christian mumbly it's going to your head.
Issaih: I beg of your pardon?

Ren and Juniper enter

Ren giggles: What are we talking about?
Juniper looking in her compact mirror: Doesn't anybody like, listen anymore? like, holy moly cow.

Kat and Rosco enter the circle of people

Kat: Somebody invited you?
Juniper: Look around, I'm the life of the party.

Kat looks around

Kat: Whatever.. if that's what you call it.
Seth: Welcome to the Jungle!
He says as the DJ puts on "Welcome to the Jungle" as Jay enters
Jay: Word.
Juniper: Then like, why did you like, come here.. if you like, didn't wanna.. like, come?
Kat: Sorry but I can't hear what you're saying with all the-
Rosco: Calm down.
Kat: Whatever.
Juniper: Oh, can't say "NO" to Rozz, can we?
Kat: Shut up, geez.

Clay enters the circle of people

Clay: Good evening, ladies.
Issaih: I'm melting!
Clay: .. and the civilized.. gentlemen?
Rosco: What is your problem, man.. lighten up.
Seth: He said something about sin earlier...whatever that is.
Jay: Word.
Issaih: It is a very bad thing....you all will be cursed for life. All of you! That's right I said all of you!
Ren clapping Kat's hands: YAY!
Rosco: C'mon Kat....stop acting like you're.. a guy.
Jay: Babe, you just got owned. Word.
Kat: Have you lost your mind? I thought you were supposed to be the smart one out of the bunch? Even the Mr. lead character of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat over here knows what to say to me.
Issaih: ALLELUJAH! PRAISE THE LORD!
Rosco: I guess you weren't there when we were electing people.. that went over to Ren a few days ago.
Ren: Ya know? I thought it was....ya know, I forgot what I was going to say....so I'm gonna ramble on and on until someone tells me to shut up like they normally do.. and.. and.. uhhh.. I like oranges! They are so... orange! hee hee hee hee!
Jay: Dude, this girl acts like the kinda girl I'd like to totally date.. dude. Word.
Juniper: You are like, forgetting that I'm standing right here.
Jay: ..And you are?
Kat twirls her hair: I'm Juniper Rock, class president, and oh yeah, the most snottiest girl in my class.
Juniper: you forgot cheerleader captain, steering committee, and also particularly annoying at certain occassions.
Kat: Oh yeah.. how could I forget?
Clay loosens his tie but tries to hide it as much as he can: This is too much for me. I'm going to get a nosebleed all over my new tuxedo suit.
Issaih: You all are condemed to hell!
Seth: Would you please shut up, man? I'm trying to party here.
Nikiya: Are we practicing abstinence? Remember sex leads to disease and then death! There aren't any drugs here are they? Hugs not drugs!
Jay: Dude, you forgot: "Make love, not war." Dude, that's my favorite saying.
Nikiya: I'll be right back. I have to get my purse. Can't leave my pepper spray!

Nikiya runs out the door.

Issaih: Now that there is an example of a good girl.

Nikiya comes back.

Jay: Dude. Too girly for me.
Clay: She's a nice girl. Don't make fun of nice girls.
Jay: Dude. Who brought you into the conversation?
Ren raising her hand: ME! ME! Oh, oh! Pick me!!! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE PICK ME!
Rosco: Ren..
Ren: What?
Kat: Oh good-
Issaih: God is upon us! My lord and savior.. he is upon us!
Kat: Yeah...
Clay: Miss Blue....may I speak with you?
Nikiya: Why yes, Clay you may...
Jay: This is a wacked party.
Seth and Jay: Word.
Clay: Nikiya will you-
Nikiya: Yes! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Clay: Okay I'm glad you don't mind that I'm gonna tie my shoe.
Nikiya: Oh, yes, Clay...that's great.
Jay: Dude, you guys are far too prim..
Seth: And proper. Wait.. what does "prim" mean?
Jay: I think it's like what my barber does.. when he cuts off a tiny bit of my mullet every few months.
Ren: BOO!
Nikiya: So are we...?

Jay to Ren: Dude, you're wierd.

Clay gets close to Nikiya: Are we... what?

Seth: Dude, so are we.

Nikiya: Like, going..

Kat screams: UGH! This party sucks!
Rosco: Why didn't you just stay home?
Kat: Because you pulled -- no dragged me here.
Rosco: Oh...yeah...sorry.
Issaih: I feel it coming on...it's coming....it's coming...it's...
Seth: it's got blonde hair and acts like he's God.
Issaih: Thank you for throwing me off.. he was upon me!
Ren: Hey guys....I...I ..uhh...nevermind.
Kat: That's a unique development.
Rosco: Kat...stop acting like a man.. you remind me of Joe Dirt..
Kat smoothing her "mullet": Well, I was born without the top of my skull and I guess a little bit of my brains was showin' and it was grossin' everybody out so my mom put this wig on me to cover it up and then the bones grew together and it got all infused and entwined. I mean I don't mean to get all scientific with you...
Rosco: Told you that you were a man.
Seth: You guys are meant for eachother so just shut up.
Jay: God...I think I'm getting a hangover.
Issaih: I'm not saving you so be quiet little boy.
Jay: little boy? I'm all man, dude!
Issaih: Oh, lord above...make this boy leave me alone.

Chloey enters

Chloey: Hi guys.
Jay: Oh...hey baby.
Chloey: You're wierd...

Chloey fixes her glasses

Chloey continuing: Hey Juniper, I can't figure out this problem for the life of me.

Chloey gets out her big fat Chemistry book and lays it on Junipers lap

Uh......nummmmmmber 25.
Juniper: Oh My $14,000 Richard Vivier shoes.
Chloey: You paid that much?
Juniper: I know a guy.
Chloey: Hey, I have to go to the bathroom. Come with?
Juniper: Yeah, I have to polish.
Ren: Uhh...I guess....uhh...I will..too!
Nikiya: I'll go too..
Jay: Dude, they were right about women going in groups to the bathroom.. maybe that's where I'll get the chicks. Worrrrrd.

Jay exits

Issaih: Oh lord above.....I call to you from the Earth..
Clay: Issaih, would you please not talk so loud...everyones starting to stare.
Issaih isn't listening: I pray that you will give me power to make everyone bow to me!
Clay: Issaih, that's a whole lot to ask for. I'd at least say please.
Issaih lays flat on the floor: HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH! PRAISE THE LORD!
Juniper: We're back.
Ren: Uhh....like, why is....he....uhh...like, on the floor?
Chloey: That's.. wierd.
Clay: He thinks he can get power to be God.
Chloey parts herself from the group: Very weird indeed.
Kat: Join the club....
Ren: This is uhhhh.... getting kind of...uhh...boring.
Chloey: Guess what I just found out?
Everyone: What?
Chloey: We just won a trip to Florida!
Issaih: Florida! Ooh. I have power on land and ocean! MWHAHA! I mean, yes. That sounds incredibly pleasant.
Ren: YEAH! Florida! YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!
Kat: Yeah...You never fail to make me feel like Hell do you?

The vacation!?!

Rosco: Look! There's the house!
the guide: No...this isn't your house...this is your house.

He then, hurries his sentences

It's the haunted house on the block....enjoy your month trip.
Ren: Isn't a month like, uh.. uh..two days?
Issaih: No...
Seth: It's five.
Ren: Oh...okay!
Seth: She is soo wierd....I can't believe she didn't know what a month is.... I can't even believe I knew what it was.
Ren: Chloey....I thought you said that we were going to Florida...
Juniper: Yeah, really....I don't see bright sunshine and beaches that I can tan on and pretty sand....and..
Chloey: There is!
Juniper and Ren: Where?
Juniper: I can't believe I spoke the same words as her.
Kat: Oh and guess what? You're breathing the same air as her too....ah!! And you're also walking on the same ground as her....and are on the same vacation.

Junioer starts to scream

Juniper: Oh my....I-I-I...I'm losing all of my popularity aren't I? It's waring off...no!!!!!
Ren: Like, uhh....do you still....uhh....nevermind.
Kat: I feel a need to completely strangle somehow and it isn't Ren this time.
Jay: You're one of those girls who doesn't shave their legs until their 20 aren't you?
Kat: And what if I am?
Jay: Word.
Rosco: Whoa...
Seth: Just remember...
Jay: Word.
Seth: That's not exactly what I was going to say.
Clay: My...
Jay: brain is getting smaller?
Clay: I...
Jay: Want you Jay?
Clay: You....
Jay: Are incredibly hott?
Issaih: I don't feel like this is very smart...
Juniper chewing on bubble gum: Who .. her?
Issaih: No...HALLELUJAH you are close...
Seth: I think he was talking about the house...you...
Juniper: Voluptuous babe?
Jay: I think he was going to say...
Seth: You're growing more and more unpopular by the second talking to me.
Juniper: This is far too much.

Juniper faints and Jay carries her to the door.

Seth: Cool.

They go up to the house. Rosco knocks on the door and Seth slams himself through the door.

Kat: That was manly. Wow, some introduction.
Clay: Yes sir or madam, that certainly is.
Rosco looking upstairs: It looks like there are five bedrooms.. that means we are getting in groups of two.
Seth: I'm with Issaih.
Issaih: I don't believe that shall work.
Rosco: Issaih you're with Ren, Jay you're with Juniper, Clay you're with Nikiya, and....uhh...Kat that leaves you with me.
Seth: Uhh...nuh-uh....you still have me and Chloey.
Chloey: I will strangle you if you leave me with goth boy.
Rosco: Then...uh...Chloey you can room with yourself...and Seth you can sleep on the couch.
Seth: That works.
Rosco: Let's settle into our rooms and then we can look around. The room are all over here...up the stairs and to the left.


Issaih and Ren's room


Issaih: So...Ren...I..
Ren: Like, I...I...uh...I forgot.
Issaih: Right...uhh...so...what'd you wanna do?
Ren: I...I...I...uh...purple...jello?
Issaih: That sounds interesting you...uhh...do..that...I think I'll just leave.

Issaih exits

Ren: Piece of cake!
Issaih: What?
Ren: With purple icing! YUMMY!

Issaih exits again

Ren: This is getting..soooo hard to do.


Jay and Juniper's room


Jay: So how'd you think our secret is going?
Juniper: Well, I guess it's alright. I look stunning don't I?

Jay: At least no one knows. Haha... word.

Jay runs his hands down her arms.

Juniper: Don't touch me and stop acting like such a mindless teenager. You know I hate that.
Jay: Well, hunny...for as long as we've been together for...
Juniper: Too...long.
Jay: What are you saying?
Juniper: Oh..that I love you and I can't live without you...uh-huh...uh-huh.
Jay: You're preppier than I thought.
Juniper: Well, that's great....I'm doing my job well then aren't I?

She continues putting on make up


Clay and Nikiya's room


Clay: So...Nikiya....
Nikiya: Yes...Clay?
Clay: How'd you think everything is going?
Nikiya: I don't know....I'm not sure yet.
Clay: I...can't help to notice that you look incredibly stunning today.
Nikiya: Why...thank you, Clay
Clay: You are very welcome.
Nikiya: You are a gentleman.
Clay: I try.
Nikiya: I think this will go very well...

Nikiya kisses Clay on the cheek.

Clay: Oh by the way, how's your dad?
Nikiya: Fine... why?
Clay: The cheeseburg--the yogurt is tasting extra yummy.
Nikiya: Oh Clay!


Seth and..."the couch"


Seth stands in the middle of the living room and listens for all the doors to shut. Seth, then, dances in front of the fish tank and sings "Everbody's doin' the fish...yeah yeah yeah" and then repeat once more then the song comes on. Then after the song finishes, Seth looks at the couch and sits on it.

Seth: So...couch how are you today?

Seth looks at the couch

Good...that's interesting...glad everything is going well...

Seth sits in silence.

Yeah...just sitting here with the couch...all alone...

Seth still sits in silence

I'm all alone....there's no one here...beside me...MY TROUBLES HAVE ALL GONE!

Everyone opens their doors

Everyone: Shut up!!!

Everyone closes their doors.

Seth: Well!


Chloey


Chloey: Stupid people.. I'll show them.

She walks down the hallway

Chloey: Yes... I certainly will.

She laughs maniacly

Everyone: SHUT UP!!

Chloey: Whatever!

Everyone closes their doors then, she laughs silently and goes back to her room.


Rosco and Kat's Room


Rosco: So...

Kat looks up from watching T.V.

Kat: Yeah?
Rosco: What'd you wanna do?
Kat: I don't care.

Rosco walks over to Kat.

Rosco: Anything?
Kat: Since when did you care? I'm a guy, remember? Joe Dirt.
Rosco: Uhh...Kat...I'm...I'm sorry...I just..
Kat: Yeah...I know...you don't have any "hott" girls to hit on...so you're just hitting on me.
Rosco: That's not what...
Kat: Whatever. I don't play like that Rosco.

She sits back on the floor and watches T.V. again.


Downstairs with Seth and the couch


Seth: 6 bottles of carton milk on the wall...6 bottles of carton milk....you...take one down....pass it around...5 bottles of carton milk on the wall....

Seth yawns and falls onto the couch. Suddenly, there is a loud crashing noise, Seth jumps up and there is a loud moaning noise followed by a person in black attire running around with a big (plastic) knife

Seth: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Everyone runs downstairs.

Jay: Dude.
Seth: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Rosco: Man, what's wrong?
Seth: A-A-AAAAAAAH!
Jay: Dude, what the hell is your problem?
Seth: First, there was this loud crashing noise...and I saw a killer looking person running that way with a knife looking object and there was this....moaning noise.

Everyone looks at him

Jay: Oh...uh...sorry that was me.
Seth: It was big and had a big black thing on it and yeah...
Rosco: Where'd it go?

Seth points to the back of the house.

Chloey: Toward the back of the house?
Seth: Yeah...
Rosco: Okay...let's split up: Chloey, Clay, and Nikiya you all go that way.... Seth, Kat, Jay, and Juniper come with me....and Issaih and Ren..you can go with them, too. Wait, where's Chloey?
Chloey running down the stairs: Hey guys.. sorry I was in the bathroom. What's going on?
Juniper: Oh, like, OMG.. goth kid saw a shadow or something.
Kat: This is sooo....incredibly juvenile...

The search for the stupid killer person

Rosco's group


Rosco: Seth, what did this thing look like?
Seth: Like....that!

Rosco's group turns to where Seth is pointing and its a picture of a rabbit.

Kat: You're..wierd.
Jay: Dude, that looks like you're mom!

Juniper looks at Jay.

but only she's ten times prettier. Word.
Rosco: I wonder what this killer person looked like.
Kat: Why do we have to go on this search for this stupid killer person?
Seth: Because I have to sleep on the couch and I don't want to have to wake up dead tomorrow.
Ren: But Seth.. uhm uhm.. if you were dead you wouldn't wake up.
Seth: I don't know what you're talking about.
Juniper: Ren is right...this is alittle ridiculous...oh my god...I agreed with Ren...this is just getting worse...OMG...there are cobwebs in my hair.
Jay: Chill out...rub a little dirt on it...you'll be aight.
Kat: This isn't what I call Florida.
Juniper: I want a suntan!
Jay: I want my mommy!

A groan is heard by Rosco's group.

Kat: What the-? What was that?
Seth: What was that?
Jay: Dude....It wasn't me....But I do know this dudes knife is looking pretty friendly.
Rosco: Jay, none of us has a knife.
Jay: This dude does.

Everyone looks and screams.

Chloey's group

Everyone around looks bored....except Ren.

Ren: If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!
Nikiya: Ren, would you freakin' shut up already?
Clay: Calm down Nikiya..
Ren: If you're happy and you know it-
Clay: Shut up, Ren. Please.

Ren goes in a corner.

Nikiya mocking Clay: Calm down, Clay..
Issaih: I'm getting a very bad feeling about all this.
Chloey: Somehow you never fail to tell us that.
Ren: At least no one tells you to shut up.
Chloey: At least I'm not incredibly annoying.
Ren: At least...uhh..penguin?

Chloey sighs

Clay: So....what are we gonna do about this killer roaming around?
Chloey: I don't know but things aren't looking so good.

Chloey goes into a room.

Clay: What'd you mean Chloey?

There is no answer

Chloey?

He looks around the room.

Hey...uhh...where'd Chloey go?

A scream is heard.

Chloey!

Ren: YEAH! Chloey's gone! Chloey's gone! LALALALALA!

Rosco's group runs into the room.

Kat: This is getting close to pointless.
Rosco: We saw it.
Ren: uhmm... uhmmm.. the killer?
Kat: No....the exterminator bunny rabbit.
Seth: They get me everytime.

Chloey comes around the corner

Ren: Geez! I thought everything was..uhh...bright and sunny...like..uhh..like the...like the...uhh...the sky!
Chloey under breath: I'll banish you.
Clay: There you are Chloey.
Chloey: I was just around the corner until I saw Mr. "I think I'm the world" with his girlfriend, goth man, the little kid, and Dolshe and Gabrana over there.
Juniper: Dolce and Gabbana. Humph.
Kat: Rosco has a girlfriend?

Everyone turns to look at Kat.

I am not his girlfriend!

Everyone randomly says "oh, whatever" or "you know you are." Then, everyone hears footsteps and loud breathing. Then, a loud scream is heard. Chloey locks the door.

Chloey: I saw it...
Seth: Saw what?

Everyone looks at Jay

One of them sea monkeys doing the polka?

Kat: That stupid killer person guy....you ba-..

Rosco looks at Kat.

bad man?
Jay: Dude, so where is it now?
Chloey: I don't know but it looks as if we don't have much longer to live.
Ren: Hopefully it's uhh...you! I pick you! Hehe...I'm bad.

Seth jumps in Rosco's arms.

Seth: I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die! MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!!
Rosco: You're not gonna die....we are all going to make it...let's just sleep here for the night and we'll wake up in the morning and everything will be fine and we can stay in peace with no killer lurking around.
Kat: Fine.
Everyone else: Fine...

everyone goes to sleep


All is calm....right?


Ren is up banging some pots and pans

Ren: Uhhhhhh... yeah! Good morning everybody! Rise and shine!
Seth: I'm awake! I'm awake!
Ren: Everyone bright sunny faces! No frowns! Come on everyone uhhh..rise and shine and look divine like...a...grape..vine?
Kat: I'm gonna lay right here...and not move...

Kat looks up and Ren is in her face.

I'm awake! I'm WIDE awake!

She rubs her eyes and smiles.

Rosco: Is it morning?
Chloey: Looks as if.
Issaih: I'm still feeling bad vibes from this house.
Kat: No one cares about your stupid "vibes."
Issaih: How dare you! God shall punish you by turning you into a....into a.....
Seth: Oompa loompa?
Rosco: Man, she already is one.
Kat: You're so hilarious....hahahaha
Seth: I thought you were funny.
Rosco: I guess that's all that really matters.

Juniper yawns.

Juniper: Is my hair a mess? Oh! I have to re-do my makeup...
Jay: I'm gonna go get some bo-log-na.. dang.. we're stuck here.
Nikiya: So...
Clay: Is everyone awake?
Ren: I'm awake...so that's all that yeah...uhh..that's all that matters!
Rosco: Yeah...everyones awake.
Kat: Hurray...
Issaih: I read once that sleeping is a sin.
Kat: Still...don't care.
Issaih: Watch your language.
Kat: What are you my mother?
Issaih: I'm your God so bow to me.
Kat: Dang, you're.. nevermind. Can't even express it into words.
Issaih: Didn't you hear me? I'm you're God....so friggin' bow to me before I punish you and make you a....
Seth: Fuzzy and cuddly gorilla?
Rosco: A nice sweet girl?
Chloey: Why don't we turn her into an alien?
Kat: Why don't we friggin' shut up and go on searching for this stupid killer person guy...you should watch...I'll be the one with the smile on my face.

She smiles

Jay: Dude, that's kinda sweet....no it's not...sorry.
Clay: I wonder if it's gone.
Ren: Well if uhh...if it's still here..I wanna run up and give it a great big hug!
Kat: Come on, Ren.

She grabs the ever-so-happy(and not to mention bouncy) Ren....and walks with the others. Everyone starts running around in clumps of two or three searching for the killer. While song: "Hashpipe" by: Weezer is playing

Ren: This house is kind of scary...but I wouldn't mind getting a hug...Issaih!
Issaih: Hi...

Seth goes in the back of the group

Seth: My couch!

He runs and kisses the couch then, a groan is heard.

Jay: Dude.. that wasn't me that time.
Seth: I remember the good ol' days....sleeping on the couch...all was calm....then I had to friggin' hear something.
Kat: You did didn't you?
Rosco: Okay...well since he did hear something...we have to figure out what it is and kill it before its too late.
Chloey: If you turn around that way you can do like in this video game I bought a few years ago....and I think I beat that game about 50 times...but it was still cool.
Juniper: Who brought the nerd along anyways?
Jay: Dude.
Seth: OO!! SHINY!
Kat: You're so counter-productive.
Seth: What does that mean?
Jay: I think they do it in Europe.
Seth: But what does it mean?
Terry: I think it means to produce kitchen counters.
Seth: Oh yeah! I've heard of that word before...I think my dad used to do that...but I'm not gonna get into that.
Jay: You're dad so.....

Juniper looks at him

liked cute little kitties. Aww. cute kitties.
Seth: He was a pretty cool dad....until he got abducted by those aliens a few years ago.
Rosco: Okay people we're getting off the subject here.
Kat: We've been off the subject for the past few days.
Rosco: One of these days I swear you will be girl.
Kat: You just wanna date me.
Rosco(silently): So?
Chloey: Okay now are we gonna find that freakin' killer or what?
Kat: Ya know why did we even begin callin' it a killer anyways? It hasn't killed one of us.
Issaih: Because it's dressed in black and it has a knife....
Seth(high-pitched and stupidly): And it wants to kill us.
Ren: You never know it might just wanna play a fun game....uhhhh..like ring around the rosy or twister.
Seth: YEAH!!! FUN!

They begin searching again and the lights go out.


4 hours later


Juniper: I'm getting so tired of searching.
Ren: I'm perky! I'm perky! I'm perky! WHOO!
Issaih: Calm yourself, child.

Another groan is heard then there are voices.

Voice 1: Help me! I'm dying!

Juniper screams.

Voice 2: AHHHHHHHHHHHH! Help me. Please... help me.
Kat: This is getting too wierd.

crashing noise is heard then, they see the killer: all dressed in black carrying a knife(of course) and looking like a killer and the killer spots them. They all run into a room. Chloey comes in from another direction as does Jay.

Jay: Dude.

Chloey locks the door.

Seth: I knew it! I'm gonna die!

Seth jumps into Rosco's arms again

Nikiya: Okay...everyone before we die...I have a secret.
Rosco: We are not going to die!
Clay: What would that be, dear Nikiya?
Nikiya: I'm a partier and I hate dresses!

Everyone gasps.

Clay: And I....I'm not really a gentleman...I really just wanted to work at McDonald's.

Nikiya slaps him.

Everyone: Ohh... denied.
Rosco: I....secretly am in love with Kat...and everyone...I'm not as brave as I look...my abs...they are fake.
Seth: NO!!!!!!!!!!

Kat looks at Seth and then begins talking.

Kat: I....secretly don't like hurting people...and I secretly am in love with you, too.

Kat and Rosco look at eachother and then, hold hands

Jay: Guys.....

Jay fake cries.

I... secretly don't have any secrets.
Juniper: and...I secretly don't like being popular.

Everyone looks at Juniper

and Jay and I....we are together.

Everyone laughs.

Kat: You really don't like being popular, do you?
Jay: What's that supposed to mean? Dude.
Issaih: Everyone...
Kat: Oh this should be good..don't tell me... you're secretly not as stupid as everyone thinks you are?

Everyone laughs

Issaih: No...but close...I'm secretly...a goth! Yes, like Seth. But I'm better.
Everyone: HUH?
Ren: 225. 789 over 4576.80.. yeah, oh, and you have to add the 7 minus the 2345.
Jay: Dude, where'd that come from?
Ren: I guess the jig is up.. I'm secretly very intelligent.. and Chloey, I just solved your Chemistry problem.

She puts on glasses

Kat: Intelligent? Right..
Seth: Everyone....I secretly like pink.
Rosco: That's funny.

Seth stands up.

Seth: And I....

Seth take out the stuffing in his shirt...and the wig off.

I'm a man! This is fun...who else has a secret?

Chloey comes out of the shadows.

Chloey: I do....you're all gonna think this is pretty funny...I bet you'll think it's the best one of all.
Ren: Really? What is it?

Chloey tells them to come closer.

Chloey: I'm the killer.

Everyone screams and runs out of the room and out of the house while Chloey laughs maniacly.

Chloey: Doesn't anyone wanna play with me? I have a shiny plastic knife!

Ren runs back in and takes it.

But.. Oh whatever.

Narrator: Uhmm.... that's the end of the play. I did a really good job, didn't I?
Juniper: Umm.. I like your shoes. Let's go out.
Narrator: You're popular. I don't like you. Hey Ren! Let's go out to McDonald's, baby.
Ren: Okay!
Juniper: I'm so .. unpopular! WHHHHHHHHHHHHY!?

Everyone: SHUT UP!

She exits