CHAPTER 1:1
“Slow day.”2
“Not a slow day.”3
“Then why are we doing nothing?"4
“Because its one in the afternoon.”5
“I drink at one! I drink before one.”6
“Well you’re special.”7
“Am I the only special person in the world? Other special should be here, ordering drinks! Chicks should be sitting at stools around us…flirting and twirling their hair or whatever they do--”8
“Whatever they do?" I snort. "Man, you're out of touch."9
“I’m in touch, I just don’t focus on their habits. Well not most habits.”10
I try to ignore him. But because we’ve known each other since diaperhood, I’m doomed to be his friend for the rest of my life. And that means being around him, and being around him implies that you listen to what he has to say, because he’s always talking. And listening to him talk requires replying because he is the most bizarre person you could ever meet.11
“You’re the one who’s never had a girlfriend, dude.”12
See? “I have a life, Brian.”13
“Yeah, and a life implies chicks, man.”14
“I’m not gonna stand around at a bar all day waiting for chicks to drop into my lap.”15
“I like that one. You’re making progress, Josh. I should get you a beer on the house or something.”16
I roll my eyes. “I should get you a beer somewhere else.”17
“Joshua! Brian! We’re closing the bar until we get some business. Section 5 is busy, go help Maxine.”18
“Finally,” Brian says, “something to do. I get to lose this apron and see Maxine all in one.”19
“The apron stays, idiot,” I snap.20
“Dude. What flew up your butt?”21
Some things Brian says don’t need to be replied too.22
“Come on, man. Maxine’s hot.”23
“Whatever, Brian.”24
Maxine is more than just hot. She's beautiful and determined and sexy and strong, and she can rock a pair of librarian's glasses and make them look good. She’s one of those deep people that have a goal and everyone knows they’re going to achieve it. I’d love to know what her goal is. I’d love to know she even knew there was a guy named Josh Peterson on staff at Fish N’ Chips.25
“Josh! Thank God. Table six, okay?” And she zips by with plates stacked up her arm, completely oblivious.26
I stand there with a stupid smile on my face until Brian passes me with a plate of food. “The bee went bye-bye,” he jokes, and then crashes into a pillar, dropping the plate and swearing.27
Things are looking up.
Author notes
This is my first story from a guys perspective. I have no expereience there so if its unreal please let me know. Guys or girls but esp guys (=
A contest entry
- Working the Counter by Mel-the-Believer.
185 points, ended March 15, 2007, 3 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - This is a little random... by Taylor Renee.
130 points, ended April 8, 2007, 97 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Fan Fiction that is funny really great!!!! by Brittneh.
275 points, ended March 30, 2007, 6 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrites (again) by potaytee.
150 points, ended December 27, 2007, 92 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Brotherly Love by Mel-the-Believer.
160 points, ended March 14, 2008, 9 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - r u a parking ticket? cuz you have FINE written all over you! by happy go lucky13.
175 points, ended March 21, 2008, 12 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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good job! I was really confused when 'I’d love to know she even knew there was a guy named Josh Peterson on staff at Fish N’ Chips.' i just was confused about that. good job and keep it up!
KEEP.WRITING.
-Melli<33 -
sweet, i like it
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Nice story, and it must have been hard to do it from a guys pint of view, brave, I guess. ^_^. I like the end when Brian crashes. Nice job!!!
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wow i rly liked this!!! u did great, esp from guys pov.i liked it a lot! good good good!! thanks so much 4 entering!! great read!!!
Tay <3 -
I'm going to enter "Working the counter" also but this will be a real life story
*smiles* -
Brave!
This is really good, and really brave - I'm writing a story from a little boy's perspective at the moment, and I'm finding that hard enough! To me this seems realistic, and I loved the laugh-out-loud final line. Keep going!
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this is relly good considering your going into ht e other genders perspective
i love it!!
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oh my gosh, this is great, bee! a little optomistic with the whole "she is so multifaceted" but, it's really cute. i'm totally getting pictures in my head. i even know a guy that has the face of Brian!
~m.h. -
i like it a lot
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LOVe IT!
Heyyyy... I like this one... It's actually quite realistic from the guys point of view. Everything sounds pretty real and yet it has a certain humor to it I can't explain. I really love it.. You have to write more to this...
<3
DuStBuNnI
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