So I've found a way to solve world peace. I've figured out that the entire human race would be at peace with one another, if only a bunch of aliens came and attacked us. Then we'd ban together and fight as one, and it'd be us against them and there'd be no more of this racial, political turmoil that we see now. I hear some people believe that we've communicated with aliens before, in ancient times, and if you translate the messages that they leave in the sand it's a reply to one we sent out. Which led me to this idea...
Interstellar Messaging! as provided by your local Yahoo carrier.
Us: (3 thousand years ago) Hey, what's up? ASL? I'm 14/f/Fl
Them: (3 thousand years later, which is about now) Oh. Sorry, AFK. I'm 15/m/Mars. What's Florida like?
years go by...and we never respond...
Them: BUZZ! Are you there? Hello? BUZZ!
more time passes...
Them: Hellooooo is anybody out there? Want to cyber? hehe.
A century flies by...
Them: That's it! You're being rude! Now I'm going to put you on ignore and tell all my friends to block you! *chain messages his friends that if you want to be cool, don't talk to the Earthlings. Immediately everyone puts them on the ignore list*
Us:...What's going on? Hello? Anyone? *sees their message* Crap.
a few more years later...
Us: *has changed screen names to Omicrons* Hey, what's up? We're from Omicron perceide 8, how ya doin'?
Them: Hey, what's up? This noobie called Earthlings is way uncool, put her on your blocked list.
Us: WTF?! That's way uncool, man. I mean, what did we do?
Them: What? Oh crap! *blocks*
Us: The user you are talking to has blocked you....crap
Us: Now what?
Earthlings 2: Now we go download some alien porn and jackoff in their faces.
The End. XD
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A contest entry
- My Contest, My Rules by EnemyOfAll.
250 points, ended December 9, 2007, 37 entries
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Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Lol, very funny stuff, quite inventive I must say. Good luck in the contest!
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you've got sentences starting without capitals which throws off the flow somewhat.
Enjoyable read without feeling forced. not sure about the way the dialogue is laid out though but otherwise it's still good. -
Haha, a very original and darkly amusing piece.
Well done
Ryan
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Hilarious!!!
This is toooo much. Who knows? It could happen! I like the 3 thousand and centruies replies as the IMs race through light years of space
BTW, I think it should be 'band together' instead of 'ban together', but that's a nitpicky thing. No crits whatsoever. Great!!!
beginning: 5, language: 4, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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Too Funny
I read this earlier and just had to come back to re-read and comment. Not only is it funny it is almost scary! Remember, scifi is only predictioing the future. Jules Verne was not that far off in some of his stuff. A funny read. Nice work.
beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 3.
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Lol I'm glad you enjoyed it enough to reread it and comment ><' I was mostly just fooling around....this is the kind of stuff I get when I'm talking to people. Lol I'm far too silly for anything I predict to come true. But yeah, lol, I'm really glad you liked it ^^
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Naughty little girl! Chuckles...
I was all set to give you a lecture on the necessity of conflict and competition as a natural 'human' way of life and evolution after I read the first part...
then...well...I just laughed all the way through the rest and tried to put together a picture of just who you are to write 'Aria', The Doll, The Puppet, and now this thing.
ah well, so much for my imagination, I have not a clue, now.
smiles...
amicus...
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LMAO!!! No wonder we haven't gotten any alien contact yet...
SORRY GUYS! XD
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