Rylings ~ humanoid with webbed feet, long thin arms, upward slanting eyes, flat nose with two slits, no visible ears, two slashes of ‘their’ color on cheeks. When they hit maturity two suction cups appear on the index finger and thumb of both hands. Suction cup are not strong enough to hold their weight. Each one has their own unique color.
Bowne (bow-knee) ~ food
coltays (cole-tays) ~ shoes
Coltelltraetin (Cole-tell-tray-tin) ~ lizard
Domaw (do-maw) ~ father
dovel (do-vell) ~ dress
Image-maker ~ TV
itonot (it-oh-not) ~ idiot
Kela (key-la) ~ friend
Lawto (law-too) ~ cup
Learay (lee-ray) ~ Village Elder Meno (me-no) ~ girl, lady Momaw (mo-maw) ~ mother Nebow (knee-bow) ~ water
Notay (no-tay) ~ brother Nomay (no-may) ~ boy Portal ~ door
raedo (ray-do) ~ pants
reato (ray-too) ~ cigar or cigarette
raevel (ray-vell) ~ shirt
Sonsa (sun-say) ~ cricket milk
Tolaw (too-law) ~ plate
veldo (vell-do) ~ skirt
Veldorae (vel-do-ray) ~ clothes
Wakela (way-key-la) ~ best friend
yestay (yes-tay) ~sister
Chapter Four
“Why am I cursed?” I muttered under my breath as I trudged through the dense vegetation that crowded the path leading towards the barrier where the ‘Giant’ had left the high barrier off slightly. With a malicious grin I pushed a spindly limb aside and let it slip through my long fingers quickly and heard a satisfying whack as it hit Pentop’s ugly face.
“Ouch!” he whined.
I laughed. It felt good to hear his pain. Not nice of me, but I was mad and I took it out on him.
“You should watch where you’re going then.” I threw over my shoulder. I had changed from my dovel into a light beige raevel and raedo. Both would keep me warm and hide me in the riot of color in the ‘Giants’ world if need be. I thought about coltays and shuddered. To not feel the ground beneath my feet would be torture, so they were bare.
It was a pleasant morning as we headed on our adventure. The ‘Giant’ had come early and left the mist on for a time and the moisture dripped off the broad leaves. The steady drip-drop had a calming effect on my tattered nerves. I inhaled deep taking in the fresh scent of damp earth and clean plants.
Pentop and I were equipped with one sturdy walking stick each, a satchel filled with bowne, and bottles of nebow and a strong cord, made of woven cricket antennae, for climbing high objects. I felt confident we had everything we needed.
I still didn’t understand why Pentop had to come. The Learay Dom Quince had sat back and looked at me from under lowered lashes after the others had filed out of his hut. He said in his most somber voice, that this was for my own safety.
I glared at him and I could feel my color slashes flashing deep purple. “Dom, you can’t be serious?” I jumped up, no longer able to sit still. “He’s the biggest bully in the village.”
He chuckled and that chuckle grated on my nerves. He actually laughed at me. “Forgive me meno, but you are being very silly. He only needs guidance.”
Helpless I stared at him. The faint smell of the raeto lingered around us and I could hear activity outside the portal. “Silly, I’m being silly? How do you know I can give him the guidance he needs? I’m barely able to keep myself out of trouble and now I have to watch this itonot.” I was angry and had balled my hands into fists.
I licked my lips and continued to pace from one side of the small room to the other. “You and the village heads have asked me to venture outside our barrier to find more crickets…”
“To find where they are. Not to find them and bring them back,” he interrupted. He was still silently laughing at me.
“And you want to send an emotionally challenged bully with me?” I was ranting at this time.
“That’s what it boils down to, yes.” He folded his long fingers together in front of him. He had stopped laughing and was gazing at me intently.
“Hey, would you stop already?” Pentop’s ever-changing voice brought me back to the present.
I sighed deeply and turned back to him. “What’s wrong now?”
He lumbered towards me, his face red, clashing with his lime colored slashes. “I should lead.” He squeaked.
“Why?”
He thought for a moment. I could clearly see the wheels turning in his brain and I imagined I could see smoke coming out the top of his head. I guess he came up with an answer because he said, “I’m the nomay.”
I couldn’t believe the arrogance of this nomay. “And who took you out yesterday afternoon?”
His face took on a blank stare. I threw up my hands and moved out of his way. No use arguing with someone as dense as Pentop.
He pushed past me and headed down the track. I stood for a moment shaking my head and I could feel the curls escaping from my ponytail. Defeated I stomped after him.
The trail beneath my feet was getting thinner and less worn. Patches of green grass poked up through the packed dirt. I was looking down at a clump when I ran into a solid object and fell on my tush.
“Humph,” it said.
When I had caught my breath I glanced up. Pentop had stopped without warning.
“Why did you stop?” I asked as I stood up and brushed myself off.
“Hungry, we eat.”
Oh great, he was reverting back to when we were water dwellers. I thought to myself.
As he passed out honey cakes and water I studied him closer. As I had noticed before he was quite muscular with broad shoulders. The raevel fit close to his body and showed bulky arms and a flat stomach leading down to a slim waist. He had chosen to wear baggy raedo’s, cut off at the knees, so I couldn’t tell about his legs. I wrinkled my nose in disgust. He wore tan coltrays.
He was concentrating on opening his nebow bottle and I watched his face. I watched as his chin jutted out as he grimaced when the cap wouldn’t turn. And how his slashes glowed as the frustration mounted, squinting his beady lime eyes. From the side they looked too close together. A sloping forehead over carefully trimmed eyebrows lead to close cropped lime hair.
“Will you give that here?” I snatched the bottle out of his meaty hands. I twisted off the lid and handed it back to him spilling some over the lip.
“Watch it,” he cursed.
I turned away quickly, afraid I would say something I would regret and stomped back to the rock I had been sitting on.
Around us a hush had fallen. The water had stopped further back along the path and the ground was dry beneath my feet. The mud that swished between my webbed toes had begun to dry and it started to itch.
The honey cake I popped in my mouth was superb. It was sweet with cinnamon sprinkled on top. It tasted as good as it smelled, like the deepest part of the forest; fresh, light but at the same time mysterious.
Pentop was still glaring at me as he sipped his nebow. I adverted my eyes and continued to eat.
Quick movements out of the corner of my eye made me jerk my head up. Out of the dense vegetation strode a large scaled creature.
“Pentop,” I screamed as I grabbed my walking stick I had lain at my feet. “Pentop,” I now said in a low calm voice, after I’d seen what was heading right for us. “Slowly grab your stick.”
Pentop turned only his head and gasped. Right behind him stood a Coltelltraetin. The huge scaled creature lumbered towards us, swishing its large spined head back and forth, scenting the air. Behind it an ocean blue tail flickered sending saplings and broad leaves spinning through the air. Spines stretched towards the high barrier, as heavily muscled legs propelled it forward. A tongue as fast as the ‘Giant’s’ light bursts flashed out of its ocean blue muzzle.
Slowly Pentop stood up in a crouched position and walked backwards towards me. Inch by inch, slowly and carefully raising his walking stick a little at a time until it was at his shoulder.
I glanced from the Coltelltraetin to Pentop’s stick. It was sharpened at the bottom unlike mine, which was blunt.
He stood in the same crouched position, for what seemed like ages, as the Coltelltraetin slowly stalked closer to us.
I’m not sure if it had seen us, but I was sure that it had our scent. I watched as it’s forked tongue flickered in and out and it’s head turned to us.
By this time Pentop had reached the rock I was hiding behind. I had gripped his arm tightly and could feel the tension pulsing under my fingertips. His back was pressed against me and I found it hard to focus on the danger in front of us.
I closed my eyes and thought about this creature stalking us. What had the legends said?
“Pentop, if we stay still it should leave us alone.” I whispered into the small hole on the side of his square head.
Out of the corner of he’s mouth he whispered back, “he can smell us. We’ve got to fight.”
I gripped his arm tighter and tried to get through his thick head. My slashes had become pale as I watched in horror as the Coltelltraetin ripped a stem out of the ground.
“No listen to me.” I gripped his arm hard to let him know I meant business. “Legend says that the Coltelltraetin have very bad eyesight. If we don’t move he won’t notice us.
Without taking his lime eyes off the scaly creature, “we fight and that is my final decision.”
“You are a complete itonot. We run, we run now!” I turned to leap into the bushes off the path, but a pink tongue snapped in front of my face ripping an old growth tree out.
“Ember,” screamed Pentop and I fell to the ground taking in a mouth full of decaying leaves. I turned my head to spit out the moldy tasting leaves and watched as Pentop’s stick jabbed into the fleshy under jaw.
The Coltelltraetin reared up, threw its head back and roared in pain. Pentop was dangling from his stick, feet kicking and turning around. The stick was still lodged in the creature’s throat.
It tossed its blue head back and forth trying to alleviate the pain and get rid of Pentop’s annoying stick.
“Ember, grab my legs and pull.” Pentop’s voice squeaked with fear and exhaustion. “I still need this stick.”
Getting up I hesitated. I could feel my heart beating franticly in my chest and it felt like I hadn’t had a drink of nebow in three days, but I had to help Pentop. Sweat had started to bead on my upper lip and forehead while I watched Pentop. It now started to run in my eyes.
Blinking away the sweat I took a deep breath, wiped my hands down my raedos and ran for Pentop’s feet.
Author notes
Edited 2/6/07
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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A DIFFERENT WORLD
Having read all four parts, I would now say that there is more understanding as you get into the story. There are also a lot more unanswered questions. This is a kids fantasy and kids are very accepting while adults want things to make sense. So for a kids fantasy I think it really has a great potential as the kids can have fun with the different words.
The one area I would re-look is dialogue. Just my opinion for 'contrast' I would make the narrative very clear and use proper grammar and then allow the characters to speak in a funny 'alien' type of way for effect.
What I see is a mixture through out and it is hard to tell if it was for effect or a mistake.
You are working on something unique so I think it is worth your efforts.
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Again thank you for reading and commenting. As of last night I have been revising alot of it. But anything you can give me would be great appreciated as stated before. And I will now look at your suggestions from this comment.
Thanks again.
~*Brooke*~
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