Heartache and Friendships - Chapter 1 - 12

The rain had been pouring all morning. Not one sight of the sun. Cadee sighed and rubbed her eyes. It was already 7:30, and she was going to be late. She wasn’t in the mood for going to school, but her mother would kill her if she missed a day, so with that, she got herself out of bed and looked at herself in the mirror.

“Argh” she managed to get out about her appearance and looked over at the clock again.

“I’m going to have to skip breakfast or I won’t make it on time” she thought to herself as she stripped off her t shirt and underwear before jumping in the semi-cold shower which was sure to wake her up. She ran her fingers through her hair to free any trapped soap bubbles still clinging to her hair and smiled. The only good thing about school had just popped into her mind, which caused her cheeky smile. Christian and Sarina; Her best friends. Christian was a surfer bloke. Mid length blonde hair, bright blue eyes and a tanned, toned body. She loved him for his caring nature and inability to stay made at her. Sarina was another story. She also had mid length hair, but was dyed black, she had brown eyes and a mischievous smile. She was skinny and when hugging her, Cadee often thought she would break her. She was beautiful, smart and always up for shopping. Christian often tagged along, but sighed when they entered a clothes store where the two girls would be lost for hours. At school they were the same. They were never apart from each other except classes. They had three out of six classes together so they still saw each other a lot. Cadee smiled as she applied her eyeliner and grabbed her schoolbag. Her mother had her pack it the night before, to make sure she had everything ready. Cadee never liked her mother. She’d rather be with her father and stepmother. They were awesome and let her out after dark. Her mother had never trusted her. ‘Your not going out now! It’s 5:30 at night! Any creep could take you and I’d never see you again’ her mother always said. Cadee often thought it was a good thing. To be without her real mother would be perfect. Nevertheless she was never aloud to spend the night at her fathers. He was irresponsible. Ha, cadee thought. I’d rather have a half safety wise, half irresponsible father over a overprotective mother any days.

Cadee smiled as she walked towards b block, her school bag slumped over one shoulder and her skirt shorter than the regulation length. Her earrings were far from what the school considered respectful but she’d take them out before care then put them back on afterwards, to get around a yellow slip. She’d end up with one by the end of the day but she didn’t care. I’m here to learn, not to be respectful she’d argue when a teacher was yelling at her. She walked towards her friends and smiled. Joshua was draped over the bars that stopped the students jumping off the side of the building, although they found ways to do it anyways. She realized she was staring when Sarina walked over and waved her hand in front of her face.

“Cadee are you on another planet already? School hasn’t even started yet”

“Huh? Sorry. Had a late night”

“A late night huh? Sam oh Sam harder” she mimicked which made cadee frown and sit down against the wall. Sarina sat down beside her and kissed her cheek.

“I was only joking babe”

“I know you were but…”

“But what? You and Sam didn’t??”

“Didn’t what??” cadee asked in confusion.

“Break up” Sarina whispered in her ear. Cadee frowned and looked over at Joshua.

“Yeah.. He had been seeing someone else anyways”

“What? I’ll rip his balls off. Nobody hurts my cadee” Sarina said in anger. Everybody looked at her and laughed.

“Did cadee get her heartbroken again? What did I tell you?” Joshua laughed. Cadee gave him the finger and smiled.

“You’d know a lot about breaking hearts wouldn’t you?” cadee said with remorse. She looked away and noticed all the year 8’s walking around, trying to find somewhere safe to sit.

“Whose heart are we breaking cause if it’s mine I want to keep it whole thanks” said Christian as he walked towards cadee and Sarina.

“Christian! That’s mean! Cadee and Sam broke up..”

“Again?” Christian asked in amazement “what’s different this time? They’ve been on and off for ages”

“He was seeing someone else!” cadee exclaimed causing everyone around the block to look over at the group. She smiled nervously and sniffed. Sarina put her arm around cadee and kissed her cheek again.

“Don’t worry cadee. We’ll find you someone hot, pretty, smart..”

“Sarina stop talking about yourself” Christian said from the sideline, causing everyone to laugh again.

“I was talking about myself! I’m not a superficial bitch”

“Well where, in this school, are you going to find a hot, pretty smart guy?” Christian said. Joshua frowned and looked at him in disgust.

“Hey! I’m hot, pretty and smart” Joshua mimicked in a gay voice. Christian looked back at him in disgust.

“Don’t be insulting” he spoke before looking back at cadee, waiting for an answer.

“Who says it must be a guy?” cadee said before biting her tongue. Christian sighed and lent over to talk to Tammy. She had tuned out from the conversation to talk to James who had just arrived. Cadee looked at Sarina and smiled. Sarina smiled back and wondered if she really meant it.

Chapter two

Sarina had told cadee she was bi a few months ago but she happened to forget to mention she had a crush on her as well. Every time she broke up with Sam she wished she could ask her out, but didn’t want to be the rebound partner, also she wasn’t sure if she had feelings for her also. She had never said anything about liking girls, so Sarina assumed she was straight. Christian threw a piece of paper at her in Maths, which normally meant he knew she was thinking about something.

“What are you thinking about?” read the note. Sarina laughed and wrote back.

“Who says I’m thinking?”

“I know when something’s in your head. Now stop stalling and explain”

After a while Christian smiled at her and handed back the note.

“I’ll talk to her, see if she’s straight and if she ever liked you, maybe she does, maybe she doesn’t. But I’m not writing again, you’ve distracted me from work”

Sarina smiled and slipped the note into her book before nudging cadee who was half asleep on her desk. The teacher, Ms Russell was heading towards her. Ms Russell wasn’t your ordinary teacher; she wore the most unusual, most unfashionable teacher that had ever studied to be a teacher, and then began teaching. Cadee often drew cartoon pictures of her in her notebook, which she was able to hide, but since she had fallen asleep whilst drawing one, Ms Russell caught her.

“Cadee wake up!” Ms Russell yelled in Cadee’s direction.

“Shit!” cadee exclaimed before blushing uncontrollably.

“Leave my class room immediately cadee. I’ll speak to you outside” she said a little more calmly, whilst gloating in the fact she had caught cadee drawing. Cadee stood against the bag racks and sighed. Her mother was sure to hear about this one. Then she’d be in trouble. Joshua walked past and handed cadee a note. She watched him walk down the corridor and down the stairs. She opened the note and read.

“What did you do this time? Your always getting in trouble.. Your really letting yourself go, aren’t you? I don’t want to see you like this cadez. It’s not you”

She laughed and shoved the note in her pocket just as Ms Russell appeared at the doorway looking furious.

“Cadee, I’m sick of you acting this way in my class. If you don’t care I would advise you to move to pre vocational Maths. Leave the spot for someone who cares about this subject”

“Ms, I’m shocked to think I’m a waste of time”

“I never said you were a waste of time cadee. You’re a waste of a space in this class. Now consider pre vocational Maths or I will ask Mr. barbarosa to change you himself”

“Is that a threat, ms?”

“Go back inside and be quiet. You will have a lot of homework as you have done nothing in this class”

Cadee shook her head and walked back into the classroom, slamming the door as she went. Ms Russell sighed and wondered how she ended up with someone as irresponsible as cadee in her class. She watched as cadee went straight back to doing nothing.

When the bell rang shortly after cadee shoved her book and pen in her bag and left as soon as she could. Sarina waited back to talk to Ms Russell about her grades so Christian and cadee continued on down to b block. Christian interrupted Cadee’s rant about how selfish Ms Russell was to quiz her on Sarina.

“Okay, you need to forget about ms Russell..” he trailed off. Cadee stopped talking and stared at the senior’s cars. “Hey, would you ever date a girl?”

“Yeah.. Why? Are you interested?” cadee said amusingly. Christian smiled sarcastically and continued.

“Well I think Sarina has a crush on you. Tammy and I have noticed it for sometime now. And we believe you like her back”

“Of course I do.. It’s taken until now to recall that”

“Well no, but I wasn’t sure..” Christian said as he gulped down about 6 mouthfuls of diet coke. Cadee grabbed the bottle off him and drank some herself.

“Well now you know, don’t you?’ she said as she stopped to wait for Sarina who was racing down to meet up with them. Cadee continued down to b block, holding Sarina’s hand and wondering whether she really did feel something for her or not.

Chapter three

When cadee got home she was shocked to see Adam sitting on her bed, reading through her diary and smiling. She stood watching him for a few minutes before he noticed her.

“Glad to see I’m noticed” she sighed before grabbing her diary from his hands.

“I was reading that.. I didn’t know you and Sam had sex every Saturday night when your parents weren’t home. How devilish of you cadee”

“You’ll get over it. What are you doing here anyways? I hope it wasn’t just to read my diary”

“Well I heard about your break up with Sam and I was concerned on how my fuck buddy was holding up. Is that all officer?”

Adam was the kind of guy your mother warned you about. When cadee had first met him he was doing speed, pot and ecstasy when he had the chance and smoking on top of that. He was often out of it or asleep. Cadee had changed him around and they were on and off. He had dyed black hair and brown eyes. She had always had feelings for him but never told Sam, he’d have Adam slaughtered in a matter of hours.

“That’s not all, I want something..” she managed to say before Adam was kissing her lips, teasing her all the same. He pulled away for a second to kiss her neck. Cadee knew it was wrong but she couldn’t care. She wanted Sam out off her mind and Adam was the only one who could do it. She moaned before he put his hands to her back, up her shirt and to her bra. His fingers worked such magic cadee thought, in a matter of seconds her bra was on the floor. He laid her back and slowly undid her school top, exposing her breasts. He ran his thumbs over her nipples until the stood to attention under his touch. She moaned again before he began biting her. She ran her fingers through his hair and pulled every time he bit harder. He looked her in the eye before kissing his way down, past her navel to her vagina. He kissed her a few times then began teasing her throbbing clit with his fingers. When she was lubricated enough he pushed one in before slowly licking her with his tongue. Cadee loved Adam for the fact that he didn’t want her to pleasure him; it was all about pleasuring her. She couldn’t hold onto her moans any longer as she felt her body twitch.

“Keep going.. Oh god, keep going”

She managed before she felt herself let go. He smiled at her before stripping off his boxers and looking over cadee, he entered her.

Cadee woke up the next morning with a pounding headache. She smiled at Adam before noticing she was going to have to skip breakfast again. He smiled as she ran to her cupboard in a towel trying to dry off her soaked hair.

“Mi amor, what a beautiful sight”

“I’m going to be late for school and if you don’t hurry step father will find you”

“Oh I could take him on” he smiled mischievously

“Get dressed” she said before throwing his clothes at him. He smiled and watched as she fixed her hair so it was perfect and applied her eyeliner. She was truly beautiful. He was half dressed when they both heard a car door.

“Shit!” cadee exclaimed whilst looking out the window. “He’s here.. Hopefully he goes in the shower so I can sneak you out..” she said in a worried tone. Adam kissed her before jumping into the top of her cupboard. Cadee closed the door as her stepfather stood in her doorway smiling.

“You better hurry up. You’ll be late” he said amusingly

“I’m about ready, I just have to grab my textbook”

“Okay, well hurry up. I’m going in the shower.. I want you gone by the time I’m out”

Cadee smiled and watched as he wandered into the bathroom. She quickly ran to her bed and grabbed her schoolbag before opening her cupboard again to let Adam out. He jumped down and kissed her before they ran down the hallway and out of the house.

“Now that was close” Adam said as he lit up a smoke. Cadee hit him and took the smoke off him before taking a drag. She handed it back and grabbed a hold of his hand. “How come your parents still don’t like me?”

“My father does. Mother well, first impressions are everything with her”

“Your mother is a bitch” he spat. She hit him and smiled.

“If you think I’m a bitch you should meet my mother” cadee replied before smiling. Adam kissed her at the lights near the high school and hugged her close.

“Don’t forget about me” he said as he kissed her again.

“How could I forget you Adam?” she kissed his cheek and then ran across the road. There was no traffic for once so he smiled and continued walking.

Cadee arrived at the same time that Christian did which meant she was at least a little bit late. The bell hadn’t gone but she was late in terms of talking before school.

“What did you do last night? You’re a mess” he smiled. “And you smell of smoke. You only have a smoke on the way to school when you’ve..”

“Leave it Christian” she said before they walked along the pavement at b block. He sighed as cadee jumped on Sarina, scaring her.

“Hey babe.. How are you?” Sarina said kissing cadee on the cheek. Christian smiled and winked.

“She’s had a smoke” said Joshua smiling.

“Can we leave this please?” cadee said frustrated. Joshua and Christian smiled but stopped. She seemed less eager to talk today. Something was wrong. Something must be wrong.

Chapter four..

Cadee’s phone went off in her pocket whilst she was half asleep in English class. Nobody calls her during class unless it’s an emergency. She called for the teacher, ms peters, and waited anxiously for her to approach her. Cadee stood up and walked over to ms peters and smiled.

“Ms, can I answer my phone, it has to be a emergency if their calling now” cadee said quickly. Ms peters smiled.

“Go quick” she said as she pointed to the door. Cadee ran out and answered her phone.

“Hello?”

“Cadee? Is that you?”

“Yes of course it is Sam.. What do you want? Why are you calling me now? I was in..”

“Shut up and listen! Your friend is in hospital”

“What friend?” cadee began to worry.

“Adam, had a drug overdose and tried to kill himself…” cadee dropped her phone and collapsed to the ground. Christian realized and ran out the door. “Cadee?? Cadee! Are you there??”

Sarina ran out accompanied by ms peters that sent one of the students to get the school nurse. Sarina picked up the mobile.

“What’s going on Sam?” Sarina asked.

“Her friend Adam, he had a drug overdose and tried to kill himself. He’s in hospital. Where’s cadee? Is she okay?”

“She’ll be at the hospital herself soon”

Cadee woke up to ambulance officers checking her pulse. She sat up abruptly and looked around for her mobile.

“Where’s my mobile! I have to talk to Sam!!” she screamed before looking to Sarina who was sitting beside her.

“Your friend pez is coming to pick you up and me and Christian are going with you to see Adam. Sam is going to want an explanation. There’s a lot of messages on Adams phone from you when you were with Sam”

“Shit..” cadee sighed. The ambulance officer smiled at her and helped her off the floor.

“You should be alright.. Just don’t go running around for the next day or two”

“Thank you. I have to get to the office” cadee spoke quickly before getting up to grab her bag. Christian chucked Sarina her bag and cadee hers.

“Come on.. Pez is here”

Cadee paced the waiting room. Nobody would tell her anything. Unless..

“Look!” she yelled at the nurse. “I’m his fiancée.. I must see him now” cadee began to cry again as Sam reached over and pulled her around.

“His fiancée? His fucking fiancée!”

“Language!” yelled the nurse. “Darling come with me, I’ll take you to him. Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

“Sorry I was so worried it slipped my mind.. Is he okay?”

“See for yourself” the nurse spoke as she stopped at a window. Cadee entered the room and almost broke down again. Adam had tubes and bandages right up his wrists. The doctor entered the room and sighed.

“Are you cadee?” the doctor sighed.

“Yes why?” cadee turned around, wondering how the doctor knew her name.

“Because I’m wondering what you did to cause this young lad here to carve your name into his arm”

Cadee froze in the spot and looked back at Adam.

“What have you done?” she screamed before collapsing to the floor once more.

Chapter five

Cadee awoke again in a hospital bed. She had a drip in her left wrist and Sarina and Christina holding onto her right hand together. She had to blink a few times before opening her eyes completely. She smiled at Sarina who lent in and hugged her tight.

“Babe! Are you all right? Adam was worried about you!”

“He’s awake?” cadee said quietly. Her throat was sore and her head was pounding.

“Yes.. The nurse said when you woke up we could go see him”

“Go get the nurse.. I need to see him” cadee said to Sarina who ran out the room as fast as possible. Christian looked at her and smiled.

“What did he say to you this morning?” he enquired. Cadee sighed and tried to remember.

“Don’t forget about me” she recalled and began to cry again. Christian looked at her and tried to cheer her up.

“It isn’t your fault. He found out about Sam”

“Shit..” cadee sighed as the nurse walked in.

“Let’s get that drip out of you so you can go and see your fiancée” spoke the nurse as she held Cadee’s wrist.

“Fiancée?” Christian and Sarina said in unison.

Cadee smiled which caused Sarina to smack her playfully on the arm.

After the nurse had taken the drip out and wrapped a bandage around her arm cadee was lead down the corridor with Christian and Sarina with her. They stopped outside Adams room and watched as a nurse checked his drip and made sure he was comfortable. When she exited the room she smiled at cadee. Cadee smiled back then stood in the doorway. Adam looked so pale. He still had a lot of tubes in him and his bandages were tinted pink.

“Mi amor?” he spoke weakly. Cadee smiled and walked over to him.

“Why??” she managed before starting to cry again. He moved his hand to hers and smiled.

“I didn’t know what I was doing. Sam persuaded me too. I didn’t know you were dating him at the time”

“Oh Adam…” she sighed before he put her hand to his mouth and kissed it.

“I’m staying with you until your better” cadee protested.

“Do you know how long they’ll keep me here?” he questioned. He sensed cadee had a plan as her smile went from sympathetic to mischievous.

“Your going to a private hospital..”

“Would that be your house?”

“Maybe, why wouldn’t my baby be aloud to?”

“What about your mother?” he asked concerned.

“Shit! I didn’t think about her”

“Your fathers. He likes me.. He has rights to see you doesn’t he?”

“Yes! Okay I’m going to pack my bags and run away to dads. If we turned up on his doorstep he’d take us in! Baby you’re a genius”

“Can you get the nurse. I’m going to say I need to go to my private hospital”

Cadee arrived home late to find her mother sitting at the kitchen table.

“And where have you been?” her mother asked coldly. Cadee smiled and went to walk away but her mother stood up.

“I asked where have you been!” she screamed before throwing her glass at cadee. She ducked just in time. The glass hit the wall behind her and smashed all over the floor. Cadee moved away and tried to run up the stairs to her room. Her mother stood at the bottom of the staircase and smiled.

“What’s wrong? Don’t want me to know you’ve been seeing that pathetic..”

“Don’t call him pathetic!” cadee screamed. Adam could hear them arguing from outside. Cadee had hidden him in the bushes so her mother wouldn’t see him. He hoped she was okay and not in too much trouble.

“He is pathetic! He had a drug overdose cadee! Can’t you see why I don’t want you near him! He’s ruining your repu..”

“My reputation? Don’t you mean yours? Ooo your daughters hanging around a drug addict. People are talking..” cadee was interrupted by her mothers fist smashing into her cheek bone. She stumbled backwards and screamed. Her mother exited the room and went back into the kitchen. Cadee ran up to her room and locked the door. She grabbed her suitcase from under her bed and threw as much clothes in it as possible. She grabbed everything she could and whistled out the window to get Adams attention. Tears streamed down her face as she threw the suitcase down to him. She made sure her mother was busy in the kitchen before she stepped out onto the roof, along past her sisters room and down onto the tree branches. When she landed in Adams arms he let her down and stared at her.

“She hit you?” he exclaimed. Cadee grabbed her suitcase and Adams hand.

“Let’s leave before she sees im gone”

cadee turned up on her fathers front door and knocked on the door. She waited patiently before the door opened.

“cadee? Adam? What?”

“Dad? Mum hit me” cadee managed to say before bursting into tears.

“That..” all the birds in the neighboring area screeched and flew from their positions as Cadee’s father took them both inside.

Chapter six

As cadee told her father how she ended up on his doorstep he noticed Adam was half asleep leaning on the table. Adam sat up straight and stretched before noticing her father smiling at him.

“Sorry, did I fall asleep sir?” Adam said sheepishly.

“I’m not that old, so don’t call me sir. Call me Paul” cadees father spoke joyfully. He called out for Miranda, cadees step mother to get some herbal tea. When she handed a cup to Adam he scrunched up his face from the smell.

“You only need a few cups, it will help your head and soul. Now cadee, I’m going to call the police station. Your mother cannot just hit you for seeing Adam here”

“She has no right to hit you at all” spoke Miranda who had now taken a seat next to cadee at the table. Cadee smiled and looked down at her stomach.

“Dad! You knocked her up!” cadee yelled, pretending to be mad. He threw a pillow at her and smiled back. “Ah, now you’ll have to tell the police that you hit me too” cadee laughed. Her father spoke on the phone while Miranda checked cadees cheek for her. She had been a nurse for a number of years before falling pregnant to Paul. He treated her right and made sure she had everything she ever wanted. Cadee had never seen her parents like this. Her mother was always stressed and irritable.

“Thank you officer” there was a pause. “Okay, see you soon” he put down the phone and took a seat again at the table.

“They will be here soon. They’re sending a car to your mothers to take her down to the station”

“Thank god!” Adam exclaimed with a mouth full of tea, which dribbled, down his chin and on his shirt. Miranda giggled and got up to grab a tea towel from the kitchen.

“How far along is she dad?” cadee asked concerned. Her step mum was fairly grown at the front. She looked like she was having twins which worried cadee. Her mother would go crazy after this and if she found out her father had gotten another woman pregnant, she’d get even worse.

“She’s got 3weeks, maybe 2” he sighed.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to budge in or..”

“Cadee” he put a reassuringly arm around her shoulders. “You’re my daughter and I’ve often wondered why you haven’t come to see me. Then, one day when I was out shopping with Miranda, your mother saw us. She swore that she’d never let you near me again. I was heart broken. Truly. I couldn’t stand anything for about 6 months”

“It’s true. Nobody knew what to do. He was a total mess”

“What changed?” cadee asked confused.

“You two turned up on my door step”

Cadee wandered out of the bathroom in a towel around her body. She was still partly wet, as she hadn’t dried herself properly. Her father was smiling at her when she got to the top of the stairs. There was a door to the left of her covered in band pictures, all emo bands. Avenged sevenfold, Panic!, Fallout boy, the list went on. Paul walked up the stairs and smiled.

“You want to meet Shaun? He’s your stepbrother. Miranda had him with her ex-husband. He’s kind of like you”

“What do you mean like me?”

“He’s quite, obnoxious.. Crazy..”

“I’m not obnoxious” cadee objected as the door opened. Shaun stood in shock at the girl standing before him. She had mid length blonde hair, beautiful blue eyes and the cutest little smile he’d ever seen.

“I’m not obnoxious Paul” he argued. Paul smiled and put his arm around cadee.

“This is my daughter cadee. I’ve spoke of her..”

“At every single dinner and every other moment possible.. I’m Shaun” he spoke as he lent forward and kissed her on the cheek. She automatically blushed and smiled. He had black hair long enough to cover his eyes, which were a grey/blue colour. He was wearing an avenged sevenfold black hoodie and black skinnies. Cadee was left breathless. How was she meant to stay here with this hot, gorgeous.. Wait! What was she thinking? He’s her brother. Well not literally, but he was a stepbrother.

“Glad to meet you” she smiled. Shaun noticed the glittering in her eyes and the redness in her cheeks.

“You have amazing eyes” he said happily. He wandered down stairs with her and Paul failing to notice she was still in a towel. As they entered the kitchen to grab a plate for dinner, cadee realized Adam was asleep at the table. She laughed and wandered over to him.

“Wakey wakey baby” she said before kissing his neck. Adam moaned and sat up and stretched again. “Dinner’s ready.. Then you can go and sleep. You need it”

“Right after we change those bandages and clean those wounds. We can’t have them getting infected” Miranda piped in. cadee smiled and sat next to Adam. Shaun walked over and sat beside her.

“Oh, where’s my manners..”

“We don’t have manners here” joked Shaun. Paul walked past and hit him over the head with a pillow.

“Oh, dad now your going to have to also explain why you hit him too” cadee smiled. Paul hit her again with the same pillow and Shaun looked at cadee.

“Who hit you? They should be killed” he spoke angrily. Cadee frowned and looked down.

“Her mother” sighed Paul. “We’ll explain everything after dinner. If you didn’t have your music up so loud you would have noticed there was something going on”

“I picked up the phone and realized you were on it so I was like argh”

“I was calling the police” Paul said sternly. Shaun seemed to slump in down in his seat and smile at cadee who was giggling at there little argument.

“Cadee, you were in the shower when the police called. They’re taking longer with your mother than they thought so they might not be here until morning. So I’m going to take a picture of that eye now so they can see the full extent of what occurred”

“Sure dad. Right after you address to Adams wrists”

“I’ll see to that” Miranda interrupted. Cadee had forgotten she was a nurse. Her mind was revolving around Shaun. He was cute, had a great sense of humour and it seemed as if he liked her.

After dinner Miranda took Adam into the bathroom and helped him out while Paul took his camera out and took a few photos of Cadees cheek. He made sure he got one from each angle to show all the markings and cuts.

“I can understand the bruising but why the cuts”

“oh, she threw a glass at the wall behind me. When I fell backwards I must have landed near it. I really don’t remember much”

“Well, she’s going to get it now. I want you to go sit outside with Shaun because I’m sure you can tell him what’s going on and why. Plus I see you’ve got a bit of lustful thoughts running through that mind”

“Dad!” cadee exclaimed, “I don’t have lustful thoughts. It’s merely a crush” she said defeated. Paul laughed and walked her to the back verandah and smiled.

“Go on you” he patted her bottom as she walked off.

“Dad you’ll..”

“I’ll explain it!” he said jokingly. She smiled and joined Shaun on the verandah. He put a comforting arm around her as she told him everything. When she had finished he turned her to face him. They stared at one another for a moment before Paul knocked on the door for them to come inside.

Chapter seven

“Cadee?” spoke a voice coming from the doorway. Cadee rubbed her eyes and smiled at her father. “Can you get dressed? The police officers are taking you and I up to school to speak with each of your teachers. Just to say why you’re not going to be at school for a while”

“Will they let me see my friends?” cadee asked worriedly. Her father smiled and winked. She couldn’t hold in her excitement.

“Shaun is actually going with us. You should be proud. He hasn’t gotten out of bed before midday in a while”

“I am dad. Really” she smiled.

“Sorry if I broke up your little..”

“Dad! It was just a moment”

“A moment I ruined.. But I’m glad I did”

“Why? We were just looking at each other.. Nothing more… nothing less”

“That’s why I’m glad” he said with a smile. He closed the door to let her get dressed so she could go up to her school. She found her pair of skinny jeans and her black top, which had rips at the front of it. She often wore a white singlet underneath it but today she wore a red one. She wasn’t trying to impress Shaun, but she was hoping she did. She quickly grabbed a random handbag and filled it with what she could before running down the stairs. Shaun was standing at the bottom, in complete awe. She sat on the bottom step to tie up her shoes as one of the officers came in the front door.

“I believe you are cadee” she spoke. “I’m officer bennet. I will be accompanying you to your high school today” she smiled as she helped cadee off the stairs. Cadee turned to Shaun and frowned.

“Where’s Adam?” she asked concerned. Shaun smiled and put an arm around her.

“He’s still asleep but Miranda is going to get him out of bed soon to change his bandages and clean his wrists” he said as they approached the police car. Shaun helped her into the backseat and closed the door after himself. As they drove towards the school he turned to her and whispered in her ear.

“So, is he your boyfriend?” his breath tickled her neck, which sent shivers down and back up Cadee’s spine. She turned to him and whispered back.

“Would you be jealous if he was?” she smiled. He looked at the school and smiled.

“Yes” he said sheepishly. Cadee stood in the schoolyard and frowned.

“Now, me and your father are going into the office to speak with your principal. You may go and see your friends but you need to be back in fifteen minutes. Okay?” spoke the officer. Cadee nodded and grabbed onto Shaun’s hand.

“You must come with me” she spoke as they walked behind c block, which lead the way to b block. As she turned the corner to where her friends sat Sarina jumped up and ran over, almost knocking Christian over.

“Jesus Christ!” he exclaimed before regaining his balance. “Were all happy to see Cadee Sarina but did you really need to jump on her?”

“Yes! I haven’t seen my girl in ages! Oh my god! What happened to your eye? And who’s this? Where have you been?” Sarina questioned. Cadee laughed and handed her a letter.

“This explains everything” cadee continued to laugh. Shaun put his arms around her and tickled her.

“What did you say about me huh?” he continued to tickle her as everyone stared in shock. Christian looked at cadee and smiled.

“Cadee, don’t be rude and don’t leave us wondering..”

“Oh, shit!” She sighed. “This is Shaun..”

“Her stepbrother. But uh were too close I guess” Shaun spoke as he pulled his arms from around her.

“Hey it’s not incest if your not exclusively related so fuck away” Christian joked. “By the way, where is Adam? What is going on cadee? Why are the police here?”

“God! Can’t you wait and read the letter after she’s done with it?” cadee said looking at Sarina who hadn’t heard a word she said.

“Huh?” she asked before reading again.

“The police, which are here to talk to my teachers as to why I’m not going to be around a week, which are standing behind me right now with my father because I’ve been longer than fifteen minutes…”

“You haven’t actually..” Paul spoke. He smiled at Sarina who was still engrossed in Cadee’s letter.

“Dad.. This is Christian, Sarina is reading my letter so intensively over there, Tammy, Joshua..”

“Joshua? I remember that name from your diary..”

“Dad when were you reading my diary? Wait how did you get in my room and steal it so secretly?”

“I didn’t..” he laughed.

“Shit” she sighed. She hugged Sarina and Christian before following the officer and her father towards the kitchens, which were in d block. Shaun held onto her hand tightly as they spoke to each one of her teachers. But when it came to talking to Ms Russell, cadee was worried. She was in class with Cadee’s actually class. Cadee smiled and Christian and Sarina before ms Russell noticed them at the door.

“Cadee. I was wondering where you’ve been. Who’d you have a fight with this time?” she said in stern tone.

“Could we please speak to you outside?” spoke officer bennet. Cadee secretly laughed as Ms Russell walked out of the door and spoke to the officer. Cadee quickly went inside to get her textbook and see Sarina.

“Ha nice work babes! I didn’t get to tell you, I’m dating Colin, from my work”

“Awesome” cadee said, trying to hide her disappointment. She had thought Sarina liked her. Cadee kissed Sarina on the cheek and walked out the classroom to find Shaun smiling at her.

“What are you smiling about?”

“I just realized something..” he said quietly.

“What?” cadee asked. She was interested into where this was going. Shaun lent closer and whispered in her ear.

“I think I like you” he said with a smile. Cadee lent in and kissed his cheek. He knew now she liked him too.

Chapter eight

Cadee arrived at her fathers to find Adam back in bed. Miranda kissed Paul before turning to cadee.

“He’s got to sleep off this overdose. Have you seen his wrists? There pretty bed but with care they’ll get better”

“I haven’t seen them, but I know one has my name..” cadee stopped. Shaun put his arms around her and smiled.

“Don’t worry darlin’, we’ll help you out. I’ll help you out” he said with a wink. Cadee walked upstairs to her room and threw her bag on the bed. She suddenly felt hands on her waist. She turned around to see Shaun smiling at her.

“Scared you, didn’t I?” he joked.

“What are you..?”

“Paul and mum have gone out. Your little fuck buddy is asleep..”

“Wait.. How do you know he’s my fuck buddy?”

“I read your diary” he said with a cheeky grin. Cadee frowned.

“How did you get my diary?”

“I didn’t” he said with a cheekier grin which sent cadee weak. He was too hot for words. But so was Adam. She didn’t know what to think. Before she knew it his lips were on hers. She kissed him back and rested her arms around his neck. He laid her on the bed and kissed her again before moving down to her neck. His fingers played with the bottom of her top. She couldn’t believe what she was doing. But, It wasn’t like she was seeing anyone. His fingers crept up to her bra and under, teasing her nipples, which were now erect under his touch. He smiled at her and pulled her up so he had better access to under her bra, which he intended on undoing. She kissed him again before he pushed her top up and kissed her nipples. Oh god this felt good. Better than Sam, but not as good as Adam. It was like he was exotic, never feeling this kind of love before.

When they ended up making love she was speechless. He kissed her as he entered her, smiling all the same. She dug her nails into his back, wanting more. When he climaxed he lay beside her exhausted.

“God I love you” he said trying to catch his breath. Cadee smiled.

“I love ya too” she said before he kissed her forehead. He heard his mum’s voice downstairs and jumped out of bed. He grabbed his clothes off the floor before peaking out the door.

“I’ll be back” he said, impersonating Arnold before running to his room.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Cadee sat on the back verandah still smiling after her time alone with Shaun. She still wasn’t feeling any better about Sarina going out with this guy from her part time job, but she had Shaun, and Adam. She knew Adam could tell she liked Shaun. As a matter of fact, everyone had caught on that she liked Shaun. She was awoken from her thoughts when her phone vibrated in her pocket. She quickly grabbed it and looked at the screen. Why was Christian calling?

“Christian? Why are you calling me?”

“Nice to know I’m loved… I wanted to see if you were all right. When Sarina told you she was with Colin you seemed really down”

“Well I thought she liked me. By the way Adam is okay. He’s just sleeping it off”

“Why are you so happy?” Christian spoke. Cadee smiled to herself.

“I’m sorry. I’ll be upset instead”

“You slept with Shaun. Didn’t you? I can’t smell the smoke but I can tell by your voice”

“I’m not that cheap, Christian”

“Did I say you were?”

“Basically! Look end of this discussion” cadee said through tears before she hung up. Shaun had heard the whole conversation. The joys of people using loudspeaker he thought. He had to go comfort her. He knocked on the screen door and opened it. Cadee looked around at him and smiled.

“What was that all about?” he spoke as he sat beside her and placed an arm around her body.

“My friend, Christian, he was being stupid”

“He must of said something horrible if your crying”

Shaun kissed her on the cheek and smiled, causing her to smile.

“He basically said I was cheap.. He guessed that I’d slept with you” she said as another tear slid down her cheek. He wiped it away before kissing her again. She smiled and stood up to look out over the neighboring houses. When Adam walked out onto the verandah to see her half asleep in his lap he knew he wouldn’t have her again for a while. He went back into the house and straight to the bathroom. He couldn’t understand why he had the sudden urge to dig a razorblade into his wrist; the pain seemed to calm his nerves. He found a old shaver in the cupboard and smashed it under his foot. When he pressed the blade to his skin he felt a sudden pain, then nothing. He lay on the floor of the bathroom in agony. He wasn’t dying, but he was in a lot of pain. When Miranda couldn’t get into the bathroom she called for Paul. Cadee knew something was wrong when she heard Miranda’s scream.

Chapter nine

Cadee ran into the bathroom. Miranda was leaning over Adam and Paul was searching for more bandages. Cadee held onto the doorframe as to not collapse. He couldn’t stand being without her. Miranda smiled up at cadee but she couldn’t smile back. Adam wouldn’t look at her and Shaun was just as shocked as her. The only thing she could do was run. She ran down the stairs and out of the front door. It was beginning to rain slightly but cadee couldn’t care less. She didn’t want to be in that house right now. Adam was mad at her, Shaun probably didn’t understand her, and her father and Miranda would be concerned. She stood in the middle of the road and screamed. If it hadn’t of been for her mother, she wouldn’t have ended up feeling like shit. When Shaun came down and put his arms around her she finally felt at ease. He held her close in the middle of the road for a while before Paul came down and spoke to them.

“Alright, you two up in the kitchen. Sit at the kitchen table”

“Why?” Shaun questioned. Cadee was thinking the same thing but didn’t want to be in any more trouble.

“Because I said so! Now get moving!” her father yelled. Cadee pulled away from Shaun and walked up towards the house. Paul held Shaun back and looked him in the eye.

“If you slept with my daughter and caused this outburst I’m going to kick your arse so bad. Now get up stairs and I don’t want to see you anywhere near her. Got it?”

“Yes sir” Shaun spoke before walking towards the house with Paul. He loved cadee; she was one of the only things that made him happy. Other than music and his mother, there wasn’t much. She understood him. She cared for him and didn’t care what anyone thought. He sat at the opposite end of the kitchen table and stared at a stain on the table. They had laughed when he did that. They had fun in the beginning. But now Paul was serious. It was Cadee’s mother. She had brought on all this stress and pain. As Paul entered the room he stared at cadee who had tears still sitting on her cheeks.

“Wipe the tears away cadee. Now are you going to be honest with me?”

“About what sir?” Shaun asked. Paul just looked over at him and then back at cadee.

“I was speaking to cadee, actually” Paul said sternly. Cadee shivered and ran her fingers though her hair.

“I’ve always been honest with you dad. And you should believe me when I say I didn’t sleep with Shaun. I can’t believe you think I’m that cheap too”

“Cadee! I didn’t say you were cheap. I just expected that you would tell me the truth. You could have at least hidden the condom”

“Shit” sighed cadee. Shaun stared at her and she stared back at him.

“You need to both not speak to each other. I don’t want to see you sitting on the verandah together. Your to act like brother and sister..”

“But were not brother and sister!” Shaun exclaimed, scaring cadee with his rage.

“Shaun this isn’t the time!” Paul yelled back. Shaun stood up, throwing his chair as he went. Paul walked over to him but Shaun just walked off, up the stairs and into his room. Cadee heard his door slam. She knew the urge to be with him would get the better of her. Paul sat down and put his head in his hands.

“Look, cadee..” Paul began but cadee was already leaving the room. He felt bad for yelling at them but they needed it. Cadee had Adam on the sideline for when she needed a good night. She was using him and abusing him. When cadee got to her room she found her mobile ringing on her bed. When she picked it up the familiar voice of Sam spoke on the other end.

“How your eye sweetheart?”

“What?” cadee was scared. How did he know?

“Your eye, you know the one your mother hit. When she was enraged after I told her where you had been and who you were engaged to”

“That was you?” cadee found herself full of rage.

“Oh yes baby. It was I. now when are we going to make up again? I miss our make up sex”

“Never!” cadee screamed into the phone before she threw it across the room. Adam could hear her yelling but was too weak to see what was going on. He didn’t know what came over him. Every time he saw her with another man he felt jealous, enraged. He didn’t want her with anyone else but he always preferred it.

Shaun turned his music up loud and screamed the lyrics in his head. Every line, every beat reminded him of cadee. He stood up and bashed his fists on the wall. He collapsed into a heap in the corner. He couldn’t handle Paul treating him like this. When cadee snuck into his room at midnight he was scared Paul would check her room and find her not there. When he found out about the phone call she had from Sam he was enraged again.

“If I ever meet him, I’m going to fucking kill that faggot!”

“Shaun stop it. Your going to get us caught”

“Sorry” he said sheepishly.

“Your forgiven” she said before kissing him. “Promise tomorrow you’ll stay home so I can sneak into your room”

“Promise. Now get back to bed. I’ll text you in a minute” he said before kissing her. She wandered over to her room and smiled. She wasn’t lonely, but she wasn’t obeying her father. He could have said no and left Adam and herself on the street. But he didn’t. She had been texting Shaun for a while when her father burst through her door.

“Cadee, I have to take Miranda to the hospital, her waters broke” he rushed back out and Adam stood in her doorway with some bags. “Stay away from Shaun while I’m gone or so help me I’ll kick your arse!” her father yelled as he rushed out the front door. Cadee ran up the stairs and jumped into Shaun’s arms.

“I love you cadee” he whispered.

“I love you Shaun” she whispered back.

Chapter ten

When Paul arrived home, he expected to find Shaun and cadee in the same room, either talking or doing something else, but he was pleasantly surprised. Cadee had just walked out of the bathroom and smiled at her father.

“Hey dad, how’s Miranda doing?” she said as she walked down the main stairs. He smiled and gave her a hug.

“Well we have a very beautiful baby girl. She’s got your eyes”

“And a name..?”

“Well, we haven’t got that far yet. We need the whole family’s approval so you and Shaun.. Where is he?” Paul questioned.

“I haven’t seen him yet this morning. He sleeps a lot remember daddy? You said so yourself”

“Yes. He does. I’ll go see him. You go get dressed”

“Okay daddy” cadee smiled and retreated to her room. She grabbed her black leggings, a black skirt and her ripped shirt out of her cupboard and quickly dried off her hair before pulling her clothes on. She could hear Paul and Shaun discussing baby names and she automatically smiled. They had finished their “session” as they liked to call it, just in time. Her father didn’t suspect a thing. Shaun understood that she’d have to be around Adam, perhaps even kiss him, but he still understood and would stick by her.

“Cadee.. Are you ready? I really don’t want to leave Adam and Miranda alone for hours”

“Why not? Adam is trustworthy” cadee spoke in his defense.

“I’m not worried about Adam, post birth is a very stressful time sweetie. Even if you have been through it before” Paul said and smiled at Shaun. He gave a cute little smile back then went back to fiddling with his zipper on his pants. Cadee walked down the stairs with her handbag on her shoulder and her notebook and pen in her hands. She never went anywhere without them, her notebook was where she wrote her poems when she didn’t have the computer to type it on.

“Okay, now you both know to be quiet..”

“Yes daddy. Were going to a hospital, were not going to run around screaming and yelling like two 5 year olds on crack”

“Im glad. I’ll leave you two at the front entrance while I go find a park. I trust you not to..”

“Dad!” cadee exclaimed.

“Sorry. I just don’t like to see Adam in that state cadee”

“I know daddy, I’m going to talk to him today” cadee smiled. She continued writing in her notebook until she looked out the window and saw the hospital coming into view. Her father glanced at her in the rear-view mirror and smiled.

“I must read some of your poetry someday soon cadee. I’ve heard it’s great from Miranda”

“I’m glad she praised me like that” cadee laughed. “Some of it is fictional some of it isn’t”

“Well I’ll read it one day this week. Now you two wait here. I’ll be a maximum of five minutes” her father said with a smile as they both got out of the car and waited. As Paul drove off Shaun winked at cadee and she gave him a hug.

“Just in time” she breathed in the smell of his deodorant and smiled again.

He kissed her on the forehead and moved away. They were both unsure of when her father would be back and they didn’t want to risk being seen. They had been standing around for a few minutes when Adam came out of the doors and smiled at the sight of cadee. She ran over and jumped into his arms, causing Shaun to frown jealously.

“Oh Adam.. I’m so sorry.. I just..”

“Shhh” Adam breathed into her neck. “I know you are. I just didn’t have control babes” he looked down at her eyes, which were full of crystal clear tears. “don’t cry mi amor, it was a mistake. I love you..”

Cadee stared at him and smiled back.

“I love you too Adam”

After leaving the hospital, Adam, cadee and Shaun all sat in the back seat of the car in silence. Cadee had a million thoughts swirling in her head. Was she only feeling lust towards Shaun? Or was she in love with him? Or.. or..?

“Cadee?” Paul spoke waking her from her thoughts. She shook her head and looked at her father. “Are you alright? You were awfully quiet”

“Yeah, just confused. That’s all”

“Well come inside and we’ll sit on the verandah and talk about it.. Okay?”

“Sure daddy” she smiled. Cadee got out of her fathers car and reached for her mobile phone, which was in her handbag. There were a million messages from Sarina. All about her new boyfriend Colin. She felt hurt at first, and then enraged which caused her to throw her phone on the floor of her room. She walked downstairs and sat on the verandah with her father.

“Alright missy, explain what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours” her father spoke as cadee lent her head on his shoulder.

“Dad, I just don’t know what to do or who to like. My bestfriend is in love with this guy but she likes me..”

“She?” her father smiled.

“Yes daddy, my best friend Sarina, anyways I like her too and every time she tells me about this boy I get enraged, like I want to hit something. Then Adam, I love Adam.. He’s perfect. And Shaun…”

“Shaun Is a troubled boy.. Sarina, well she’ll be over this guy soon and she’ll come back to you and Adam, he needs your love and attention darling. He loves you”

Cadee smiled as she heard The Kill by 30 Seconds To Mars begin wafting down the stairs from Shaun’s room. Her father smiled and looked her in the eyes.

“Would you mind telling me what that song is? It’s driving me crazy..”

“It’s The Kill, daddy. And I think it’s a rad song”

“A rad song hey? I like it but I hear it too much” her father smiled and gave her a hug. “go and see adam.” He said with a smile as she ran into the house and up the stairs. She found him with his head phones on, sitting and watching the stars twinkle. She ran over and spun the chair around and kissed him. She knew now the answer to all the questions in her head.

Chapter eleven

When Sarina called the next morning cadee was surprised. She normally just texted her until she answered.

“What’s going on?” Sarina said straightforward, causing cadee to wonder.

“What do you mean Sarina?”

“Well Sam came looking for you with a bunch of his friends. Saying that you had pissed him off or something”

“W-w-what?” cadee managed. She ran downstairs to find her father casually eating his toast.

“I’ll call you later Sarina” she said before hanging up and finding comfort in her fathers arms.

“I’ve fucked up daddy” she cried.

“What happened sweet heart? Who’s saying something?”

“My ex-boyfriend, he caused mum to go off, I told him to forget about make up sex now he’s looking for me. I can’t do anything right” she whimpered. Her father held her close.

“Don’t worry about them. This isn’t any of there business. And this Sam person, well if he ever touches my daughter he’ll never be seen again”

“Oh daddy, you’ve never met Sam”

“I hope I don’t have to” her father sighed and held his crying daughter until Adam and Shaun both appeared at the doorway. Cadee’s yelling had woken Shaun and Adam knew when something was wrong. They both approached them and consoled one another in a large group hug.

“What did he say?” Adam spoke into Cadee’s ear as they sat on the porch.

“Sarina called, Sam has been looking for me, with a large group of his mates. I don’t want to know what they’d do to me” she whimpered again. Adam held her and kissed her forehead. She was shaking, afraid of what they would do to her if they found her. He didn’t want her go in fear of losing her.

A few days had passed and Miranda was finally allowed home. They had agreed on calling her Faith. She had beautiful blue eyes and black hair. When Paul walked in to find Miranda smiling down at her daughter he walked over and put his hands around her.

“Hey you” Miranda spoke sweetly whilst still looking down over faith.

“She’s very beautiful darling. She has your hair”

“And your eyes. She’ll be very beautiful” Miranda spoke before kissing Paul, which soon lead to them making love. All the children of the house had gone for a walk to have some silence, which they didn’t exactly get.

Cadee had a hold of Adams hand when she noticed a familiar figure ahead of them. Shaun looked at where cadee was looking and feared the worst.

“Cadee.. Who is that?” both boys spoke as cadee stopped. Sam approached them with a glint of rage in his eyes.

“so now your fucking with two guys! It must be a tradition for you cadee” he spoke as he stood in front of her.

“as a matter of fact” she began. “shaun here is my brother. So I don’t think I’d be fucking him. And I was only seeing adam on the side because you were so fucking bad in bed” she screamed. He lent forward as his fist came into contact with her cheekbone, knocking her back onto the ground. Both Shaun and Adam walked over to him and smiled.

“I suppose we could do dads job for him” Shaun spoke as they both knocked him to the ground, their knuckles covered in blood. Cadee stood up to see her mother approaching also. She had told Sam where they were; she had set this all up.

“I hate you” cadee screamed. “You’re the worst fucking mother in the world! Go fuck off and die! Snort some more mum. It will leave you feeling high, maybe you can fuck Sam like you always wanted to!!!” cadee finished before running towards home. Adam and Shaun ran behind her, looking back to see her mother following them with something black in her hand.

“Oh shit..” Adam spoke as they quickly got to cadee and picked her up. When they burst through the door Paul was in the kitchen. They ran in and all collapsed onto the kitchen chairs. Paul looked at them and frowned.

“What..?” was all he managed as a knock on the door interrupted him. Faith was lying in a bouncer on the floor and Miranda was inches away from the front door, about to answer it.

“Nooo!” Cadee, Adam and Shaun all screamed out in terror, but it was no use. Paul ran to his lover, but it was hopeless. The bullet had clearly pierced her heart.

Chapter twelve

Paul held Miranda in his arms until the police arrived a few minutes later. After shooting Miranda, Cadee’s mother had turned the gun on herself. Cadee held a crying faith in her arms and tried not to cry. Had she caused all this? When Paul walked over to the three teenagers standing in complete shock they embraced in a group hug. Paul took faith from cadee and held her against his chest whilst whispering “daddies here” over and over. A police officer lead them all out onto the verandah and asked numerous questions which nobody was really in the mood to answer. They were all still in complete shock. Cadee walked over and took faith out of her father’s arms so he could have some time to think. She walked into the kitchen and looked for a bottle to feed faith but there were none. When cadee walked back outside Paul frowned.

“Miranda was breastfeeding” he sighed whilst a tear stained the side of his face. Cadee hugged him and kissed faith’s tiny little forehead. “There should be 2 bottles in the cupboard where we keep all the nappies and that, just incase”

Cadee walked inside and got permission from one of the officers to go upstairs. The female officer smiled and accompanied her.

“What a beautiful little girl” she said sweetly to faith. Cadee let a tear roll down her face. “How old is she?” the officer spoke whilst taking a hold of faith so cadee could find the bottles.

“4 days” cadee sighed. “Came out of hospital this morning”

“Uhh” the officer spoke. “And the lady..”

“Miranda, faiths mother. The other woman was my mother. I don’t classify her as anything anymore. Not after today”

“Faith, that’s a beautiful name for a beautiful little girl. Would you like some help to get that bottle prepared? I’ve had 4 daughters of my own”

“I’m fine…” cadee sighed.

When Paul sat at the kitchen table a week later he was surprised at how Shaun, Adam and cadee had reacted. Shaun had slumped into a deeper state of despair and only emerged from his room to eat or go to the bathroom. Cadee, how ever, had taken on Miranda’s responsibilities in regards to faith. Feeding her, bathing her and generally just watching over her while Adam helped Paul with the housework. He had all of Miranda’s funeral plans set, so now it was time to go and speak with Shaun. Try and get through to him. It was his mother after all, his only light.

“Shaun?” Paul spoke as he knocked on the door. He slightly opened it to see Shaun looking through his photo album; tears lingered in his eyes and on his cheeks. This had hit him hard. Shaun took off his headphones and wiped the tears from his eyes and cheeks.

“It’s alright to cry son” Paul said as he sat beside him. “I have been every night before I go to bed. Seeing you and cadee this way. And faith..”

“Every time you look at faith..”

“.. I see Miranda’s hair, and smile”

“It will get better dad” Shaun smiled through tears. Paul smiled back and hugged him.

“That’s the first time I’ve heard you call me dad”

“Well your all I have now, as well as cadee and Adam… they’re awesome!” he exclaimed. “Maybe me and cadee was all just a lot of lust..”

“You should tell her that. Don’t leave her hanging” Paul spoke before standing up. “Oh and be civil, please?”

“I will, don’t worry..” Shaun stood up and went looking for cadee. He had to say his feelings were lust, but his heart was screaming liar. He had overheard cadee talking to Adam; she said he was all she needed. That Shaun was just a lustful idea. That’s all he was. He’d lost his mother and the greatest girl he’d ever had. When he approached her in the kitchen she was singing a cute lullaby to faith that was almost asleep.

“Cadee?” Shaun spoke. His heart was still screaming, begging him to stop.

“Yeah what’s up?” cadee answered so casually.

“I-I need to talk to you” he stuttered. He always did this when he was nervous.

“What about?” Cadee’s mobile began ringing on the counter.

“Hold that thought..” cadee ran to her phone and answered it.

“Oh Sarina, come over right now. Cause I want to make sure your okay babe” there was a pause.

“Okay, see you then babe. Mwa to you too” cadee put the phone down and smiled at Shaun.

“She was dumped. But anyways what did you want?”

“I-I…I was thinking our relationship before was built on lust, sooo”

“So we should act more like brother and sister? Good. I was going to suggest the same thing actually” she smiled and gave him a hug. He hugged her tightly back and let her continue singing to faith. He walked upstairs to his room and slammed the door.

“Men” cadee said to faith. “You can’t live with them, and can’t live without them” she smiled then began singing again. When Sarina arrived cadee hugged her tightly and kissed her on the cheek.

“I was such a fool cadee” she whimpered.

“don’t worry, you’ve got me” cadee said with a smile. Sarina looked into her friends eyes and smiled before kissing her. Her tongue parted Cadee’s lips, which caused a smile to spread on Cadee’s face before she kissed back. When they pulled away paul began to clap.

“that was beautiful.. but seriously..” he burst out laughing. “I expected as much”

“daddy!”

“sorry sweetie. Now, I’m going to beat you by telling adam first” he said as he ran off. Cadee followed after him and Sarina was close behind.

“I’m going to get you!” cadee screamed out as she tripped on the stairs, laughing along with Sarina who tripped on her on the way up.

Shaun could hear the fun and excitement but had no intentions on joining in. he played around with his razorblade in his fingertips until they were covered with a scarlet flood.

“Sorry cadee…” he whispered before pushing in, twisting then clenching his fist in pain.

“I’ll always love you..”