I woke up this morning and got ready to go to school. I left the house then around 7 30 AM. My school was about a good fifteen blocks from my house but I loved to walk so that is just what I did. Walked to school.
I wasn't walking with anyone. Just by myself. After about ten minutes of walking, a car slowed down and drove at the pace of my walk. The guy inside said hey shortie why don't you come in my car for a second and have a little fun. I ignored him and kept on walking. I have to admit though, I was pretty scared. So anyways, I kept walking and the guy drove up down the block and pulled the car over. By the time I got up the block I was scared to death wondering why this car has stopped. Are they gonna try to get me? Or is that just where they are staying?
Well unfortunately, that car was waiting for me! It happened so quick. I was about to cross the strret until..BAP! Someone grabbed me from behind and forced me into their car. I started to scream but he muffled my screams by placing his cold hands over my mouth. Tears were rolling down my eyes. What would happen to me now?
Well I don't even need to tell you what happened next. You've probably figured it out. But if you didn't, he raped me. Oh yes he did. I tried to fight free but he was just too strong. Eventually after about an hour of doing things to me I don't want to mention, he let me go. Oh yea and also, he told me if I told anyone what happened, especially my parents and the cops, he would come after me and make me suffer a horrible death. That got me shooked up.
After the car pulled away, I ran home instead of to school. Ignoring his threat, I told my mom, who was cleaning the kitchen at the time. She was in tears after I told her my whole story, then she ran to the phone and contacted the police. The cops got over to my house around twenty five minuutes later, and asked me all type of questions. One question asked was did the guy use a condom. I said no. So after that they sent me to the hospital to get the dna of the man by the semen he left on me and to check out if i caught any STD from the man.
Thank to my dear God up there, I hadn't caught anything, but unfortunately they did tell my something that could ruin my life forever. They told me, 14 year old me, that I was pregnant. This was sad for me to hear. I was too young for this. What now? What about school? life? a great future? By now I was in tears. They told me that Icould consider abortion or adoption. I said no to the abortion because God would not want the life of an innocent unborn baby to be taken away. And I didn't consider adoption because who knows? this might be the only child I will ever have. So basically I was keeping this baby.
I was released from the hospital three hours later and my mom and I returned home. I went to take a long nap but was later on awakened by a horrible dream. The dream was about my rapist coming to get me for telling people. I was screaming in my sleep then my mom had to come and comfort me to tell me don't worry much about anything. God is watching over you and will not let anyone hurt you.
Weeks past by......No one came to get me. I felt a little more safe and relieved because of that. Probably because of my moms comforting words.
Then one day I was watching the news, and the picture of the rapist came up. They said that they have caught him and he was now locked away in jail. I thanked God that instant when I heard this. I now felt complete safeness and did not have to worry about any man coming to get me.
If you are wondering about what happened to this pregnancy, unfortunately and thankfully I had a miscarriage on the sixth month. I told myself that it was God's way of preventing my life to become a disaster.
Well now, I'm back at school and feeling great. Nothing stressing me out for the while. The man who threatened to kill me is behind bars and I have no child that I am carrying around everywhere I go.
Let this be an example to those who have faced the threats of death and suffered the experience of being raped. NEVER and I mean NEVER hide these things from people because it could lead to horrible consequences. What the girl did in this story by telling was right because it got the man locked up which would prevent him from doing this to other people. Even if they threaten you with your life, hopefully the cops will cath the predator before anything horrible happens.
- Writing Whatever group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Some Options. Dark, But Meaningful. Come and Enter. by xxRainbowDawnxx.
100 points, ended February 24, 2007, 17 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think. I entered this piece in a contest and I would like your opinions on how you felt on the story and what parts sounded a tad akward or something. Thank you!
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
-
Wow.
I had no idea that that had happened to anyone else. It happened to me three times.
God rewarded your bravery (if that was really you in the story)
^^
Midnight.
-
Great piece of writing. Rape is a hard thing to deal with, espeically if it has happened to you. It has happened to me twice by the same person and I hope that it really didn't happen to you.
Take care.
October -
This is a great piece of writing but I think it could be improved. It would flow better if it wasn't moving as fast as it is currently and a bit of a description of the wake, either emotion/physical or both. Another thing I'ld like to point out is that they wouldn't be able to find out if her was pregnant yet or not. It takes approx. 2 weeks for you to be able to truly tell with confidence if someone is pregnant and even then you may not be able to hold the child.
Overall, it does a good plot and morale to the story. Good work.
-
This is a very interesting read...though the pregnancy thing is a little on the stretchy side, otherwise...it was really good!
-
the only part that was awkward or wrong was that it would have been physically impossible to tell if she was pregnant the day it happened. emotionally, it was lacking a bit, in the sense that the majority of rape victims, and those who have had miscarriages, have to deal with it for the rest lives. and at 14, it is a confronting, if not unbelievable thing to even comprehend dealing with. it was though, incredibly good for you to get it out there, perhaps even inspirational to those who have experienced it, but more detail and depth would go a long way. keep it going though, it has amazing potential!
-
I agree with lyneun
The story was a good one, and definately had a good ending, but it did seem very much like the character was boasting toward the middle, almost like she was glad it happened for some strange reason. I guess this can be prevented by taking a break from the main character's feelings and stating class-mate's reactions.
Another thing that would have given this story a better impact, though it was relatively strong as is, would have been to work a little further into the grammar. It's somewhat evident that, from the start, this story was written in a hurried fashion. I guess that's just because of the lacking comma's and fragmented sentences. Work on those things and you'd be an excellent writer.
Oh yeah...quotation marks, too...
Rape is definately hard to deal with, and even more definately one of my personal "pet peeves" (assuming the term even remotely fits here).
Signed,
Forlornbeginning: 1, language: 2, plot: 3, ending: 3, dialog: 1, characters: 2.
-
i feel in love with this because one of my friend was just raped one week ago and she will not tell anybody because she is a shamed i told her she had no reason to be ashamed but she said she can't tell any one but me so keep this up i love it very much thanks for letting me read this keep it up girl
-
....omg
Not alot of story really get to me the way this one did. Honesty I don't care about anything gramatical in this story, it doesn't matter. This was a very amazing story. I don't know what all to say I'm still just blown away by it.
-
An interesting feel good story. Not my type. It seemed near the middle that the main character was boasting. Not sure if that's the image you wanted to portray. If people are moved by this, good for them.
-
*sniff
WOW!! This is great stuff, I'm near tears. I applaud you. Rape and abuse is a hard thing to write about, but you did it and did it well and gave a good message.
-
Oh my gosh
Wow, that was unbelieveable. This story was awesome, and sent a really good message out to girls who have been through this.
-
Another good story, with a good moral. That is great advice for people who had to go through that kind of hell. Good job!
Adding your comment:
1 - 12 of 12
