Memories

I hear my father’s coarse voice calling out my name.
A good sign that he always loved his two boys.

I was the one that slept in the most and needed that voice that would prompt anyone to take notice.
He was hard working man of small stature that when he was not working his hobbies included what I call work.

That same voice I have heard other times before when I’m many miles away. He taught us well to defend ourselves and such and put in a good hard days work for things we will get.

Taught us well how life can be unkind at times and we must be prepared.
These things I carry with me always so many years later for they were advice of one who lost his father when he was thirteen
years of age and lost his mother at birth which carved his future thoughts.

At times as a teen I could not understand his ways and methods of priorities of the day, but being a good son I tried to comply.
He was there for me whenever life got tough and always would be
no matter how I scorned. He knew I was young and hot tempered too and followed him like a shadow where ever he would go.

I did not realize the pain of father time and the toll it takes on us all, but watching his strength dimimish was a very positive sign that I would have to take his place in running things the way
he’d want it done.

He lay in his hospital bed trying to get some air for his lung has pneumonia as several times before.
This time I slept a night of worry for the man that was my hero since my time had begun.

Images of a frail man as he’s skin and bones to me knowing of his strength as a young man always on the go.
Bring to me my father’s health and keep him here with me, I’m not sure I’m ready for him to rest in peace.

I know this sounds selfish when a man is getting close to crossing over at eighty three to the home where he should be.
But he is a fighter and may surprise us all yet.
For in his mind his goals yet to be met are awaiting him at home where he wants get to.

I fell asleep for a while and felt he would be all right until I heard him calling me as though he said good bye.

I was up the rest of the night thinking of his many dedicated years and when the phone rang in his room and there was no answer. My blood ran cold and my mind could not comprehend that this may of been his time.

I visited the Hospital to see what I would find and there he was just eating himself blind. A big good morning smile from under the oxygen mask and he looked as good as new.

He can’t come home yet, they are concerned for his state of well being to stay until he is completely free of the monster that attacks him at any given time. He talks and jokes as he always did before even with the mask feeding oxygen to him will never get him down.

I look to see a feather light man of gold with friends in every corner of the world sitting in his bed spending time with me once more as though never to have an end.

This is all new to me since no one else has died in our family when mom & dad passed their sixtieth anniversary.

Give me strength my Lord for day is nearing and will need it so.