Jennifer and Mattie’s Apartment
North of Union Station
10:25 pm local
It was getting late and Harm knew it was time he and Mac left so his new neighbors could go to bed. Mattie being one of the new neighbors, and Hrm her guardian, he knew they had to leave. It was Friday, and being that they didn’t have to work tomorrow, Harm thought he would invite Mac over for a cup of tea, and maybe some casual conversation before she went home.
Things were still a little strained between them since their return from Paraguay, and each had turned down invitations from the other several times in the last few months. Harm was hoping that this time she would accept his invitation for tea.
“Hey Mac, if you're free how about some tea with a good looking sailor?” Harm asked after they closed the door to Jennifer and Mattie’s apartment.
“Well Flyboy, just point him out and I’ll let you know”, she replied with a smile that went from ear to ear.
“Cute Marine. You know what I mean. What do you say?” he asked again with a look that could only be described as one of someone who was totally lost.
After what seemed forever to Harm, Mac answered “Sure Harm I’d love to have tea with you.” Harm unlocked the door to his apartment and fully opened it to allow Mac to enter. “Have a seat Mac, I’ll put the water on.”
Harm handed Mac her tea and they both relaxed in the living room on the couch. There was an uneasy silence between them, and after Harm took a few sips of his tea he decided it was time to say something.
“So Mac, how has things been going with you these days?” he asked, careful not to say what he really wanted to know.
Mac took another sip of her tea before she answered him. “Actually things have been really quiet lately.” She too being careful as to what she said. She knew that the mention of a certain CIA agent would put Harm on the defense, and he would put up more walls between them, walls that their friendship didn’t need.
“Really Mac? Somehow quiet doesn’t seem to be a word I would use to describe your life.” Harm said without realizing he had said it. And just as soon as he heard it he quickly put his cup on the table and reached out for Mac’s had and tried to apologize to her.
“Oh Mac. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I said that out loud. I guess my brain had a temporary shut down and my mouth took advantage of it. I’m sorry. Really sorry.” Harm was now on the floor on one knee in front of her, looking into the eyes of his marine, when he reached up and placed a gentle hand on her cheek as a lone tear feel to his waiting hand.
“Oh Mac, I didn’t want to make you cry. I don’t know why I always do this to us. I run my mouth without engaging my brain first. Please forgive me Mac. I’ll try to better about things, just please don’t be mad at me.”
Mac looked down at the man who was still on his knees in front of her as she reached out her hand and placed her hand on his cheek and likewise she caught a lone tear that fell from her sailors eye.
Mac spoke so softly as she looked into his eyes as she spoke to him,
“Harm is this what we’re going to do to each other for the rest of friendship? Are we going to make each other cry and hurt each other every time we’re alone? I don’t think this is what I want for us Harm. You are too important to me.”
“You are important to me as well Mac. I guess you could say you are the most important person in my life.” Harm moved his hand from her cheek and placed both her hands in his large masculine ones, and looked upon their hands tightly holding on the other. “Mac I don’t want to lose you to something or someone else. I don’t think I can watch that happen again.”
As she heard his words Mac wasn’t all to clear on what he was trying to say to her, so she asked him to just say what he felt and not to be afraid of the words.
He looked at her, released her hands, and quickly got up and went to the large window and looked out. He knew he couldn’t face her at the moment because he felt his walls crumbling, and he was afraid what he wanted to say to her would make her leave, and he didn’t want that most of all.
“Harm, please tell me what it is that’s bothering you. There is something that you want to tell me isn’t there?”, she asked as she followed Harm to the window and stood behind him, her arms gently placed on his large muscular arms. ”Please Harm talk to me”, she pleaded.
“I can’t Mac. If I say what I want you to hear, I’m afraid you’ll walk out of my life again, and this time it will be forever, and I couldn’t live with that. …Without you.”
Harm’s words were the softest and sweetest words she had ever heard him say, and she knew he was speaking from his heart, something Harm almost never did. Now she knew she had to tell him something she wanted him to know as well, and she knew she had to tell him now so he would know he would not lose her.
“Harm you will never lose me. You are a part of my life, you are the best part of my life, and you will never be without me. Never Harm….Never.”
Harm hearing her words slowly turned around and put his arms around her. “I think this is where I say….. I love You”, Harm lightly whispered into her ear, followed by a lightly placed kiss on her temple.
Mac lifted her head and looked into his ocean blue eyes and spoke the words he had waited years to hear…..”I love you too Harm. I have from the very beginning and I’ll love till the very end.”
Slowly both drew closer and finally shared their first kiss together. At least this was their first one since both admitted they true feelings. When the kiss ended both sat on the couch and enjoyed holding the one they loved.
Mac had laid her head on Harm’s chest as he placed his arm around her shoulders. He pulled her close and leaned his head on hers. The couple stayed this way for several minutes before either of them spoke. Then it was Mac who broke the silence. “Harm, what do you think made us take so long to admit how we felt about each other, and I’m not talking about our jobs. What is it about love, that we were afraid to admit it to each other?"
“I don’t know Mac. I’ve known that I’ve loved you since the day I saw you in the Rose Garden. You were the only real Rose there. Maybe I was afraid you would not feel the same way about me. You are a beautiful and amazing woman Mac, what could you see in a pilot turned lawyer.”
“Harm when I look at you I don’t see a pilot or a lawyer. I see a man, a very good and descent man that any woman would be proud to call her own. I’ve known men that said they loved me, and then tried to change me into what they wanted me to be, or tried to change my job. That’s not love Harm. With you, love is different. You didn’t try to change me or anything about me. You accepted me for who I was, for who I am. That’s love Harm. Real love and I’m grateful to you for it.” As Mac finished she put her arm around his waist and closed her eyes and took in the scent the was Harmon Rabb.
“You know Mac, my mom’s going to thrilled about us. Whenever I talk to her she asks about you and she always says, “She’s quite the girl”, but she is wrong Mac. She should have said you are “quite the woman”, and you are Mac, all woman, a very beautiful woman, and I love you.”
Harm put his finger under Mac’s chin and lifted up her head slightly and gave her a gentle kiss on the lips. When the two parted they held each other for what seemed like minutes but actually it was several hours. When the couple realized the hour Mac got up to go but Harm stopped her. “Mac please don’t leave. Stay the rest of the night. We don’t have to work tomorrow and I want to hold you in my arms and feel your warmth beside me. I promise I won’t ask for any thing more. Please Mac, say you’ll stay.”
“Thanks Harm I don’t want to go home either. But what do you think the girls would say if they see me in the morning”, she replied with a grin on her face.
“I don’t care what they say. They will probably say it’s about time I got my head out of my six. I just don’t want you to go. Please stay”, he pleaded while he rubbed his hands across her back and shoulders.
“Sure Harm, I’ll stay. I know I can trust you”, she answered, while enjoying the feel of his arms and hands on her body.
Then together they turned and started off to his bedroom where the two shared a night of blissful sleep. Never had the people found such contentment as they did that night in the arms of the one they loved. Never had they found such love.
The beginning
Author notes
DISCLAIMER-I don’t own the characters, I’m just borrowing them for a little entertainment. They belong to DPB, and I’ll return them where I found them when I’m done.
SPOILERS-Every episode that has Harm and Mac and their UST.
SUMMARY-Harm and Mac discuss LOVE. Story starts where A Girl’s Best Friend ended.
FEEDBACK-always appreciated
NOTE- Written January 11, 2004. Roberta this ones for you.
A contest entry
- Impress me! by QueenWolf.
350 points, ended January 14, 2007, 14 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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never really watched JAG but this was a good story none the less.. it was emotional
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NO JAGis good JAG
I did not really enjoy your story, but i guess that fans of Jag will love this! Keep up the good work -
ok i agree with matt...i also think that the story was emotional and good. i like the way you wrote the story and i think that you did a great jpb on it. good luck in the contests....hope you do good.
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the story was really emotional and i think it was alright. good job!
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Never seen JAG, but I liked the story!
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interesting
never seen the show but this was a real good story. a little more discription of the backround (meaning what the house looks like) and stuff would be nice but you are a wonderfull writer. Hi rating for you! YAY!
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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Been a while since I watched Jag. Eesh. I don't remember much of it, but I did remember this complication. Ha. Somehow, the dialogue didn't become the characters. It just didn't...seem like them. Eh? Not one for fanfictions, this one was alright, not completely unrealistic like some of them are, and for that, I applaud you.
-Ethan -
Okay so based on the other comments, I gather that Jag (or JAG) is a tv show. Based on the story, I deduce that it is a soap opera of sorts.
Two questions: is Marine her name or her profession? And what does "get my head out of my six" mean? -
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Marine is the Navy, and "get my had out of my six" means he has to pull his head out of his ass.
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Thanks, but I don't know these characters either or care about them. So the story does not work much for me. makes me feel like I'm invading the privacy of characters in which I have no interest. Good luck!... Seems like you're having fun, which can serve as a fine end in itself.
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Where to start here...let's see..my disclaimer...I don't watch JAG, so I have no idea who these characters are or how they relate to each other EXCEPT FOR what you've given me in the story. Fanfiction is a lot stronger if you write as if your readers don't know that it's fanfiction. (A rule of thumb I've found that works out a lot better.)
In general, I found this difficult to grasp. The dialogue doesn't seem realistic to me in a lot of places. One example would be the line about the Rose Garden. It seemed a little tacky and out of place for an adult conversation.
Also, since the kiss would seem to be the climax of your story, it might be good to expound on it a little more. You gave very little information and the "At least this was their first one since both admitted they true feelings." is completely uneccessary and tedious.
Now for a few Grammar Nazi recommendations:
“Hey Mac, if YOU'RE free how about some tea with a good looking sailor?” -"your" should be "you're"
SHE too being careful as to what she said. -She should be capitalized.
“You are important to me too Mac. I guess you could say you are the most important person in my LIFE.” -first, "live" should be "life" and "important to me too" is a little redundant. Try "as well" or something that doesn't repeat the same sound.
Harm’s words were the SOFTEST and sweetest words she had ever heard him say, and she knew he was speaking from his heart, something Harm almost never did. -softest, not most soft
When the couple REALIZED the hour Mac got up to go but Harm stopped her. -subject/verb agreement is key! -
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Thanks for your honest critique on my story. Just to give you some background on the story to help you understand it better. First this couple danced around their affection for one another for 9 years. Both knew they wanted each other but neither would admit it. like a couple of love struck teens. Second, they met in a Rose garden and often this was refered to in the show. Third, both were by the book officers and held fast to their honorable convictions. And I thank you for the grammer suggestions and have made them as you suggested. And if you look at my list of stories they all say JAG FANFICTION in the title, so the reader knows up front what it is. Thanks again for your help.
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fan fiction cool haqve you been to fanfiction.com i think you would like it but i don't watch JAG so it is hard to comment
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I have never watched JAG so I really didn't understand the story. You should submit this on www.fanfiction.net They have JAG ones I think.
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I've never seen Jag, but it was pretty good. A little slow and lacking at some points, but it held it's own.
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I'm afraid I know nothing about JAG, so I can't comment on the plot or characters. I'm sorry for that. I do know grammar, however, so I'll try to give you some advice in that regard.
The most obvious error was in dialogue punctuation. You had: "'Well Flyboy, just point him out and I’ll let you know.' she replied with a smile that went from ear to ear." The period after know should be a comma. Whenever you use a dialogue tag ("she said/hissed/drawled/screamed"), use the comma.
You also should watch out for wordiness, just because you don't want to lose your reader. For instance: "Mattie being one of the new neighbors, and being that he was her guardian, he knew they had to leave." I'm not exactly sure what you mean, but I am sure it could be made clearer.
On a positive note, I did like the way you voiced the characters. Even in the event it's not in character, it is interesting. -
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Thanks for your great and helpful critique. I made the punctuation changes as you suggested. I hope I got them all. Thanks for the help.
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Hmmm, I must say first you are a good writer, I hope you write more then fanfic though... Well done and thank you for entering my contest and good luck.
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