Adventures of Disillusionment - Chapter 1 - The Break-Up

The sudden ringing shattered the illusion of warmth and comfort in the world, as I had to drag myself out of bed. My sleep-ridden eyes barely opened long enough for me to see the number on the caller ID.

“Hello?” I yawned in exhaustion into my cell phone. The sobbing on the other line cut into my dreamy state. I listened more intently now, willing my eyes to open.

“Kat?” Her tear-filled voice echoed my name into the my ear.
“Yeah, it’s me. What’s wrong?” Kristin’s shaky voice started to mumble something incoherent, before sobs wracked her again. My addled brain could only handle so much of this. I felt like I’d only slept a few hours and it hadn’t been nearly enough. What time is it anyway? I could hear my deeper more astutely self-obsessed mind asking. I glanced at the bright red lines that signified numbers on my alarm clock. Squinting I realized I didn’t have glasses, which forced me to lean in close to the clock to see that it was only 4:23 in the morning.

“Kristin, honey, calm down. Tell me what happened?” The illusion of calm in voice was there to hide my frustration at the apparent crisis.
“I broke up with him.” The sobbing started again and more incoherent babbling followed. Good riddens the callous thought bounced around in my head before I suppressed it with more compassionate ones.
“Oh, honey, it’s ok. He wasn’t worth it anyway. Hey listen why don’t you wash up and come stay here for a while before classes.” Oh shit, classes, I had those too, and in only 3 and a half hours. Damn it, why did I always get sucked in.

Neil’s unruly head rose from the pillow for the third time now, as he looked at me with confused questioning eyes. His gaze traveled to the clock in frustration. Soon after the realization that it was actually four in the morning his head crashed into the pillow with an angry grunt. I hung up the phone after Kristin agreed that it would be best for her to come over. He turned to face me as his eyes questioned my sanity. I could almost see the question marks over his head as he shifted to allow me to enter the bed again.

I shook my head in response and worried my lip between my teeth. He sat up slightly a look of concern now adorning his face.
“She broke up with Alex.” I simply stated looking down at him. He stared at me dumbfounded before crashing back down onto his back and covering his face with his hands.
“She’ll be over in a half an hour, she hasn’t slept. We should probably get ready. You need to shower?” I ranted for a minute before stopping and waiting for a response. His hands moved away from his face and he peered at me through long black lashes.
“Yeah.” His scratchy voices sounded for the first time that morning.
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The knock on the door sounded throughout the apartment as the smell of eggs cooking wafted to me from the kitchen. I pulled my pants on quicker as I heard Neil’s shout that the door was in fact open. The creek of the door sounded as I appeared in the living room fully clothed. In the doorway stood Kristin, with a backpack on her shoulder and a cried-out exhausted look on her face. Her dark brown hair was pulled neatly back to create an illusion of put-togetherness. This wasn’t the first time I’d seen her this way. Having roomed with her for a year, there were several occasions when I’d been he one to hold her as she cried.

She dropped her bag and collapsed in a sitting position on the floor in the living room. I looked down at her a moment as Neil offered her breakfast and she shook her head slowly and brushed him off.

“There is a couch, you know? It’s pretty comfy too!” I offered with a light smile, trying to illicit a reaction beyond sheer hopelessness.

“I’m used to the floor.” She stared at it as she spoke as if to ascertain the fact. Her voice was low and raspy and cried out. I walked over and folded my pale legs under me as I sat Indian style beside her.

She talked about what happened. About how he neglected her, about how he had been an ass, about a night out partying with her alone at home worried, and about a score of other things that had led up to this morning. She talked through breakfast, refusing to eat, and she talked up until 6:30.

“He didn’t even want to wake up to listen. I told him we were over and he just went back to sleep.” The shakiness was back to her voice, but there were no tears. She was in awe, disgusted, terrified, confused awe. Not knowing what to say I just hugged her and held her for a minute before letting go. She looked up at me, a grateful look in her eyes. Her sharp features and lively green eyes looked a bit dulled by the experience.

The endless series of break-ups and make-ups would continue over the next month and leave us all drained. They would also leave in their wake several casualties of war.
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“Wanna go to the store with me?” I looked up from my magazine at the bright blue eyes that were questioning me. I had to think be bored and wait for Neil or got to Wal-Mart and watch Jamie pick up girls. The blonde guy definitely had his charms, but charisma wasn’t one of them.

“Sure.” I nodded, getting up off the couch and placing my magazine on the glass table in front of it. He nodded in agreement while walking toward the door. “You know, you’ll never pick up girls with me around?” I joked lightly at him as we walked into the bright September sun.

“Yeah? Does a guys sister get in the way of that?” He smiled and I realized once again that was one of his many charms. I smiled back, the braces ignored for the moment. I didn’t want to catch this one, he really was like a big brother.

“No, sisters don’t. But to the casual observer we don’t seem so brother-sisterly.” I stated simply, continuing the jest. “Instead it seems like you’re trying to pick up girls, while you with one.”

“I guess I’ll make it more obvious then.” He pulled out of the driveway and stated driving. Reaching over I turned the music up louder.

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“Kat, we’ll be late if we don’t head back to the duplex.” Neil’s voice screamed at me from the living room.

“They can’t start without you, it’s your birthday.” I was only kidding, but when he popped his head in the doorway to my room, to give me a nasty glare I got the hint. “Ok look, go. I’ll call you for directions in a bit and I’ll meet you there. My hair isn’t working and I have to look pretty for you tonight.” I said this with a wink, although I was still upset at him. While downtown earlier that day, there was an incident with sudden brakes and coffee, my blouse having been the casualty. I had yelled and screamed, and then regretted it. But at that moment, I needed to get pretty. He looked at me unsure as I nodded at him. Finally I grabbed his face between my hands and focused on his sweet brown eyes.

“Go!” He murmured something but obliged. I heard the door slam as I messed with the impossible dew on my head. “Arhhhh.” A frustrated growl and sigh escaped my lips as I reached for my phone to call for help.

An hour later after all hair mishaps were fixed, and my make-up had been touched up Chloe sat beside me as I navigated to Neil’s place with Kristin and Pi in the car behind us. Chloe and Dale, or Pi as everyone called him, had been dating for almost as long as Neil and I had, but she had some concerns about their relationship. These were the same concerns she was now telling me about.

Needless to say, we got lost several times along the way, before finally making it to Neil’s house. The route then still unfamiliar to me.

We entered the house finally, about an hour and a half after Neil had left my apartment. Still exhausted by the day’s events I remained fairly quiet for a while before heading for the now familiar kitchen of the duplex. Picking up a box of the Texas Toast we had gotten earlier I busied myself with preparing the food.

“Why didn’t you tell me about her before?” The all-too familiar male voice at my side spoke in awe.
“Because she had a boyfriend.”
“So?” I looked up to give Jamie the disapproving look he had coming.
“So nothing. Anyway she’s single now, go make the best of it.”
“Thank you!” He half mouthed, half whispered walking away as I finally got the box open and pressed the buttons on the oven.

The toast safely in the over I turned to watch them flirt and for the first time felt the urge to drink. Walking to the glass table in the middle of the living room I poured myself a mixed drink of about 4 shots of Vodka, plus orange and cranberry juices. Sipping on this concoction I watched half the party file into the garage to smoke weed. This all felt too stereotypically college. All too cliché.

After a few hours of shuffling into and out of the house, finishing my drink and watching Jamie hit on Kristin, I became bored and tired. Neil, too busy entertaining guests couldn’t be bothered at the moment and I had nothing to do.

When Paul, Neil‘s tall, lanky brunette roomate, made his way down the stairs with a bottle of Sky vodka he became my salvation from utter and complete boredom. He was the recluse, the house ghost, you saw him on a rare occasion that he was caught leaving the house. Normally he stayed in his room with TV and computer. Now he was here giving me my fourth shot of Sky. He was also there talking to Chloe, talking and laughing and so was she.

I could see what he saw in her, Chloe was about Kristin’s height but heavier set, although her figure was also more curvaceous. Her blonde hair curtained her pretty face and when she laughed her eyes sparkled, at least around Paul.

I should have been too drunk to notice, but I wasn’t. I acted loopy and felt happy from the buzz running through my now alcohol filled veins. She was flirting though. Not the innocent, nothing will come of this flirting, but the real, true, genuine flirtations. What did this mean for Pi? What did this mean for the house of happy couples?

Two hours later Kristin drove away with Pi in the passenger seat, and I sat in Paul’s room, completely sobered, keeping an eye on the possibly dangerous relations between Chloe and Paul. This was entirely too weird, Pi leaving and Chloe staying. They were inseparable, yet earlier that night she confessed wanting a separation. The sight of Paul, the conversation with him, had sent her over the edge of dealing with contentment and into unhappiness in her relationship with Pi. It sent me for a whirlwind of chaotic relationships. Only after an hour of babysitting and several hints from Chloe did I slink into Neil’s bed, exhausted and cold, looking for a comforting night.