The Blood Red Moon (Part 4)

She had never seen such a breath taking place. It was so beautiful, like something out of a fairytale. Just then her thoughts were interupted by Nathan's voice. "Snow! Snow!" he said loudly trying to get her attention. "What do you want?" She had been about to drift when he had interupted her thoughts. "Snow i would like to meet my best friend Liam. He is an elf from the evergreen forest." He held out his hand and helped her up. She shook her head and starred at Liam. He had pointed ears, long blond hair, and forest green eyes. He was totally gorgeous. He had stunning features and he was the most handsom creature she had ever layed eyes on. Then reality hit her. There was no such thing as elves. They were mythical creatures that only lived in fairytales and movies. "He isn't an elf. Elves don't exist." Snow said in a childish tone. She couldn't believe she had sounded like such a child. "Acually elves do exist they just don't go around people," Liam replied in a cold tone.

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Comments


  • DarkOneShadow
    October 28, 2007

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    Haha, this is getting good, you can really do something with this... I like the plot, and keep it going...

    DarkOne


  • beezy92
    December 21, 2006

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    i like this keep it up! (=

    This is an interesting story I can't wait to go back and read the previous few...however, your dialogue needs work. I like the language but it should be like this:

    "Snow! Snow!" he said loudly, trying to get her attention.

    "What do you want?" She had been about to drift when he ahd interrupted her thoughts.

    "Snow, I would like you to mee my best friend, Liam. He is an elf from the evergreen forest."

    etc. anyway this is great, I like the little world yuo've created and the characters! (=