Eva Marina

Eva Marina

By; Anja Laffrenier

As Eva Marina skipped her way home from school, the bright yellow sun beamed down on her. She was a small little girl, very tiny for an eight-year-old. She had long curly auburn hair and sparkling blue eyes that glittered in the sunlight. She lived in a very friendly town, so friendly that as she skipped along the gray-bricked sidewalk, a wave of faces smiled her way, greeting her with, “hello,” “good day,” and “how are you?” Eva couldn’t wait to get home to show her mommy and daddy her wonderful picture she drew of her family. Her smile was spread across her face as she listened to the birds singing melodic tunes, cars zooming by, and children’s laughter in the playground. The sun smiled down upon Eva as she began to hum a song her parents always sang to her. Eva was somewhat of a daddy’s girl and she loved helping him fix things that needed fixing. Although Eva loved to spend time with her father, she also loved playing dress-up with her mother. Eva was an only child; she was a miracle, unlike her unborn brothers and sisters. Eva was a happy little girl who loved to read and play with her mommy and daddy. Eva loved school and she had many friends. She loved to make others laugh and was never shy or afraid to speak her mind. She was free-spirited, caring, and funny, she had the world in her ‘petite’ hands.


Eva made her way home from school, so excited that she ignored the tall maple tree shedding colourful leaves upon her long black driveway and her yellowing lawn. She ran up the front stairs of her big brown house and quietly pulled open the red oak door. The doorknobs warmth sent shivers down her spine. When she stepped into her home, the entranceway came into view; instead of seeing the cerulean rug, the floor was carpeted with suitcases and boxes. Daddy stepped around the corner as the heavy door heaved shut behind Eva. Daddy’s tall figure leaned against the white doorframe, which led into the living room. Daddy had a grin upon his face, it was not the same smile Eva was used to seeing, it was not real… it seemed somewhat forced and bitter. Eva immediately knew that something in her perfect world was going to go wrong, but what? Eva looked up at her tall-slender father and quietly looked at his chiselled chin and red moss-like hair that curled in several different ways. His large blue eyes shifted down towards his daughter and then to the boxes that cluttered the floor.
Eva immediately looked at the suitcases and then down towards her bright pink running shoes that mommy loosely tied in a pretty bow and she whispered slowly,
“Daddy… where are you going?”
Her father’s hoarse voice replied,
“Eva… daddy has to leave for a little while.”
Eva interrupted, “Are you going on a vacation?”
Eva smiled, remembering when her mommy and daddy brought her to Disneyland. Daddy said that they were fixing the sad feelings mommy and daddy had after Eva’s baby brother stopped being born; God decided it wasn’t his time yet.
Eva’s thoughts were interrupted when Daddy’s face once again, forced itself into a smile, “Daddy is moving into his own home sweetheart, mommy and I just can’t live together anymore… We’re getting a divorce.”
“What’s a divorce?” Eva questioned with bewilderment.
Daddy groaned, “It’s when mommy’s and daddy’s leave each other and live in separate homes…”
Eva looked at her father’s things on the floor and tears began to swell within her eyes,
“Don’t you love us? How come you’re leaving Daddy? You and mommy love each other, we all love each other. Did I do something wrong? I promise I’ll clean my room; I’ll be a good girl… I promise!”
Eva heard her mommy sniffling in the living room. Eva turned around the corner and walked into the scarlet living room, daddy close at her heals. Eva saw her pretty, short, and slightly rounded mother sitting on the white loveseat that sat across from the glowing television set. Her mommy’s tears were so large that they seemed to drown the room in sadness. Eva could feel the pain throughout her home and even the happy pictures hanging on the wall, mocked Eva Marina, while her family sat motionless within their frames.
Eva’s mommy had her freckled face buried in her tiny hands and her green eyes were red and blotchy. Mommy’s brown hair looked uncombed and dishevelled, as she heaved back her loud sobs, “Why, why, why, I don’t understand why, why does this keep happening, why are you leaving, it isn’t my fault.” Eva questioned, “Mommy, what’s the matter, why are you crying?”
Her father touched her on the shoulder and Eva turned around and glared at him. Eva just could not understand why daddy would make mommy cry so much.
Eva slowly crept up to her mother and hugged her trembling frame. Mommy’s eyes smiled just a little bit. Eva sat down in the middle of the living room floor, and pulled off her rosy pink shoes one by one and placed them side-by-side. She grabbed her school drawing of her family out from the inside of her indigo and black backpack and placed it on the floor, where both her parents could see it.
Eva smiled, “This is our family…”
Eva took the picture and tore it apart right down the middle, across a drawing of herself holding both her pregnant mother and father’s hand, leaving her father on one side of her ripped portrait and her mother and her unborn baby brother on the other. Eva quickly stood up and placed one half of the picture on the clear glass coffee table across from her mother and gave the other half to her, now hunched over, father.
“Now… you… both have… our family” Eva stammered as huge heavy tears trickled from her eyes. Mommy panicked, searching daddy’s face for something that seemed invisible. Eva kicked her backpack aside and stomped out of the living room, into the hallway and pounded her tiny feet up the stairs that lay diagonally across from the big oak front door. When she reached the top, she sat down on the top stair and listened to her parents mumbling from the living room.
“He is gone, there’s nothing we can do,” daddy mumbled.
“Why are you leaving, this is ridiculous, we both have a part,” sobbed mommy.
“This is the fourth time, this is the fourth miscarriage… I can’t take it anymore”
“You can’t take it anymore, I can’t take it anymore, why are you leaving, you’re breaking our family”
“We were broken a long time ago, way before this kept happening, I thought this time… I thought… maybe this time it would work and everything would be ok, but its not, it’s a sign, we just can’t be together”
“What about Eva?”
“She will stay with you…”


Eva peered through the wooden bars of the banister at her father’s things and prayed for him to stay, she prayed for her mommy to stop crying, she prayed for mommy and daddy to stop fighting and for her baby brother to hurry up and be born. Eva’s cat Mischief jumped onto her lap as if to comfort her. Eva looked down into her lap and noticed how black her cat actually was. Mischief was black like a night sky or like pure black paint, and her emerald green eyes shone as she stared up at Eva.
Eva remembered when mommy’s green eyes danced in laughter when she told Eva she was going to be a big sister. One-day mommy’s eyes stopped laughing and dripped instead, her green eyes turned black like Mischief.
Eva felt her tears falling onto her rosy cheeks and watched as they slowly dripped off her chin, and landed onto Mischief who hurriedly retreated from the crying child, and quickly hurtled down the tall lengthy staircase.
“Was I a bad girl?” Eva asked herself, “is it my fault daddy is leaving, did I do something wrong?”
Eva’s daddy stepped into view; he grabbed a hold of one of the boxes and heaved it out the front door, into the warm colourful yard, leaving Eva sitting by herself at the top of the staircase. Eva slowly climbed down the stairs, ran to her mommy, yanked her hand, “Tell daddy to stop, tell him to stop…”
Eva’s daddy made several trips back and forth from his car to their home and finally when the blue carpet was in view, Eva stumbled towards her daddy and she wrapped her tiny arms around him and she refused to let him go. Eva’s mommy walked into the doorway, almost robot-like and slowly peeled Eva away from her daddy. Eva wriggled free from her mother’s loving grasp, she ran to the door and locked it; she stood in front of the door, desperate for her father not to leave. Daddy grabbed her tiny body and lifted her up into his sturdy arms, he kissed her on the forehead, “I will be back to visit, and you will come and visit me too, just as soon as I get settled in” daddy explained with a sincere smile.
“Who will help you fix things daddy?” Eva questioned. ¯
Eva remembered when her and daddy fixed mommy a cup of tea after her doctors appointment, mommy cried, but her green eyes smiled at Eva. ¯
Eva’s thoughts were interrupted when daddy replied,
“Why you will Miss Eva Marina, you can count on it,” her daddy laughed nervously.
Daddy set Eva down on the plush cerulean floor, and knelt down, he looked straight into Eva’s eyes and whispered almost inaudibly, “Take care of mommy.”
He kissed his daughter’s forehead, dishevelled her hair, and walked out of the door.
Eva watched as her daddy got into his car, put on his seatbelt, and drove away.


That night dinnertime was very quiet and mommy allowed her daughter to sit in front of the television and eat her supper, which was usually unacceptable. Eva did her homework, although she couldn’t quite think about anything else but mommy and daddy.
Eva sighed, “Where is daddy now, where is he gone to?”
Before bed she bathed and brushed her teeth and then Eva and mommy put on make-up and funny clothes until bedtime. When Eva crawled into bed, mommy kissed her on the forehead, “Don’t worry Eva, everything will be ok, I promise.” Mommy went to her own room and Eva heard mommy sniffling again.
Eva wanted to go hug mommy but instead she cried herself to sleep.


When Eva woke up the next morning, mommy wasn’t even dressed for work. Instead she stayed in her bed clutching her stomach while crying. Eva crawled in next to her mommy and hugged her, “Mommy you’re going to be late for work and I’m going to be late for school.”
“Eva, go make yourself something to eat and then go to school, mommy isn’t going to work today.”
Eva looked at her mommy’s face. It was red and blotchy like polka dots and Eva crawled out of bed; a little bit confused that mommy wanted her to make her own lunch. She kissed her mommy on the cheek and made her way to the kitchen where she poured herself a bowl of cereal and made her own lunch, filling it with chips, pop and chocolate. When Eva got dressed, she grabbed her pink shoes and schoolbag from the living room floor, noticing the motionless and happy pictures on the wall again. Eva was jealous that they were so happy, when she felt so sad. Eva went out the front door, wondering if mommy would be all right by herself.
At school Eva was very quiet and she wouldn’t answer any questions that were asked, she didn’t draw any pictures and she wouldn’t talk to any of her friends nor make anyone laugh. She acted somewhat distanced and shy. When Eva opened her lunch at lunchtime, she smiled at her peanut butter and chocolate sandwich and ate all of her junk food packed lunch until her stomach ached, liked mommy’s. At recess-time Eva sat in a corner alone and listened as everyone around her laughed and played together with smiles across their faces.


As Eva Marina lazily walked home from school that day, the rain began to fall and the wind blew so hard that the raindrops pierced Eva’s tiny face and made her sombre blue eyes water. Eva’s hair looked somewhat dull in the dark lighting of that cold and wet day. Eva could not hear any birds singing and the playground was empty. Eva’s friendly neighbours retreated indoors to escape from the coming storm, and she did not take note of them. Instead, Eva looked down at her soaked feet. The wind hissed at Eva, as leaves fell around her small body and scattered across the puddles on the ground.


Eva tip-toed up her long driveway and looked up at the tall and almost empty maple tree, whose coloured, dry, and withered leaves were spread out around the trunk. Her daddy’s car wasn’t in the driveway, but her mommy’s was. Eva needed much more strength today as she pushed open the front door. When she stepped inside her house, Mischief quickly slid across the floor and ran from sight, as memories of yesterday lingered in Eva’s head. Eva kicked off her shoes, threw her backpack and jacket on the floor and ran up the stairs. Eva silently crept into her mommy and daddy’s room, where mommy still lay on her bed; she kissed her mommy, who weakly smiled up at her, “Mommy is still not feeling well.” She picked up the phone and ordered some pizza. Ever since Eva’s family got home from Disneyland, mommy had been different, but not sad. Eva wondered if daddy was breaking their family on purpose. After Eva ate her share of pizza, she crawled into mommy’s bed with her, where daddy used to lay. She buried her whole body beneath the blankets, and snuggled up close to mommy’s tummy, as mommy embraced her in her loving arms.


As the days passed into weeks, weeks passed into months, fall frigidly crept into barren winter winds and the leaves turned into frosty white snow. For the next few weeks the days felt long, empty and shallow. Mommy would constantly cry, and Eva was left to do household chores on her own. At school Eva’s marks started to drastically fall and when her teacher finally contacted her mother, mommy slowly started to get out of her tear-splotched bed and take care of her daughter, who constantly cried herself to sleep at night. Daddy visited with Eva, but it was never the same as it used to be. Christmas passed by and so did the New Year, the only great thing about it, was that Eva got to celebrate the holidays two times instead of only once. Mischief passed on and went to heaven, and Eva cried; she missed Mischief’s happy green eyes, and his lively scamper. Eva wondered when her baby brother was going to be born.


Several weeks later, mommy explained to her daughter,
“You’re going to be staying with daddy until mommy feels better, Eva.”
Eva smiled, “is daddy fixing something?”
“I don’t know,” mommy sighed, as if believing that Eva didn’t really understand what was happening to her once happy family.
“When am I going to be a big sister mommy?”
Mommy did not reply, instead she hugged Eva, and a single tear fell down her cheek.
Eva and mommy curled up together on the couch snuggled in front of the television set and fell asleep.


When Eva saw daddy waiting outside, he seemed different and happier than before. The first thing Eva said when her daddy came to pick her up was,
“Are we finally going to fix something today daddy?”
Her daddy smiled, “nothing needs to be fixed.”
“Our family is broken, can we fix that?”
Daddy looked down, puzzled that his eight-year-old daughter asked such a grown up question. He smiled and whispered softly,
“There will always be something to fix little Miss Eva Marina.”
Eva looked towards the oak door where mommy nervously stood,
“Can mommy help too?”
Daddy did not reply, instead he sighed.
Eva ran to mommy and hugged her around the waist, knowing now, that her baby brother was not coming.
She reached for mommy’s hand and looked down at her new black and green sneakers. She slowly slid her fingers out from mommy’s grasp. Eva gazed at daddy and then at the green buds on the maple tree. She peered up at the sky beyond the budding tree. She watched as the sun slowly peaked out from beneath a cloud.
Eva crept towards daddy and grabbed his hand. She turned and smiled at mommy who was now leaning against the doorframe, with a smile across her face. Eva smiled to herself, thinking about her ripped drawing and the two pieces that still told a story, although it was torn and broken.
“Everything will be ok, we aren’t broken anymore” Eva whispered to herself.
Both, Eva and daddy walked into the warm sunlight, and the snow began to melt.