The Cure (poetry)

Author's Note:This poem was based on the author's true experience's on celexa, a prozac cousin. Its true right down to the doc, napoleon, although he might have been 5'2" instead of 4'9" and the wife is now an ex-wife. Let me know what you think1

--Ronin2

I called the shrink Napoleon3

if only in my mind4

He surely had this complex5

standing 4 foot 96

He pushed his happy pills my way7

and said they were the cure8

for my deep depression9

he told me he was sure10

I had some reservations11

after all this was my life12

and happy pills much like this13

had almost killed my wife14

She was too sad to move it seems15

but the pills brought her around16

She took them all, filled the tub17

and lay down to drown18

But this man was a doctor19

and surely knew more than me20

so i filled my prescription21

a bit begrudgingly22

I took his dope and all day long23

felt lost within a fog24

He swore that would only last two weeks25

it wouldn't be bad for long26

Four weeks past and nothing changed27

i still felt sad and blue28

But now I had this other thing29

I was groggy too30

So I quit the happy pills31

A decision made with ease32

When the only offered cure 33

is worse than the disease

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments


  • LostSoulOfRage
    December 4, 2006

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    first tnx for entering the contest and srry it took so long for me to comment,
    okay very nice flow to it. i like it alot, its very good.
    good luck and keep up the great work. great job.


  • Thwack
    December 1, 2006

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    This has a great flow to it, a nice little syncopation. Short, sweet with an ending that can't be beat!


  • Token Massacre silver member
    November 29, 2006

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    this is an amazingly vivid poem. The imagery is well placed. Although the spacing (which is fixed by clicking edit and deleting the extra lines) is a little distracting it doesn't take away from the poem. Your rhyming scheme is well done. There is a poetry contest here if you write more in the next couple days I think you should enter. Thanks for taking the time to post this and good luck in the contest


  • Kari gold member
    November 29, 2006

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    Welcome to SW

    This was deep...I'm not sure how to respond. You made everything seemed so real. The best of luck to you in the contest.
    Kari

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.