Pansy Tansy Lansy Mansy Fansy?

WHO: Aldrick Bradley and Pansy Parkinson1

WHAT: ...a night outing?2

WHEN: some random night.3

WHERE: The Dungeons at Hogwarts.4

WHY: Itzel made me write a ficlet!! *shakes fist*5

DISCLAIMER: Hogwarts and Pansy Parkinson is all the mind of Jo Rowling, as is the name "Bradley". The character Aldrick is played by a girl named Itzel, but I wrote all of this for her.6

Late at night in the dungeons of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Pansy hid in a dark corner of the school. While she was going for a little walk, she had heard a voice she least wanted to hear. Pretending she hadn’t heard the voice and darting into the nearest dark space, Pansy stood in silence, hoping he would pass.7

“Pansers! I know you’re here somewhere! Don’t hide from me, Pansy Tansy!” Aldrick said in an annoying voice, trying to find the Slytherin. Looking around the dungeons, the Ravenclaw walked slowly around, attempting at spotting the girl. Finally, in the darkest spot of the whole dungeons, Aldrick found Pansy. A smirk filled his features and he pretended he hadn’t seen her, walking past.8

Pansy sighed with relief. He was gone. Walking out of the spot, she started to walk back to the common room. However, she was then attacked by none other than Aldrick Joab Bradley, Ravenclaw Chaser and pimp extraordinaire. 9

Aldrick pinned Pansy against a wall, giggling wildly as he did so. “I knew I’d find you, Pansy Tansy Lansy Mansy Fansy!” 10

Pansy just scowled and said forcedly, “Get off of me!” She tried to kick him.11

“Mm, feisty,” Aldrick said with a smirk, trying to press against her. It was useless to press against the girl, however, because her knee was in the way of him getting any closer to her. Al pouted slightly and said, “Pansers, do you hate me?”12

Pansy glared up at him and muttered, “You are much too close. Get away!”13

Al just giggled and said, “You know you love me, Pans.”14

Pansy made a face of disgust and stated, “No nicknames. I hate you.”15

Aldrick’s smirk became even more evident as he moved closer, moving her knee down with his so that he could press himself against her. “Even better, it makes the sex oh-so much more grand…” he whispered in her ear and then kissed her neck, sucking on the skin.16

Pansy squirmed and moved her neck away from the disgusting boy, “Get your mouth off me!!” she protested and kicked Aldrick squarely in the shins.17

Aldrick immediately moved away when she kicked him, hopping on one foot in pain. “Get your foot off me!” he replied and pinned her against the wall again so that she couldn’t move away. “Besides, you know you want me,” he muttered and looked over her figure. 18

“I do not want you!” Pansy yelled slightly, trying to get away. Where was Draco? He was always there to save her… oh yes, it was late at night. Draco was either angsting or sleeping, either one.19

“I want you too, Pansers!” Aldrick stated and kissed her strongly on the lips. 20

Pansy squealed when he kissed her, trying to get away but being pinned against the wall, she was unable to.21

Aldrick didn’t break the kiss for a very long time. If she hadn’t been squirming so much, Pansy would have been a very good kisser, in Aldrick’s opinion. Setting his forehead against hers and smiling, Al said, “You want meeee!”22

“Are you drunk, boy? I do not ‘want’ you! And I don’t know what you mean by ‘wanting’ either. You can’t own someone!” Pansy exclaimed, squirming to get away. 23

“Oh yes you can! I already have Padders,” he explained. “Now I want you, Panser Tanser!” Al giggled and gave the Slytherin an Eskimo kiss. 24

“EW, I don’t want to be shared like that common whore Padma!” Pansy protested and squirmed enough to get out of his hold on her.25

“Paddie isn’t a whore, I just shag her!” Aldrick said and giggled. 26

“Shag?” Pansy asked with caution. What was a shag? Was it some kind of fluffy dog? Why does Bradley fluffy dog Patil?27

Aldrick started giggling again. “Would you like me to demonstrate?”28

“No I would not, thank you very much! I’d rather not know,” Pansy crossed her arms and glared at the boy.29

“Oh, but I think you would,” Al suggested and brought her closer again, smirking as he did so.30

“No means no, didn’t you hear me?” Pansy said and slapped the boy hard in the face.31

OW. Really ouch. Aldrick had forgotten how hard the girl slapped. “Bitch!” Aldrick said and pinned her against the wall again. Before she could protest, he kissed her strongly on the lips again.32

“Get--” Pansy started. “GET AWAY FROM ME!” she yelled and pushed him off her with a bit more force than before.33

Aldrick rose his eyebrows and was surprised at how forcefully she had tried to shove him off. “Pansers, don’t you want me?” He pouted and crossed his arms. 34

“I don’t want to own you, no!” Pansy stated and started to walk away. 35

Aldrick walked after her and in front of her. “You know you love meee!” he said in an annoying voice and pinched her cheek. “Because we’re both so darn cuuute!”36

Pansy had every intention of walking back to the common room, but then Al had gone in front of her. She almost ran into him and gasped when he was in front of her. When he pinched her cheek, she glared up at him and walked around him, deciding to ignore him. 37

Aldrick, however, followed Pansy and grabbed her from behind, turning her around so she would face him. 38

“Who knows where those hands have been?” Pansy protested and tried to pull away from his grasp.39

Aldrick only pulled her closer, looking over her body seriously and for once not saying anything. 40

The silence scared Pansy, he usually wasn’t like this. “Get away from me! I’ll tell Draco!” she threatened.41

Al smirked and whispered into her ear, “What Draco doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” He kissed Pansy’s ear.42

Pansy’s eyes grew wide. “I belong to Draco and no one else!” she insisted, finally pulling herself away from the Ravenclaw. 43

The boy simply chuckled and put his arm around her. “Draco doesn’t pay any attention to you,” he stated as Pansy squirmed to get out of his grasp. “I would pay oh-so much attention to you, Lansy Pansy!” He brought her closer once again so that he could look her in the eye. “You know you like me better than Draco.” Al smirked and kissed her again.44

Pansy immediately broke away and growled slightly. “My only love shall ever be Draco! And WHO KNOWS where that mouth has been?!” Pansy made a disgusted face and walked away again.45

Aldrick didn’t quite know what to do, but when she started to walk away, a plan came into his head. He smirked slightly as he let her walk away and then suddenly started running after her, shoving her into a dark corridor so that she couldn’t see anything. 46

Pansy almost screamed as she was pushed into the dark corridor, she wasn’t expecting it. However, before she could scream, Aldrick kissed her hard on the lips. Pansy tried pulling away, but he was locked onto her. Ugh, he is attacking me with his tongue!! Pansy thought and shoved him off her.47

Aldrick just smiled and kissed her again.48

Pansy had taken this opportunity to close her mouth completely. She pinched her lips together and made it almost impossible to kiss her.49

Although Pansy had made it impossible for Aldrick to kiss her mouth, he didn’t seem to mind because he just moved down to her neck and started kissing it, trying to undo her robes.50

Pansy really did scream this time as he undid her robes. She kneed Al in an unpleasant place to be kneed and ran for it.51

Al felt a pang of pain from in the darkness. “OW!” he yelled and leaned against the wall, sliding down to the floor.52

Pansy ran back to the common room and sighed with relief when she was inside. Now I must go wash everything he touched! I‘m unsanitary! she thought and made for the bathroom nearest to the common room.53