Payne-ful Memories

She walked quietly past the entrace to the graveyard, a quiet presence on the verge of night. A silouet that shone darkly on the edge of the sunset, passing each gravestone as it came and went... a quiet voice on the wind is the only thing that betrayed her existance.1

"Dunn. Hunter. Stone. Mannon." Each name is stated with a tone as cold as ice, as dead as the person who walked between them. The memories they provided were little consolence for her broken soul.2

*Past the places where you used to learn3

You howl and listen4

Listen and wait for the5

Echoes of angels who won't return*6

She paused at a gravestone, traced the name on the granite block with her eyes even as said his name quietly.7

*He's everything you want8

He's everything you need9

He's everything inside of you10

That you wish you could be*11

"David Payne..." The memories gave her little comfort. Their's had been just a friendship, a friendship that could have been so much more - but wasn't because of her. And now that he was gone?12

*He says all the right things13

At exactly the right time14

But he means nothing to you15

And you don't know why*16

She had created a habit in order to distance herself from the pain that might come from relationships. In order to that, though, she had lost the care she had once held for him in life. Now that he was gone she didn't have to keep herself so distanced... but there was no shoulder to cry on anymore. He wasn't there to listen and speak with her, to give her tired eyes while drawing her problems out... he wasn't there anymore.17

*You're waiting for someone18

To put you together19

You're waiting for someone to push you away*20

A single tear ran down her cheek, and she reached out to trace his first name in cold stone. She knew it was a mistake to have convinced herself she didn't love him. She had - she knew that now that he was gone. But the pain it gave was more than she could bear.21

She knew pushing others away would only result in more mental cuts and bruises... but she knew of no other way to make sure she never made the same mistake again. This time, she wouldn't let them in.22