Cultural Intuition

Divorce, it may not sound like it has anything to do with culture, but for me, it has everything to do with it. With divorce, or it least in my parents’ case, there is usually remarriage. With remarriage, something new enters your life. In my case, that new thing was culture.1

Most kids learn about culture through school textbooks and their friends, but I have to say that most cultural information I had learned before my parents remarriage had gone straight in one ear and out the other. Sure, I’ve talked to people about their religions and customs. There is a difference though, between knowing about someone’s customs and actually understanding them. I’ve found that the only way you can truly understand someone’s customs is to adopt them into your lifestyle, and that truly understanding a culture can help you understand people at large.2

My mom’s house is a blend of Chinese and American. The decorations in our house are sleek and simple. A paper cut picture hangs over a small dresser in our dining room. Look around a bit more and you might find a Chinese man, Steve, my step dad. He was born and raised in China, and is the man responsible for the Chinese culture that has been brought into our home. 3

The best part about having him there, and learning about his culture, is eating. They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, and who could deny that it is the same for girls? I can definitely tell you that what you buy in a Chinese restaurant can’t compare to the traditional, home-style Chinese food that my step dad cooks.4

The second to remarry was my dad. There’s nothing in the design or decoration of his house that would suggest that a person from England lives there, but one does, Debbie, my step mom. Debbie was born and raised in England, and she’s never lost that traditional English accent. Learning to understand her was a challenge. Learning “proper” English is like learning a new language involving loos and crumpets. 5

Now, as I’ve said before, I love food and English food doesn’t fall anywhere short of Chinese food. A certain pub in Atlanta has become one of my favorite places to eat one of my favorite meals, fish and chips, a traditional English meal involving fish and french fries.6

When you live with a new culture you learn things that you can’t learn from just a discussion with someone or reading a textbook. To really understand other peoples’ cultures, you sometimes have to take who they are and bring it into your life, and once you understand someone’s culture, you can truly understand them and some of the things they go through each day. 7