The Girl they call Rain

"Rain get up" call a lady from out side the door."comeing" yelled a girl.Than out the door came a 13 year old girl with pale skin and pale eyes and brown hair.She was dressed in a pale moonlight dress."come on baby"the lady said.So she got in this black limo and drove away. 1

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have 0. (?) (Line numbers)
    Ratings: