Grief

Nurture the Darkness of your soul
until you become whole.
Can you embrace in your arms the One and not let go?
Can you polish your mysterious mirror
And leave no blemish?
When the Great Dark gives and takes away
can you be content with the outcome?1

Eredar'a Gul, Chapter VI

2

Keruptis and Maevrim knelt on the floor of their home, examining Jettblack’s condition. Keruptis leaned closer, muttering. “She looks paler…more so than usual. She is very ill, Maevrim.”3

Maevrim sat back on her heels and rested her hands over her belly, carefully considering Jett’s burns and poisoning. “We should bring someone who knows what’s going on.” I could think of someone, but you might kill him if I speak his name. 4

Jett’s eyes were open, staring out without focusing. Keruptis spoke decisively, “I suggest we make her Fel-Sworn.”5

Maevrim frowned; they’d had this struggle with Jettblack before. “Without her permission? If she fights it…” Maevrim shuddered slightly at the thought of a mindless, destructive Jettblack…especially with knowledge of Maevrim and Keruptis’ child.6

Keruptis shook his head. “The vampiric demonic blood will fight the tainted blood she's been infected with.” Keruptis' brows wrinkled together as he considered the possibilities.7

Maevrim lifted an eyebrow, pressing for further reflection. “Vampire or not, her blood will still have to deal with the Purity of Lord Banehallow's own Blood. If she can embrace the Darkness, she will be fine.”8

“Yes, if she fights serving the Great Dark, we will have a lot of explaining to do to her Order.”9

Maevrim tried once more, though she knew it was futile. “What if she wakes and thinks she is bound to you, not the Dreadlord?”10

Keruptis leaned forward even closer to Jettblack, "Jett, can you hear me?" He shook his head. “She oblivious to everything; Let us begin.” When Maevrim made no move to respond, he firmly called her to attention.11

Maevrim consented, rising slowly. She considered Jettblack’s trance-like state. “Shall we continue the invocations for the entire Ritual?”12

“Yes.” Keruptis moved across the cottage to retrieve the Onyx Chalice containing the Ritual Blood.13

Maevrim began to prepare herself, halting a moment at the awkwardness of jumping straight into the Fel-Sworn Ritual. “Shall we open the space with the Torch and Chalice?”14

Keruptis took his position. “It is not necessary.” He pointed at Jettblack’s burns, spread across her right side, palms, and feet. “Notice the burn marks… they appear to have been inflicted from holy light.” 15

Maevrim nodded. “They were. It is where she was in the Cathedral, or so I was told.”16

“Let us begin.” Keruptis’ command was clear.17

Maevrim closed her eyes, pulling herself upright. She willed the words of the Ritual to her mind, drawing on the Darkness for focus. Semi-chanting, she began to recite the powerful words.

“Push far enough towards the Void,
Hold fast enough to Darkness,
The myriad creatures-
I have beheld them, whither they go back.
See, all things howsoever they flourish,
return to the root from which they grew.”

18

The control in Keruptis’ voice flowed effortlessly as he began his part. “The universe cries out to be restored; the music of the Spheres waits to ring clear once more. Even through our corrupt forms, we long to serve the Natural Order and the Great Dark.”19

The ritual continued flawlessly, quickly reaching the point where the candidate was to drink the blood. Keruptis knelt before Jettblack, holding the Chalice to her lips. "Drink, Jett—drink deeply." he commanded with a dark whisper.20

Jettblack obeyed; Maevrim watched closely for any sign of change or healing in her body. They finished the ritual, then stepped back to wait for the blood to take effect.21

Keruptis studied Jettblack. “It should strengthen her...I think.” Maevrim nodded, her jaws clenched tightly. Jett’s eyes fluttered, her left hand moving slightly.22

Keruptis smiled, speaking in low tones, "Rest easy, Jett, you have been ill." Jett awoke fully, taking a great breath; her burns began to heal themselves. She looked around, demanding something in the Elf tongue. “Fulo no O?”23

Maevrim whispered, half to herself, "Good, she does not fight the Darkness." She ventured a guess at Jettblack’s question. “Silithus. You are in our home, Jett.”24

Keruptis’ eyes glinted darkly. "How do you feel?" He began to move, but Jett’s eyes had fixed on Maevrim as soon as she’d spoken. Jettblack bared her fangs and let out a low growl.25

Maevrim watched Jettblack's actions, instantly aware of the problem and steeling herself. “ My Lord, is there a handmaiden we might borrow a moment...?”26

Keruptis froze. “Hmmm... here is something I didn't consider…yes. Surath!” He beckoned to the undead standing guard outside the door. “Fetch a handmaiden; a…voluptuous one.” 27

Jettblack suddenly shrieked in her tongue again; she launched herself at Maevrim, who did not flinch as Jett’s fangs sank deeply into her neck. Jettblack drank, not caring where the blood came from, only wanting more.28

Keruptis tried to pull Jettblack away. “Jett! Contain yourself!”29

Maevrim muttered through the sensual pain, "I would hurry with the Handmaiden...I don't think even you could pull her off." Keruptis blinked, taken aback as Maevrim paled visibly. He glanced out the door expectantly. 30

Saetania sprinted into the cottage. “Is everything alright?! Surath said to hurry!” Keruptis grabbed her without a word, throwing her to Jettblack as Maevrim buckled. Jettblack released her as she fell, reason returning to her eyes. She muttered something that was still not quite Common, staring down at Maevrim who lay unmoving. “Oh…no…what have I done?” 31

Keruptis looked at Maevrim’s wound; the wound that should have been pouring blood was barely oozing. He spoke quietly, “Jett, you have bled Maevrim quite low.”32

She shook her head, denying the obvious truth, “No…I would not…” Realization began to sink in. “Oh my God, the baby…” 33

Keruptis pushed the handmaiden to Jettblack again. “Jett, feed on Saetania.” Saetania rocked forward numbly, then blinked and struggled. “What?!”34

Jettblack heard his words, then her nature claimed her once more. She jumped at Saetania, sinking her teeth in and drinking. Saetania pulled Jett to the ground, moaning as her lifesblood was slowly drained. Jettblack withdrew as Saetania passed out; this time her victim was only wounded deeply. Jett sat up, rocking back and forth.35

Keruptis knelt beside Maevrim, whispering her name. When she didn’t respond, he reached for the Onyx Chalice, hoping the blood would revive her some. “Drink, Maevrim.” Maevrim's tongue worked weakly to lap at the blood a moment. She choked out a word, barely audible.36

Jettblack looked up from examining her burns. “Keruptis… how...I am...how can I help?”37

He spoke calmly as he stood. “Jett, you have nearly drained her... hmmm.” She backed up slowly, watching him move to fetch a pitcher of water. He poured a large amount of sugar into it, then held Maevrim and helped her drink it all. Jett watched with wide eyes, making numerous apologies. Keruptis ignored her and began to vigorously rub Maevrim's gray arms and legs, trying to circulate what blood remained.38

Jettblack took Maevrim’s hand, trying to make amends. “I can give her some of mine…I am so sorry…I…I hate myself…Will she be…ok?”39

Maevrim pushed at the cup, her mouth forming words she strained to whisper to Keruptis. He took no notice, lost in self-loathing. “I should have forseen this, and had a handmaiden ready.” He caressed Maevrim’s hair, whispering painfully, “I’m sorry, Maevrim.”40

Jettblack bowed her head. “No…I am sorry…tell me how to fix this and I will.”41

Keruptis continued to stroke Maevrim’s hair. “She will recover... with rest.”42

They sat in silence for many moments. After awhile, Jettblack shifted. “How…how did I get here?”43

Keruptis moved carefully so as not to disturb Maevrim’s sleep. “We brought you here, Jett. How do you feel?”44

Jettblack stared off, troubled. “I feel lost. I can recall him…that Templar.”45

Maevrim woke for a moment and reached out her hand, her fingers brushing Keruptis' robe lightly before she fell into dreams again.46

Keruptis slid closer to her. “You should feel the Great Dark. You are Felsworn, now, Jett. It is all we could think of to save you.”47

Jett blinked, perplexed. “I am a…what?” She looked at Maevrim, then back to Keruptis.48

“You are Felsworn. You are now bound in service to Darkness.” Keruptis grinned darkly at her.49

“What … does this all mean?” A pale hand flew to her head in dismay. “My God…my guild! Are they alright?”50

“ It means that you serve the Great Dark—the same as I. Your guild is intact,” Keruptis assured her. “They are fine. With the supplies your Widows have brought from the Plaguelands, I have raised an undead army. They stand ready to slaughter the Templares, as we agreed. To ensure victory, I will need only a few more deliveries.” His eyes became lit with an unholy light.51

Jettblack nodded. “Yes.” She became lost in thought a moment. “What did you make me? Did you make me more of a monster then I was?”52

Keruptis spoke without a hint of humour. “That would be difficult to do, Jett.” She glared angrily at him as he paused. “But the monster that you are, now serves Darkness…which, I believe you already did.” He grinned wickedly at Jettblack.53

Jettblack scowled a moment longer in the silence. Suddenly, her eyes narrowed as she sniffed delicately, trying to place a new, strange odor in the room. Her eyes widened again as she realized the source. “The baby!” She cried out, sliding to Maevrim. “She has lost the baby…”54

Keruptis spun to examine Maevrim. “WHAT?!” 55

“The scent…” Jett whispered, blood tears running down her face. 56

Keruptis ran his hands over Maevrim’s body, trying to deny what Jett said. “No…it cannot be…my child is gone…NO!” He roared, cradling Maevrim in his arms and pressing his face against her hair. Her hand fluttered weakly to rest on his arm.57

Jettblack watched, unsure of what to do. She threw herself on her knees, “I am so very sorry. Please…forgive me…” she begged.58

Keruptis continued to hold Maevrim, stroking her hair with his hand. He glanced up at Jettblack, his eyes burning. 59

Jettblack begged for a response, “I do not know what to say…please…”60

Keruptis’ voice was deadly and unassailable. “She is going into…Jett, I will need water and cloth.” 61

Jettblack nodded and darted from the room to refill the pitcher of water. 62

Maevrim twitched, a low groan sounding in her throat. Her stomach seemed to tighten for a few seconds.63

Water sloshed from the overfull pitcher as Jett ran back to Keruptis. “She’s going into labor,” he confirmed. “Help me, Jett.” 64

Jett knelt beside Maevrim, sniffing uncertainly, “What do I do??” Keruptis growled at her again. “She is giving birth, Jett.”65

Maevrim paled further, her eyes dulling as sweat broke out on her face.66

He spoke again, still holding Maevrim. “She has gone into labor. Her body is rejecting the child.” His face showed no emotion except a tightness around his eyes.67

Jettblack stumbled to her feet, calling her healing powers into focus. She trembled as she declared, “That should help heal her, and the baby.”68

Keruptis snarled at Jett. “The baby is dead…” Maevrim panted weakly a moment, turning her face to Keruptis in panic. “Push, Maevrim. It is okay…breathe.”69

Maevrim 's body arched, her face contorting with pain—obviously greater this time. Jett knelt beside her and took her hand as Keruptis encouraged her. “That’s it…” He looked to Jett. “You’d better remove her clothing.” 70

Jett nodded, “Yes!” As she stripped Maevrim’s battle-clothes from her, she began to sing an Elvan song, trying to calm Maevrim. She took Maevrim’s cloak, dipping it in the water and wiping the traces of sweat from her body.71

Keruptis gritted his teeth, "Push Maevrim, again." Maevrim moaned again, twisting. She hissed weakly, "Get it out."72

Jettblack looked to Keruptis at Maevrim’s words. He sighed deeply. “It is no use, Jett. We must get the child out quickly.” Keruptis pulled a wicked-looking dagger from within his cloak. “She’s too weak from blood loss to push.”73

Jettblack began to cry again, lifting her right hand to extend a rapidly growing nail. As she saw the dagger, the nail retracted.74

Keruptis grasped the dagger, hesitating a brief moment before making an incision across Maevrim's lower abdomen. Maevrim cried out, but held still. Jett closed her eyes, unable to watch as Keruptis pulled the stillborn child from Maevrim’s body. His shout pushed Jettblack into action. “Now heal her, quickly, Jett!” She stood, again focusing the healing on Maevrim’s body, casting her spells repeatedly until Maevrim’s belly was healed. Jett collapsed forward as Keruptis cradled the stillborn infant in his arms. “Comfort Maevrim, Jett.” He walked outside with the child.75

Maevrim rolled onto her side, tears falling silently. She struggled to move. “Keruptis…no…I have to see…” She feebly collapsed.76

Jettblack placed a hand on Maevrim’s shoulder, then fell on top of her, sobbing. She lay there, her body shaking in great heaves, as outside Keruptis screamed his fury to the sky. She turned her head away when he walked back in to kneel beside Maevrim; she could smell the child.77

Keruptis lowered the baby tenderly, placing it in Maevrim’s arms. She pulled it close to her chest, her tears already dry from dehydration. She muttered hoarsely, “My baby…Keruptis…our baby…” Her voice choked as she drifted into unconsciousness again. Jettblack kept her hand on Maevrim’s shoulder, crying for her. 78

Keruptis caressed Maevrim’s hair. “We shall let her rest, Jett.” Jettblack nodded stiffly, rising and walking across the cottage. She leaned on a pillar and sobbed.79

Maevrim moaned in her sleep, wrapping her arms around the baby more tightly. Keruptis gently rubbed his hands over her legs and arms, trying to keep the blood moving. Jettblack turned, streaks of blood drying down her cheeks. She watched Keruptis cover Maevrim and their child with a blanket. “She will be alright, Jett. You may rest here if you like.”80

Jettblack shook her head. “Thank you…but…I need to get away from here.”81

Keruptis nodded wearily. “I understand. You feel well?”82

She continued to stare at the blanketed form. “I am a monster…I have killed before… but not since the …” her voice trailed off bitterly. “No…I hate myself. I can run from here ...but not far enough from myself.”83

Keruptis glanced down at Maevrim cradling their dead child. “She will be fine, Jett. Maevrim is strong.”84

Jettblack pulled her hood over her head, wrapping a mask over her face to hide the guilt and sorrow. “Your baby…tell her I am sorry.”85

“Our child was to serve the Great Dark, Jett.” Keruptis glanced sharply at her. “We can count on you to do so now.”86

Jett bowed deeply. “I will. Whatever you need.”87

Keruptis dismissed her. “Go somewhere safe, and rest, Jett. The effects of the poison should be gone.”88

She bowed again, moving towards the door. “I will. Thank you.”89

Keruptis nodded. “May Darkness embrace you.”90

“As well as you.”91

He turned to Maevrim again; she stirred, opening her eyes a small bit. “My Love…”92

Keruptis leaned forward and whispered softly, “Shhh. Rest, Maevrim.” She looked at the child in her arms and began to cry softly again. He lay down beside Maevrim, cradling their dead child between them.93

Maevrim traced the baby’s face, sliding her fingertip into his tiny hand. “He looks like he might start breathing any second...” She slipped into her restless sleep once more.94

Keruptis stayed silent for a long time, his eyes heavy with grief. When she whimpered, he pulled her close and held her tightly.95

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