Once upon a fairy-tale

In a land far, far ago... Beyond the fields we know, there was a race of very strange woodland creatures called "Trids". Now Trids are not your ordinary woodland creature. No! They look rather like you'd imagine a lion might look if the gazelle it was chasing suddenly changed into a giant, fire-breathing dragon. Of course, that's just the expression which usually was on the face of your average Trid. They lived in a clearing in the large, large forest of the world(back in the times when the world was all forest, stream and mountain) and their village in this clearing was entirely surrounded by a river which went through the clearing, forked, and then merged back again with itself, leaving an island on which the Trids had built their village. Now normally this would be a very bad place to build a village, but though the trids were rather small creatures, aerodynamic, agile and swift, the predators of the forest were swifter. Back in those times, all animals were as reactionary to water as the house-cat remains today. After all, nobody had invented or domesticated bathing yet.1

There was only one bridge, and the Trids, not knowing how to build proper bridges, had tried and failed to build another. This bridge had been built by a Jew who lived among the Trids in those ancient times, and needing no other bridge himself, and the Trids being Gentiles, the Rabbi never gave a second thought to building another one. Now the Rabbi seldom used the bridge, as he simply lived off of the food and water which the Trids brought back from the forest. He was somewhat of a comic-relief to the Trids, and for that, the Trids let him live in a form of symbiosis with them. After all, the Trids truly did love a good laugh, and the Rabbi unwittingly provided a subject which was the brunt of many, many a Trid's joke.2

But there was not much laughter in the village of Trids lately. The reason the Trids all looked like a surprised feline, who has just found his prey to be an inflamed serpent of gargantuan proportions was that lately, a Troll had decided to take up its residence beneath their one bridge. It was a Water-Troll, who stood up straight, twelve-feet tall, and two feet above the river beneath the bridge, and waited for the Trids to come to cross the bridge on their daily foray into the forest. Whenever a Trid came tromping across(for that is how trids usually walked: in a rather "tromp"like fashion) the Troll would leap out of the water in one aerodynamic, agile, swift motion, and land on the bridge. Every Trid, at this point, never ceased to find itself surprised by the enormous, crustacean-like knees and feet of the Water-Troll, as knees and feet together came rushing forth and the Troll gave one swift kick to each Trid, sending each Trid flying back across the bridge, and right into the center of the village.3

After three days of every Trid's expression looking like a hungry, but overly-fearful lion, the Chief Trid took his plea to the comic, yet sage Jew in their company.4

"Oh Rabbi" he said(for the creatures of the forest were accustomed to addressing all Jews in this manner) "Oh Rabbi, what can we do? For three days, we have had nothing fresh to eat. For three days, we have been forced to satisfy our hunger and thirst on nothing more than the raging, muddied river and the leaves and stars which hang like the bright fruit of heaven in the sky. What shall we do, Oh Rabbi?" he pleaded. "A Water-Troll, monstrous and fierce, five times the size of a man in height(for Trids were never good at calculation) daily kicks any Trid who tries to cross our only bridge back into the village. You are our last hope, Oh Rabbi! Will you face the deadly Water-Troll and restore our stomachs to satiety?"5

The Jew looked puzzled for a moment, for he had not known until this very moment that Trids could speak in the tongues of man. This greatly disturbed him, especially, because the Trid was speaking in Hebrew, and it had always been a personal conviction of the Jew that only Jews were allowed to know Hebrew.6

"I must bring this injustice up when next I speak to the Lord, my God." the Jew thought to himself.7

He walked out of his hut without answering the Trid, who turned after him, in supplication.8

The Jew walked down to the bridge, and crossed. He took a short walk in the forest, and then, perplexed, came back to the bridge.9

Once more, the Jew attempted to cross the bridge, and once more, the Jew found no Water-Troll to confront him.10

All the Trids had gathered to watch, as the "Rabbi" amazingly seemed to be able to do what no Trid had been able to do for three long days.11

The Rabbi looked down in frustration at the water, and saw the reflection of the Troll's tremendous face in the water.12

"Troll, oh great Water-Troll" he said. "Oh thou with knees and feet of dark injustice, why do you not come out and face me."13

With that, the Troll bounded gracefully onto the bridge, and the Jew, too, was taken aback with the size and crustacean-like quality of its knees and feet.14

The Troll looked at the Jew, and looked behind the Jew to the Trids, gathered at the other end of the bridge.15

With a smirk, and a devilish look in his eye, he said16

"Silly Rabbi... Kicks are for Trids"17