Starry Embrace

As she sat, Sophia dreamed of the man she had grown to love. He was everything she had ever wanted; sweet, compassionate, sincere, and so many other things she couldn't even begin to put a name to. Wes was the man of her dreams and she loved him with all of her heart but best of all he loved her in return. He had told her on more than one occasion that he did love her although he was reluctant to actually say it. Wes was scared to let Sophia in sometimes but at times he would get caught up in the moment and let how he truly felt slip out. When he did say it Sophia's breath would catch in her throat and tears would well in her eyes but her only response would be a loving smile and passionate kiss, her actions spoke volumes more than her words ever could.. These were Wes and Sophia's happiest moments but they seemed so distant now.

Wes and Sophia had become the best of friends within hours of meeting. As silly as it sounds Sophia had known she would love Wes forever from the first moment their eyes had met in the dimly lit coffee shop. Sophia had only managed a shy smile but Wes returned hers with a welcoming one, beckoning her toward the table. She cautiously approached the small table Wes sat alone at. He was reading the New York Times and sipping his coffee, Sophia reached out her hand in a friendly gesture and he took it but instead of shaking it Wes kissed the back of her hand gently with his warm soft lips. Sophia’s mouth dropped open slightly as she thought maybe chivalry wasn’t dead after all. Their first meeting began a steady pattern.

The friendship they developed in that small cafe quickly turned to love. The two would spend hours just being together talking about anything, everything, and nothing. Sophia soon learned small details of the hard life Wes had become accustomed to. Wes at 24 had tried to kill himself four times and each as unsuccessful as the last and leaving him more broken than before. Wes had had a hard life and he knew Sophia should not get too attached to him, he was too screwed up for her to waste her love on. Sophia, at only 16 hadn't experienced the pain and hardship Wes had endured all of his life. However, Sophia wasn't concerned with Wes's past, she loved him all the same.

Just as Sophia thought life was perfect Wes began to pull away from her. She didn't understand what she had done wrong. He wouldn't return any of her phone calls and when she tried to visit him his parents had always shooed her away quickly telling her that he was too busy to have company. Sophia was so confused, thoughts of Wes swam through her mind every second. Her sudden exclusion from his life left her feeling completely betrayed and alone. Months passed and nothing changed, not the silence nor the heartache Sophia still felt.

The only contact they had was an occasional instant message. Wes finally, in a long over due IM, confessed that he was just going through a lot and didn't want to hurt her. This was not the answer Sophia had wanted, she begged him to tell her what the problem was and she promised, she swore on everything she loved that it would never effect the love she had for him. He broke down and told her after many promises and I love you’s from Sophia. He slowly typed the heartbreaking story that had been tearing them apart, three years ago around this time Wes and his ex-girlfriend had conceived a child, Wes had been ecstatic when he had learned that he was going to be a father but tragically she lost the baby and the tie that had held their relationship together. Sophia had cried when Wes told her he would have been a dad, She knew he would have been a wonderful parent. Sophia still didn't understand why he had hid this from her but she was determined to be there for him no matter what. She knew the miscarriage of his son and the break up with his ex had devastated him. Knowing the pain Wes was in broke Sophia's heart but even after he had confided in her about his son Wes was still making any excuse he cold to avoid her.

Sophia knew missing him would never end but she was just trying to except that they would never be as close as they had been in the past and still as she tried to move on she couldn't help but think that Wes was the one for her. She cried when she thought of his strong arms holding her and those baby blue eyes that could see into her soul.

Sophia wished on the stars begging them to bring him back to her however, the stars refused to listen. They ignored her pleas as Wes looked up into the same stars and put a gun to his head. This would be Wes's fifth attempt at suicide but this time it would be different, this time the stars that blinked down on him would make all his wishes come true. Sophia had screamed into the sky when she had heard the lone gun shot that night. She knew in her heart that Wes was gone forever.

When Wes's mother gave her the news the next morning Sophia collapsed onto the floor in a heap of exhausted confusion. She had known what was coming, that feeling in her heart told her what happened, but hearing the words coming from his sobbing mothers mouth had been more than Sophia could handle. Sophia had slumped over on the floor for what seemed like forever too numb to cry. As they told her that he had left a note, she snapped back to reality and instantly yearned to know what his final words had been.

His mother gently pulled the note from her pocket and handed it to Sophia. Sophia began to shake as she read the note to herself. "Don't cry for me mom, I'm happier now than I have been in so long, and dad I’m sorry for the disappointment I have been to you my whole life, I hope you can forgive my mistakes, and finally to my dearest Sophia,” Sophia gasped when she read her name, “To my dearest Sophia don’t forget me please because the only thing I wish is that I can remain in your heart forever, I love you and I always have, don’t ever doubt that, I believe with all my heart you were the one for me.” With that he said goodbye and I love you and signed his name Wesley James Pierson.

Sophia was shocked at everything she had just read. Her head was spinning like she had just been swept up into a swirling tornado. She couldn’t even attempt to comprehend all the words on the paper in her hand. She knew the glittering stars would be her only solace, only then could she really talk to Wes again. Sophia laid on her bed starring at the ceiling trying to understand everything that had happened, words whirring around her head always just a bit too fast to make out.

Finally, she saw the stars twinkling outside her window, the moment she had waited for all day. Sophia sprinted to the backyard and looked up into the gleaming night sky. She took a long deep breath and began to talk to the stars as if Wes were standing right beside to her. She sputtered out word after word, tears streaming down her face, until she felt as though the stars were coming down around her. Although, it was not in a suffocating way it felt as if they were comforting arm wrapped soothingly around her. Sophia’s tears began to subside and in this moment that she knew Wes had heard her. He understood her sadness, her confusion, and longing. Sophia knew he was there with his arms wrapped around her, like so many times before. As his note had read she must keep him alive in her heart, never let his memory die. If she remembered he would always be a huge part of her then maybe the hurt wouldn‘t be so hard to bear. She hugged her shoulders tightly and whispered to the stars, “Wesley I love you and you will always be in my heart.”