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Chapter One2
Doors and Bonks3
Sharon lay on her bed thinking about the day. 4
"I'm so glad I got rid of Anny!" she thought. "I'll never forget the look on his face and the way he cried! I must tell my best friend Katherine!" Sharon jumped off her bed and dashed out of her room, down the stairs, and out the door. 5
"OUCH!" She cried, as she bonked her head on the top of the doorway. Sharon had made the doorway herself. It was four feet high and two feet wide. It was her "secret doorway". Since she just broke up with Anny, she knew he would still be looking for her, so she thought that this doorway would come in handy. 6
She finally got to Katherine's house. She banged on the door. No one answered. In her attempt to bang again, the door swung open, and her fist hit Katherine on the head. Katherine slammed the door and ran back inside. Sharon was stunned. What just happened? She thought aloud. Katherine opened the door again. She looked like she was crying. Sharon was frantic. 7
" I didn't mean to hit you.... I…. I...I was banging the door.... a…a…and it just swung....open." 8
Katherine looked at her as if she was an idiot. 9
"You never hit me!" She answered. "But my mother sure has a large bump on her head." 10
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Chapter Two26
The Investigation27
Sharon realized that it wasn't Katherine's head she had hit, it was Katherine's mother! 28
"Well Bruises are romantic! As Anny once said!" scoffed Sharon as she shoved her way in.29
"By the way I came to tell you just that!"30
"What?" asked Katherine as she pulled Sharon up the stairs that led to her room.31
"I broke up with him! It was so romantic!" said Sharon as she jumped onto Katherine’s bed.32
"Plus..." continued Sharon promptly.33
"I am now a secret agent!"34
Katherine's girly giggle of delight and disbelief was heard all over the nerighborhood.35
"Well who do you work for?" asked Katherine after she had calmed down.36
"Me, of course!"37
Katherine looked confused a bit, but thought Sharon was smarter anyway.38
The room fell silent.39
"You know Sharon, I was just wondering...maybe there is some kind of spy camera hidden in my room. Can you find it?"40
"Ofcourse I will!" said Sharon as she jumped off the bed.41
She picked up a piece of rotting cheese from Katherine’s secret drawer.42
"Hmmm....this just might be it!" she laughed as she tossed it into the trash.43
Katherine wailed with joy as Sharon continued her inspection.44
Sharon picked up Kathines wallet, "This probably has a recording device attatched!" Sharon threw it out the window. She walked up to the large clock that hung on the wall. She took it off and brought it to her ear. She gasped as she heard the ticking.45
"It's a time bomb!" she shouted, as she threw it out of the window.46
Sharon continued her inspection until Katherine's room was completely empty. 47
"I think that's the last piece of danger in this room." said Sharon, as she broke Katherine's copy of the Cinderella sound track. (She thought it might be something like a ninja disc.)48
"Oh, thank you, Agent S.! You saved my life!" said Katherine, as she jumped up and hugged Sharon.49
"Well, what are agents for?" said Sharon, as she walked out of Katherine's room. She smiled at her own intelligence.50
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Chapter Three57
The Disguise58
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Sharon walked down the sidewalks of Sho and Marina Town. But suddenly, she stopped. 60
What am I doing? she thought. I'm a secret agent. I should be in disguise. But who will I disguise myself as? she smiled as she thought of the perfect person.61
* * *62
Sharon walked out from behind a bush. She had magic-markered glasses around her eyes, and a moustache below her nose. She wore a curly wig, which she thought, resembled the Principal's hair. She walked, pidgeon-toed, just how she thought the Principal walked.63
Heehee. No one will recognize me in this clever disguise. she thought to herself. But she was dismayed to see Miss Dorfas running up to her. She seemed frantic.64
"Oh, Billy!" she said, with a worried look on her face. "Sharon has run away from Sho and Marina town! I had given her an F yesterday as I always do and she seemed more offended then usual!"65
Sharon's face bursted.66
"She is such an awful case!" snorted Miss Dorfas. "And how she blackmailed Anny into leaving her! She said that if he didn't leave her then she would tell everyone that he actually likes Pigly-loo!"67
Sharon was shocked, she had done no such thing.68
"It’s true Billy, my love! She did it! Anny came crying to me yesterday telling me everything!"69
So like him! Sharon thought.70
"I think we should have her brought to court, and our divine rulers, Sho and Marina, will bring her to justice! Two days in jail for black mail and heartbreaking!" 71
Just then, Principal Billy came up behind Miss Dorfas. He was just about to scare her, when he saw Sharon's face with a marker-drawn moushtache, and glasses. He shrieked, which scared Miss Dorfas anyway. 72
Miss Dorfas spun around at the shriek, and saw Principal Billy lying on the ground hugging her legs. 73
"Take that thing away!" he shouted. 74
Miss Dorfas was stunned. Could there possibly be two Billys? She thought.75
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Chapter Four83
Sharon Is Arrested84
It was then, that Billy looked up and shouted, "It's her! It's the heartbreaker! The blackmailer! The...the.... He stood up. "How dare you mock me! There is only one principal in this town and that is ME!" Billy's face was red. Miss Dorfas, however, was extremely embarrassed that she was tricked into thinking that Sharon was her beloved Billy. 85
"And she should be charged for trickery! That's one more hour in jail!" She shouted. Sharon started to laugh. 86
"You fools! You think you can actually put me in jail? Why, I am the most famous person in Sho and Marina town. Everybody will be on my side! Hahahahaha!" Her laugh was most astonishing. 87
Billy had already called the police, which was Timmy's dad. Timmy's dad parked on the sidewalk, jumped out of the car, and pointed his BB gun at Sharon. 88
"You are under arrest for blackmail and heartbreaking." He said. 89
"And trickery!" Miss Dorfas added. 90
"Fine!" Sharon snorted, and got into the car. 91
Will they be surprised when they find that everyone in the town is on my side! Hahaha! she thought.92
The car crashed into a pole, then drove off to the police station.93
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Chapter Five110
The Police Station111
Sharon looked out of the car window. She saw a rusty shed next to Timmy's house. She realized that they were driving towards it. The car stopped. Timmy's dad pulled her out and dragged her to the shed without saying a word. Sharon only laughed in her heart. When they finally got there, he plopped her down onto a chair and walked out of the room. 112
Sharon sat in silence. Just then Mr. Dorfas walked in. 113
"Why are you here?" asked Sharon. "Aren't you supposed to be at school teaching everyone about what comes out of their butts?" Sharon said. 114
"How dare you insult me! As your ignorant self did not know, I have switched from teacher to policeman when I found out about Anny's heartbreak. I thought it would be fun to arrest, and question you." 115
Sharon was shocked. He's trying to destroy me! He's jealous that I'm so famous and he's not! 116
"So, we will begin the questioning." said Mr. Dorfas, as he grabbed a stack of papers from the desk. 117
He handed them to Sharon, along with a pencil and eraser. 118
"You have to fill these in or you can't leave this police station." He said, then walked out of the room and locked the door.119
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Chapter Six134
Questionare and Natural Flour135
Sharon just sat there with the papers in her hands. She looked down at the questions and started reading them, they were not at all what she was expecting. 136
Why, these are private questions about Anny and me! I knew he was trying to destroy me. For, the second I hand these over to him, all filled out, he will use them against me in court! 137
She looked at the last question.138
Q. 100,000,000,000,000,000: It is illegal in Sho and Marina Town to break someone's heart. Did you know this? Why did you do it? 139
Sharon thought a bit. She found this question rather boring and so she yawned.140
She took up her pencil and started to draw a little picture of Anny making eyes at Pigly-loo. She then filled in the answer.141
A: I did not really break Anny’s heart. I cracked it! And it was not really my fault! He was cheating on me with...hmmmm...142
Sharon put down the pencil and thoughtfully scratched her head. Soon her papers were covered in dandruff.143
When she awoke form her daydreaming and head scratching, Mr. Dorfas was standing right in front of her with an angry look on his Miss Dorfas-like face.144
"Why are your papers gone?" he demanded, pulling out his new BB gun in which he was very proud of.145
Sharon looked at her desk. It was true. Now her desk was a pile of dandruff.146
"You have been stealing flour from the store havn't you?" he said. He seemed happy that they had yet another excuse to take Sharon to jail.147
He gathered all of the Dandruff into a bag.148
This will go to my wife so she can bake me a nice cake and since there's so much we shall also make cookies! and, of course, none for the prisoner!" he scornfully teased, as he took the bag to be delivered to his wife.149
But it was then that he noticed the hidden papers.150
"Ha! You thought that you could prevent yourself from filling in the papers so you hid them with what you stole!! AHAHAHAHA!" he laughed and slammed the door.151
Sharon could hear Mr. Dorfas and Timmy's dad fighting outside, most likely for the bag of flour.152
Hours later she heard a loud punch along with a scream by Mr. Dorfas. Apparently, he had lost.153
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Chapter Seven159
The First Question160
Sharon picked up her pencil again.161
Q. 1: We already know that you are guilty of the charges, but we were wondering if there is anything else you would like to confess.162
Sharon drew pictures of herself sticking her tongue out.163
A: Yes, I would like to confess that I have been abused by Timmy's dad, when he grabbed me by the arm and pulled me into the police station. So, I declare that he is also guilty and must be put in jail.164
Sharon smiled with satisfaction.165
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Chapter Eight174
Her First Day In Court.175
Sho and Marina town was busy as a bee. This was the first court case in years and could take decades to be finished.176
The judges, who were, of course, Sho and his dear wife, Marina, were on opposite sides. 177
Sho, as his songs proved, disfavored Sharon very much. Marina, on the other hand, being a good friend of Sharon, had given her lots of advise on how to deliver children, and so she was on Sharon's side.178
The case began.179
Sharon's lawyer was Timmy. She knew not how this came about and she was very distressed, for Timmy had been her chief teaser and had teased her her entire life. This, and, of course, because Timmy was a first-grader. Sharon's prosecuter was, of course, Anny, who was still crying pitifully. 180
There were several witnesses around and other people, such as Sharon's pink-socked father and laundry women mother.181
Sho huriedly banged the hammer to his desk.182
"The court case shall begin now!" he said childishly. A bible was slammed to Sharon's head as she took a seat near the judge.183
"Do you swear to tell the truth and nothing but the truth so help you God?" the book slammer asked. Sharon nodded annoyedly. She then noticed that she was the only one made to swear in the courtroom.184
"Now!" started Sho. Sharon shuddered as she remembered the first time she met him, she was four years old.... She was pulled from her thoughts by Anny's ranting.185
"....she is a naughty girl who left me and broke my heart and broke every inch of my heart! She even broke the bottom of my heart. I felt I would have a heart attack! She hasn't got a heart, does she? She even broke the top of my heart! and the sides too! She black-mailed me and white-mailed me and green-mailed me...." Anny's ranting went on for a few hours and the courtcase made no progress.186
Finally:187
"And she pink-mailed me...." 188
"That is enough, Mr. Skywalker!!" snorted Marina. Anny sat begrudgingly. Sharon was relieved. But, that lasted for a split second as Timmy rose from his little stool and spoke to the judge.189
"I totally agree with all of the accusations! She should go to jail and she should have her ears pulled and her nose bent, 'till she cries like a faucet!!"190
"Why, you said it wrong!" complained Anny. But, it was late now and the rest of the case would have to be continued the next day.191
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Chapter Nine206
Her Second Day In Court.207
"I flatly demand a different lawyer!!" cried Sharon when the case was in session. Sho ignored her happily and all was started.208
"Sharon Skywalker, is it not true that you..."209
"Do not call me Skywalker! I am not a Skyawlker, I am a spy!" Sharon slapped her hands to her mouth. What had she just said?210
"A spy?" Sho said curiously.211
"From a distant town in which the dancer I.P. daily once came. It is a horrible town wich explains this horrible girl!" said Miss Dorfas. 212
Sharon then saw that Anny was making eyes at her.213
"The little liar!" she said engrossed in her anger.214
Miss Dorfas looked at Sharon.215
"I am not lying!" she wailed as she took out a handkerchief to wipe her oncoming tears.216
"It looks as if we have another charge against Sharon!" said Sho.217
"Lying, stealing, heartbreaking, blackmailing, disguising, and now being a SPY!" said Sho loudly.218
Sharon's lawyer, Timmy, nodded eagerly as he munched on his school lunch. Sharon then remembered that she had not been to school in a long time. She would find a new and better school to go to after this nonsense was over.219
"I have an accusation against Anny!" Sharon suddenly said. 220
"You have permission to speak" said Marina. Sho made an angry face.221
"Anny has lied in the court room! He said that I have no heart, but it is scientifically proven that I do have a heart, and without it, I wouldn't be alive! I can feel it beating within me right now." Sharon grabbed Marina's hand and put it to her chest. "See? Can't you feel it! I do have a heart!" she said happily.222
The court room was silent. Everyone was awed at Sharon's wisdom. Sho quickly broke the silence. 223
"So, I see you have learned something in school! But that's not enough. He snorted. You still have quite a few charges against you. So you will spend two days and one hour in jail. And that is final!" he slammed the hammer onto the desk and dented it. "But what about Anny's lie?" Sharon asked. "Won't he get punished too?" 224
"You have a point, Sharon." Marina said, then whispered something in Sho's ear that made him giggle like a girl. 225
"Anny will spend all of tomorrow washing laundry with Sharon's mother. That will be his punishment." Marina said with a smile on her face.226
Sharon was quite disappointed by the unworthy punishment. But at least he's being punished! she thought. 227
"Court dismissed!" Sho said, with another slam of his hammer onto his desk which made another dent. 228
Sho's desk was covered in dents, Sharon noticed.229
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Chapter Ten238
Sharon Goes To Jail239
Sharon was then escorted unwillingly to Timmy’s dad’s police car and driven all the way to his house. As they drove, Timmy, who was sitting in the riders seat, was talking to his dad.240
"I was a good Lawyer, wasn't I dad?" he asked. His father nodded and smirked in the mirror so that Sharon could see.241
In the meantime, Anny was taken to Sharon’s house.242
"Oh! My ex-son-in-law!!" laughed Sharon’s mom as she roughly took Anny by the hand and pulled him through the door and passed a few hallways to the laundry room. "Here!" she pointed at a huge laundry basket with Sharon’s name written on it.243
"Wash these by hand. You will be finished hopefully in a week!" with that said she went off to do her own laundry.244
Anny looked down at the pile of laundry that was higher than his head. Sharon’s mom returned shortly. Anny had barely finished washing a sock when she stacked another basket of clothing next to him.245
"This is all her underclothes!" she explained. "My spoiled daughter has many more baskets for you to wash, don’t worry!!" she winked slyly as she went to get some more. Anny looked distressfully at the basket. All of her clothes had his name on it, she would never wear them again, he thought.246
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Chapter Eleven255
Laundry Washing256
This is so humiliating! Anny thought, as he reached for the next sock. He had just finished washing the first one. Will I become a washer woman like Sharon's mother? Why did Sharon have to break up with me? All this wouldn't have happened if she didn't. we were so happy together. I taught her so many things. Sang her so many songs.....Anny's thoughts were interrupted by another basket being placed by his side. Anny frowned. It would take more than a week to finish all this! Maybe even a year! Anny reached for another dirty piece of clothing. It was her old washable baby diaper. Oh, she must have been so cute when she was a baby. 257
He looked down at the diaper, when he noticed the name "Gollum" on it. 258
Gollum? What could this mean? Was I not her only boy-friend? 259
It looked like he wasn't. Anny slowly, but sadly washed it. The next washable diaper was worn by Sharon when she was five. It had a picture on it that Sharon had drawn with a marker. The picture was of her and Sho.260
Anny shrieked and threw the diaper behind him just when his mother came into the room. It hit her face. 261
"Why, Anny! For that, here's another basket of laundry for you to wash. I never thought you would do such a naughty thing!" She walked out of the room. 262
Anny just sat there in disbelief and shock. He pulled something else out of one of the baskets. It was a shirt of Sharon's. It had a large red heart on it, with the name "Anny" written in the middle of it.263
Finally! he thought, as he happily washed it.264
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Chapter Twelve270
Sharon's room271
This washing continued all day. He wondered when it would end, when Sharon's mother walked in. 272
"It's bed-time Anny! I'll show you to your room." She led him through a hallway where he saw a door-like hole, which was about 4 ft hight and 2 ft wide. He, of course, didn't know what it was for. They went up some stairs, till they came to a room. Sharon's mom opened the door and shoved Anny in. Then she locked him in. Anny looked around the room. He recognized it as Sharon's room. He was overjoyed. He could see the place where she had carved his and her name into her wooden bed. But now he could see that it had several scratches on it. Old memories popped into his head. It was of the time when he was sitting on the tree outside and came into her room through the window. He looked out of the broken window to see if the tree was still there. It was gone. It had been cut down by Sharon's mother who had not wanted her to climb down it anymore. He was very sad. He plopped down onto Sharon's bed and fell asleep.273
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Chapter Thirteen282
Melancholy Anny283
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He awoke the moment he dozed off. Sharon’s mother had returned.285
"I forgot to read you a story! The Princess and the Pea!" 286
"Hurray!!" cried Anny as he sat up in his bed.287
When the story was over Anny yawned.288
"That was a cool story!" said Anny. "Sharon is like the princess!"289
"And you are like the pea!!" giggled Sharon’s mom as she threw the book out of the window and walked to Sharon’s old CD player.290
"Bed time music!" she laughed as she switched on the Cinderella soundtrack.291
"Bibudy! babady..." Sharon’s mother danced out of the room merrily.292
The Cinderella sound track was music to Anny's ears, as it reminded him of his love. He fell into a deep sleep.293
He was awoken immediately by Sharon’s mom storming into the room once again.294
"I am so sorry Anny, I forgot. Boys like rock better then the Cinderella sound track!" she squealed as she replaced the Cinderella sound track with Sho's new rock CD, Sharon’s Going To Jail! He had just completed it a few hours ago and it was already top seller in Sho and Marina Town.295
The music blared all over town, and Anny had his head under the covers. He could not stand such words against his love.296
He cried himself to sleep, only to be awoken yet again!297
"I just remembered that tomorrow is a holiday so you can get up to night and do work till the morning, and then you may sleep!" she said as she pulled Anny out of bed, he was still drowsy but managed to scream as he bonked his head a million times, going down the stairs.298
When his wits returned to him he was standing in front of a huge dish basin full of soapy water.299
Sharon’s mom approached.300
"Finally up! you lazy boy!" she slapped him angrily. "Wash Sharon’s underclothes or else I will wash yours!!"301
Anny immediately started washing.302
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Chapter Fourteen319
The Secret Passageway320
Sharon lay in the basement of Timmy's house. It was used as a cell. Anny was placed in it once for "sock stealing". She was deep in thought. 321
If only Anny hadn't made such a big deal out of this whole thing, I wouldn't be here in this stupid jail! Maybe there's a way to escape! I must find it. I am a secret agent after all. 322
Sharon smirked and snorted as she searched the whole basement for any opening. It was pitch dark. 323
After a two hour search, she finally found an opening in the wall. 324
"I knew I would find one! Ha! Not even Anny is so smart!" She said as she crawled through it. There was a long passageway. Sharon walked down it. She bumped into someone. That someone had a flashlight. It was Timmy. 325
"Ah ha!" he said with a laugh. "The prisoner is trying to escape! I made this secret passageway myself so that you would try to escape, and I could catch you again!" He said with a mouth full of cookies that his mother had made out of Sharon's "stolen" flour. Sharon laughed at him. 326
"Hahaha! Those are my dandruff cookies!" She said. 327
"How dare you lie to me!" Timmy said. "I was going to show you the way out, but now that you insulted me, I don't think I will." Timmy gave Sharon a snort and a nod, and walked off leaving her alone in the dark hallway. She was dismayed. How could she find her way out without Timmy to help her? After all, he knew the house better than anyone.328
She sat down in the tunnel...and waited...and waited...and waited.... She looked up and saw a little light coming down the passageway towards her. 329
Why, that Timmy just never leaves me alone, does he? she thought, as she stood up. 330
"Go away, Timmy!" said Sharon.331
"Sharon? I brought you something to eat." said the person behind the flashlight.332
"I know what you're trying to do." said Sharon. "You're trying to make me eat my dandruff cookies. And you're trying to sound like a girl."333
"But I am a girl." said the voice.334
"Ha! Liar! You should go to jail for that." said Sharon.335
"I am not a boy!" said the person as she came into clear view. 336
"Then who are you?" asked Sharon, a little shocked.337
"Why I'm Timmy's mother, Sharon." Sharon looked embarrassed. "I felt sorry for you, so I brought you some cookies that I made. They're sugarless, so they won't rot your teeth." Said Timmy’s mom with an rotten-tooth smile. Sharon looked relieved. 338
"Why, thank you, Timmy's mom." Sharon said as she grabbed the whole plate of cookies and started gobbling them down. 339
"Oh these cookies are the best! I didn't know dandruff cookies could taste so good!" Sharon said, and finished the cookies in one mouthful. "Oh, I need to know the way out. So I was wondering if you could help me." Said Sharon with a helpless look on her face, which Timmy's mom couldn't see anyway because of the darkness. 340
"Oh, of course! Why don't you come upstairs? I can give you a room to sleep in and give you some more cookies if you like. And I even have your favorite Cinderella sound track! I think it's in Timmy's room." Timmy's mom said, as she led Sharon through the darkness to a stairway. They came up right into Timmy's room. Timmy was sitting on his bed, listening to Sho's new hit song, Sharon Goes To Jail. It was now his favorite song. It was on full blast. 341
"The prisoner has escaped!" He shouted when his mother was gone from the room. "And I will put her in her new cell!" He grabbed Sharon and threw her into his bathroom. 342
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Chapter Fifteen351
Timmy’s Toilet352
Sharon sat tearfully on the dirty toilet seat, it had just been used, obviously. The smell indicated it perfectly. 353
She lifted the toilet seat for no particular reason, and there were some cookies that Timmy had tried to hide.354
"Aha! I found your prized cookies!" laughed Sharon as she gobbled them down, forgetting what they were made of.355
"No!!" Timmy whined angrily. He picked up his favorite teddy bear and threw it at Sharon's crumby mouth. 356
"Uh! AH!" cried Sharon as she lost her balance and fell into the recently used latrine.357
She stood up unhappily, gazing at her wet skirt. "This will not do!" she said shaking her head shamefully. 358
Timmy was out of the room now. He was getting his new puppy dog to scare the little girl in his private toilet away!359
"That is my toilet you're in!" he said, as he unleashed his puppy on Sharon. Sharon threw a crumb of a cookie out of the window; the puppy followed.360
"NO!" screamed Timmy after it. They both fell from the two-story house, thankfully in the still not empty bag of flour that was being kept outside.361
They both got up covered in the flour. "So that’s what makes the cookies taste so good!" Timmy said as he started eating up all the flour. His puppy helped him with the delightful job. 362
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Chapter Sixteen371
Sharon's Escape372
"A hair!" said Timmy shocked as ever. He had found a hair in the flour.373
"Hi Timmy! What are you eating?" asked Miss Dorfas and Pigly-loo, who were walking by his house.374
"This is for me and not for you!" said Timmy as he trid to hide the big bag behind him.375
"It smells like my favorite food! Swine Rump Dandruff!" cried Pigly-loo in her mad dash to get her mouth near the bag.376
Timmy cried in horror. Miss Dorfas went to call the police.377
"Now whats going on?" asked Timmy's dad who came stomping out of the house. He saw Pigly-loo eating their new flour and Timmy and his dog crying a few meters away where they had apparently been kicked.378
"What are you doing, Timmy? Where is Sharon, our prisoner?"379
Timmy wiped away a tear as he ran to his father.380
"Sharon was drinking everything in my private toilet! And I tried to make her leave, but she kicked me out of the window!" he lied. At that moment Sharon ran through Timmy's dad's legs. 381
"There she goes!" said Timmy as Sharon ran and fell into a ditch.382
"Did two days and two hours already pass?" wondered Timmy's dad.383
"I haven't looked at a calendar or clock ever since I was born!" said Timmy as he bonked Pigly-loo's head.384
"Two days and one hour have passed!" assured Miss Dorfas, as she tasted some flour for herself. Timmy snatched the bag away.385
"We should have a town festival for flour!" cried Miss Dorfas, licking her fingers.386
"I don't think two days and one hour have passed yet!" said Timmy’s dad as he walked away from the two.387
"Yay! He will go arrest Sharon again!" laughed Pigly-loo.388
"The wrath of my dad is the scariest thing!" agreed Timmy as he followed his dad, who was chasing Sharon.389
Sharon quickly put on a new disguise and deflated herself into a garbage can.390
"No one will find me here!" she said, a bit too loud.391
"Eeeek! The garbage can is talking!" cried a voice from nearby. 392
"It must be my best friend Katherine!" whispered Sharon.393
"Surprise! My best friend!" yelled Sharon as she popped herself out with the dripping lid on her head.394
Sho looked at Sharon and went speechless.395
"Sho? Where’s Katherine?" asked Sharon.396
"I'm not your best friend!" said Sho, as he walked away. Sharon yawned.397
"I'm gunna go watch The Pink Agent! Its the best movie since Pigly-Boo!" said Sho, pulling out two movie tickets.398
"For me!" Sharon tried to grab one.399
"No, no!" laughed Sho as he stuffed them down his pockets and walked off.400
"Cinderella was so much better then Pigly-Boo!" Sharon screamed after him.401
She sighed. She looked at the ground and saw a Pink Agent movie ticket.402
"Aha! Sho dropped it!" she giggled and ran to the movie theater with the ticket in her hand. 403
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Chapter Seventeen407
Sharon's Stalker408
Sharon sat in her chair at the theater, watching The Pink Agent. She watched intensely during a scene where Matthew McConagy sprayed the Pink Agent with green goo. The Pink Agent wiped her large sunglasses with her hand, and brushed off her pink suit. 409
"I, the Pink Agent, will not stand for this!" said Sayuri, the Pink Agent. But she was only sprayed with goo once more. This time, she fainted into the puddle. Matthew McConagy watched in glee then ran away, sniggering. 410
He's so cool! thought Sharon. I hope I become as good an agent as he is.411
Later, after the movie had finished, Sharon was walking home. She did not notice the strange, dark figure. She was being followed! 412
Sharon snuck into her house through the tiny 2 by 4 ft. hole. She couldn't let her parents see that she had escaped her cell. 413
She went into her room and turned on the Cinderella soundtrack for inspiration.414
"From now, this room will be a room fit for a spy!" she said to herself, as she began redecorating her room.415
Her wardrobe became full of dark, sloppy spy clothing. She remembered how spies always had black windows, so, she replaced the glass with black paper.416
"It's so Japanese!" she said to herself. "Maybe I can be a ninja!" she tore her sloppiest, black piece of clothing into long strips. She wrapped it tightly around her whole body.417
She cackled when she was done.418
"My room is the coolest, ever!" she said, triumphantly. She then realized that she could no longer open her windows. 419
She poked a hole in the paper so that she could see out. She put her eye to the hole. Down below, she saw someone in a black cloak. 420
"Who goes there?" she shouted through the tiny hole. The person below looked around, trying to see who's voice it was. "Tell me!" shouted Sharon.421
"Uh..I, uh. My name is Anny Skywalker." said the person. "Who are you?"422
"I am Agent S. Ex-wife of Sho and ex-wife of YOU!" she shouted angrily.423
"Sharon? Where are you?" said Anny. He looked frightened.424
Sharon snorted. "As if I would tell you. You little liar!" 425
"You broke my heart!" shouted Anny. "You even broke the top of my heart! Even the bottom. And the sides---"426
"SHUT UPPP!" shouted Sharon. She was a little embarrassed about her outburst. "You'll wake everyone." she quickly said. Anny looked even more frightened.427
"Are you...a ghost?" he asked.428
"No! Stupid!" she said. "I am an agent! I'm hiding, of course."429
"Oh." said Anny, relieved. "Wait! Aren't you supposed to be in jail?"430
"I most cunningly found a cunning way to escape!" said Sharon, proudly. "And aren't you supposed to be washing laundry?" she asked.431
"I...escaped...too." said Anny, as quietly as possible. Somehow Sharon still heard him.432
"HA! You're no better than me!" she said. She danced around for a little bit on her bed, then went back to the hole.433
Just then, Anny heard something. It was music. But not just any music, it was the Cinderella soundtrack that Sharon always listened to. And as Anny wasn't completely stupid, he realized that it was coming from above. From Sharon's room!434
"Sharon? Are you in your room?" he asked, suspiciously. Sharon bit her nails nervously.435
"No." she squeaked.436
"Fine. Since I'm supposed to sleep in your room, I think I'll go to bed now. I'm pretty tired." said Anny, as he yawned.437
"No!" shouted Sharon. "I mean.... Aren't you supposed to be running away?"438
"Oh yeah.... Where do I sleep?" he wondered aloud. 439
"At home with your mommy." said Sharon.440
"No! She'll see me and send me back! And your mom will play Sho's latest CD in your room all night long...and...and." Anny put his face in his hands.441
Suddenly, a thought popped into Sharon's high-tech brain. 442
"If you help me, I'll help you." she said to Anny. Anny looked up.443
"What do you mean?" he asked.444
"If you help me escape Sho and Marina Town, then I will help you hide from everyone." said Sharon. "Deal?"445
Anny wiped the sweat off of his forehead.446
"Deal." he said. "Now come down before you give me a heart attack on top of it being broken."447
"Fine, just let me pack." she said, as she began loading herself with hand-made spy equipment. She replaced her "ninja" garments with Katherine's new, leather agent suit.448
"I made it myself." she said to Anny, when he complimented it. They both ran off into the night.449
450
451
452
453
454
Chapter Eighteen455
Escape Plans456
"Where are we going?" asked Anny, as they were running.457
"To the tree in Central Park." said Sharon. "No one will find us there!" she cackled.458
Anny's expression was one of dismay. He and Sharon had spent some of their most romantic moments in that tree. He wiped away a small tear, as they entered the park.459
When they got to the tree, Sharon threw a stick at Anny's head.460
"OUCH!" he shouted, as he felt the growing lump.461
"That's for the time you threw a stick at me! Right under this very tree!" she said, as she tried to climb the tree.462
"I never---" Anny suddenly remembered that he had thrown a stick at Sharon. "But it was only to get your attention!" he said in his defense. Sharon seemed not to notice. She was struggling to climb the tree, but she had no tree-climbing skills.463
"Let me help you." said Anny. He hoped it might win Sharon back to him. But Sharon only used him as a stool, and after an hour, she finally got up into the tree. Anny sadly followed. 464
"Now, for my plan." said Sharon.465
"What about my plan?" asked Anny.466
"You thought of a plan? AHAHAHAHA!" Sharon laughed for no good reason. She didn't really have a plan herself, she was only trying to sound smart. "Well, then smarty-pants, what's your plan?" she said.467
"Well first, we---"468
"I think that's stupid." said Sharon, who wasn't even listening.469
"Well, do you have a better plan?" asked Anny. He was deeply offended.470
"Of course I do!" said Sharon. 471
"What is it then?" asked Anny.472
"It's very smart, unlike yours." said Sharon, proudly. Though she had nothing to be proud about.473
"What is it?" he asked again.474
"Stop being so impatient!" she said.475
"Well, we don't have so much time!" said Anny. "What are you waiting for?"476
"I...uh...I forgot to do my stretches today!" Sharon lied. Anny sighed as Sharon stood up on the branch, and tried to balance. 477
"Aaaaagghh!" shouted Sharon, as she fell down to the ground. She hit it with a hard thump. Anny was horrified. 478
"Are you O.K., Sharon?" he asked, worriedly. He didn't know that Sharon had fallen off of many trees and was used to the thump at the end.479
"Of course I'm fine." she said, haughtily. She stood up. Her face was spotted with dirt. 480
Anny was about to sing a song about it, when he remembered that they weren't together anymore. 481
"Help me, you dummy!" she said. Anny quickly and clumsily climbed down from the tree. 482
Once again, he was Sharon's stool. And after an hour, they finally got up again.483
"So, what's your plan?" asked Anny.484
"It's a perfect plan." said Sharon, who still didn't have a plan.485
"What is it?" asked Anny. He was getting annoyed now.486
"I can't tell you." said Sharon.487
"Why not?" whined Anny.488
"Because...it's a...surprise!" said Sharon, as she lightened up. "You'll just have to trust me!" she said. Anny decided that her plan was probably better than his, so he thought he should trust her.489
"Fine, I will." said Anny. 490
"Good!" said Sharon.491
They both climbed down and spent the night at the foot of the tree.492
493
494
Chapter Nineteen495
The Great Escape496
The next day:497
"Agh!" said Sharon, as she slapped Anny, who was still sleeping.498
"What?" he said, angrily.499
"We overslept!" she shouted. "We have to go NOW!" 500
"Ah...uh...O.K.!" said Anny, sleepily. He got up. Sharon dragged him out of the park. Sharon somehow, without a plan, got them both out of Sho and Marina Town without getting caught. 501
"And this is where we part!" said Sharon, happily. 502
"What?" said Anny.503
"You were only going to help me escape. And we escaped." said Sharon. "Bye-bye, Anny!"504
"Bye, Sharon!" said Anny, sadly. 505
Sharon cackled and ran off in the direction of the nearest town. But she did not know that it was the town where I. P. Daily had come from and where he now resided.506
As she travelled, she did not notice the dark figure that followed her all the way. 507
508
Chapter Twenty509
The Town 510
What Sharon first noticed was the huge number of rivers cutting the town in several places. Deep yellow rivers she thought she saw a long time ago. 511
Hmmm....I think I remember this aroma! She was soon crossing oddly designed bridges and passing disco style houses. Music of every loud sort was filling the air and sky above! 512
"This is sooo my type of town!!" Sharon said, at the same moment she felt a hard pinching slap on her rump. 513
"Eeewwww....EEEK!!" She spun and repeated her shriek so perfectly it sounded like a replay. Someone extremely Principal Billy-like was behind her, he had enormous hands that twitched.514
"You will pay! I will spy on your ugly face for life Principal Billy!!"Sharon stormed, she was very angry that she had been out-spied by a non-spy.515
"He's no Principal!! AHAHAHAHAhahahah!" giggled a gurggling woman with a toothbrush in her mouth. 516
"Miss Dorfas?" Sharon actually hid behind the Principal Billy look-alike.517
"One of the them!" sung the the woman, bubbles popped out of her mouth and she gurggled another note.518
"Laalalala!!" 519
It was then that Sharon noticed that everytime someone moved in this town the beat of the ever-lasting music would get louder and faster.520
"SHAAAAAAAAAAROOOOOOONNN,......GOOOES TO JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIL!!!" the second Miss Dorfas screamed, the chorus of the new hit song...it had already made its way to this neighboring town!521
Sharon contemplated it all and then decided: This is the town where all the relatives of my town live! Miss Dorfas's sister! Principal Billy's brother! and its to avoid confussion!! Then that meansss....522
"I must have a relative here!!" leaving the two, now dancing, disgusting people, she ran for the next street.523
Her eyes spun in circles. Houses, houses, houses!! Green, pink, blue, orange! every bright color! And every house had its own dancing, robotic CD player that was shaped as a....524
Sharon's short-cut braids flew up in the air in shock. 525
"N...NO!" she moped, disappointment over disbelief. But, then, there were many advantages of being a Spy in a high-tech town.526
"I will hack this town away from that party pooper dancer!" she pulled out her pliers and pinchers and donned protective goggles.527
But then,528
"...with a pick and hammer,529
bonker and rammer, 530
she destroyed my heart,531
and shot it with a dart!532
AND SHE WEEENT TOOO JAILLLLL...533
AND SHE WEEEENT TOO JAIILLLL...534
Breaking every law,535
with her talking jaw,536
and everything she saw,537
she destroyed with her claws..."538
I. P. Daily came up behind Sharon. He was holding a dancing, robotic CD player. It was blasting Sho's latest hit song. 539
Sharon screamed loudly and grabbed the CD player away from him. She began smashing it with her pliers and pinchers, which, of course, she did not know how to use properly. Anyway, it did the job. The CD player now had wires sticking out of odd places and its face was smashed in. 540
"A well-done job, I should say." said Sharon, as she threw the junk at I. P. Daily, who was so stunned with shock, that even his wet dancing couldn't help it.541
542
543
Chapter Twenty-One544
The Relative545
"Sharon?" came a voice from behind her. Sharon turned around and saw an old lady, leaning on a cane.546
"Who and what are you?" asked Sharon, who had never seen anything so wrinkled besides Golly.547
"Why, I'm your grandmother! And you needn't be so rude." said the old lady. Sharon's jaw dropped. She stood up. Her grandmother put her arm around her.548
"So," she said. "Tell me about your lovelife with Anny." obviously, her news was very out-dated. Sharon's face burned.549
"I'm not with stupid Anny anymore!!" she shouted. "Besides, he---" Sharon caught herself before she publically announced anything about her going to jail. "He was cheating on me." she said quickly.550
"How awful!" said her grandmother. "Why don't you stay with me? and you can tell me all about it later over some tea and cookies."551
"Fine." said Sharon, who was eager to get off the wet streets.552
They were both soon sitting at a table by a fireplace, which was not lit. 553
"Here, have some of my cookies." said the grandmother, as she pushed a plate of cookies towards Sharon.554
"What are they made of?" asked Sharon, suspiciously. She wanted to make sure they weren't made of any kind of natural resources.555
"Natural flour! Shipped straight from Sho and Marina Town." exclaimed the grandmother. The half-bitten cookie dropped from Sharon's mouth.556
"So, you wanted to hear about how I broke up with Anny?" said Sharon quickly to change the subject.557
"Oh yes, of course." said the grandmother. "Do tell."558
"Well," started Sharon. "It all started when...." Sharon began to recall the story of the pink sock, Anny going to jail, her breaking up with him and becoming a spy, the courtcase, herself going to jail, then, both of them escaping Sho and Marina Town. 559
"Oh, how terribly romantic." said the grandmother.560
"Yuck!" said Sharon. "That's the reason I broke up with Anny. Of course, I will find a new boyfriend in time." she cackled and choked on her tea. 561
"Well," said the grandmother. "You'd best be getting to bed. You look exhausted."562
"I am not." said Sharon, as she fell asleep in her chair.563
564
Chapter Twenty-Two565
Betrayal566
Sharon awoke, to find herself strapped tightly to a chair. She shrieked when she saw Timmy's dad pacing the room. 567
"Ah, finally awake." said Timmy's dad. Sharon looked to her side and saw that Anny was also tied to a chair. But he was still asleep.568
"Yes, I caught your little partner in crime as well." said Timmy's dad. "I found him on the road near this town."569
Sharon's eyes narrowed, when she looked at Anny. Following me!! she thought in anger.570
"But...how did you know I was here?" asked Sharon. That's when the grandmother came in. 571
"Oh, dear. It looks like your cover has been blown!" she said with a laugh.572
"Why, you!!" said Sharon, as she struggled in her ropes. Her mechanical braid shot up into the air and back down. It was then that Anny awoke. 573
"Sharon!" he exclaimed. "I...I didn't know this would happen. What are you going to do to us?" he asked Timmy's dad, helplessly.574
"I'm taking you both back to Sho and Marina Town. Sharon, to finish her last hour in jail, and you, Anny, to finish washing your last pile of laundry. He laughed, insanely, as he dragged them both to his car. 575
"You will pay for this someday!!" shouted Sharon to her grandmother, as they drove off. The car coughed out bunches of black smoke into the grandmother's face.576
She tripped on her cane, as she walked into her house.577
I'm tired of running away like this. Thought Sharon. I'll never be an agent again.578
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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I wasn't reading your story. I was commenting your story. It's very very very very VERY good
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Speechless
Okay, reading this years later, I honestly DONT remember the Last Half at ALL!!
and gaud its looong.
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I thought it was.....less funnier than your HP spoof...
beginning: , language: , plot: , overall: 6/10, ending: , dialog: , characters: .
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Yeah the change makes it a bit more difficult to work with, but I've decided to one of the few optimistic ones about it.
language: 4, plot: 3, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 4.
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Help!
I...don't...like...this...new...precious...site!!!!!@#$^%#$%. -
Shocked
You've just pushed J.K. Rowling and her other counterparts of "Childrens-books-writers" into a shadow of shame. "Aha! So this is what RowLing was copying allllll alooong...!"
nYAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH! -
Yeah! If it werent fer ur granny....U wouldnt b born!!
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HAHAHAHA. You're a little meanie!!
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I do! I ment be thankful you DON'T have one.
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??!?? Do you not have grandmothers?? Or at least one?
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Be thankful.
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I have no grandmother at all! hehe.
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What mean grandmother! I have no grandmother as this! lol!
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clap clap clap! You're killing me with these!
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