That Girl

She stared out of the window, occasionally taking a toke on her cigarette just letting the words of the person beside her wash over her. She knew what it was all about, every so often the story would change but she knew them all by heart. Complaining about this and that mostly about her father, this didn't bother her at all as she had lost all feeling for her family, well everyone apart from her sister she wasn't sure if she loathed her or just appreciated her probably both.1

The car pulled up outside the school, another day of hell was waiting for her inside those gates. Another day when smiling was all she had to do to keep people happy, but kill herself. It was strange how she never managed to find a way to be herself. She knew that if she was show people they would do what they did before, push her away and make her feel like nothing. The difference this time would be that she already knew she was nothing and needed know help in figuring it out 24/7.2

She'd taken the money her mother had given her, and was just crossing the road, another car almost hit her, 'What's new' she said to herself as she walked through the gates to her hell, but then a thought crossed her mind what if this was her purgatory, between hell which was home and a heaven she had yet to find. 'All i have to do is keep smiling' But as she said this a tear ran down her cheek, she wiped it away and told herself to keep going, not to be stupid she had no reason to cry.3

As she was sat sorting out her books at her locker another tear ran down her cheek, then another and before she knew it she was in tears, they wouldnt stop coming. She picked herself up quickly and ran outside took a few deep breaths then ran back inside to the toilets and was sick. 'Whats wrong with me' she thought, then she realised she had thought she had no reason to cry that morning but really she'd had a reason to cry every morning the thing was i'd been keeping it all inside.4