Appleberry Blossoms

Appleberry Blossoms1

There was one house up the holler past ours. That’s where Junie Appleberry lived. We walked out of the holler, crossed the crick at the mill dam and caught the school bus to Bullards High. The kids at Bull**** (nic name) gave us he**.2

…. “When yall getting’ married”… “Junie’s  got a feller”… Junie would put her hands where her hips were gonna be someday an’ shout… “Hush up Pauley Fernwhite” an’ “Hush up Tommy Biggers”…..I  had a different approach…I’d rock ‘em. Somebody spread fresh rocks in the parkin’ lot every year. They’d be just waitin’ fer me first semester. By Thanksgivin’ I’d purty much cleaned the parkin’ lot an’ the teasin’ had mostly stopped.3

Then senior year the teasin’ stopped completely…fer Junie. Seems like durin’ the summer (while I wasn’t lookin’) Junie had found what all us kids had been lookin’ fer…had a place to set them hands now too! For me the teasin’ got worse. Got to know the principals office real good… “fightin’ agin young man”?  Me vs the senior class wasn’t much fight…it was more like that hug you get from Gran’ma at Christmas…you know it’s comin’ …you know it’s gonna be bad…but you step up an’ take it.4

It was tough bein’ associated with the only developin’ female in the whole darn school. All the boys talked about stuff  I didn’t even know about (had to pretend I did)…rest of the girls stopped talking to me at all. They kept their distance from Junie too, which put her even closer to me. We didn’t talk much walkin’ up the holler after school  any more, an’ I started walkin’ in front a lot…kept me from fallin’ down so much. Walkin’ behind her had got kinda  hipnotic ....stuuuupid.....stuuuuupid, you’re getting very stuuuupid.......you are going to fall down....SPLAT!!!!!!!5

By Thanksgivin’ it was gettin’ harder for Junie to keep her balance ...ahem...so I had all but quit pushin’ her down the steps at the cafeteria...but for some reason she was always waitin’ to see if I was goin’ to.6

The bell rung fer Christmas break an’ I reckon everbody  was in a big hurry to get home...even Junie. As we passed the mill, Junie slipped and purty nigh did a head stand in the mill pond (durn slacks)!....got her blouse all wet an’ some things the boys had been talkin’ about became a lot clearer!!! I gave Junie my plaid outing shirt an’ she stepped behind the mill to change. Felt a little guilty fer not tellin’ her about that third button. Top button unbuttoned is totally acceptable...even fer a girl...second button unbuttoned just means you’re good natured an’ playful....third button unbuttoned...you’re goin to hell!!! Well I’d been meanin’ to tell Maw to tighten’ that button up a might, just couldn’t remember it when I wasn’t wearin’ it. Well I wasn’t wearin it now an’ Junie’s soul was hangin’ by a thread...so to speak.7

Junie asked if I could walk on up to her house to get my shirt...an’ I might of answered her...I dunno...my mind had started goin’ back an’ hangin’ around the mill pond.8

When we got to Junies’ house, Mr. Appleberry was a loadin’ Junies’ Mom, May, up in the Hudson for a trip to the Top Value Stamp store to do a little Christmas shoppin’. Never knowed Mr. Appleberry’s name fer sure. He worked down at the ESSO station an’ ever time he came home his shirt said somethin’ different...Harry, Claude, Benny...this identity thing worried me some, I always kept a watchful eye on Mr. Appleberry. Anyway they told Junie they’d be back in a couple of hours an’ not to start supper fer a while. (Yall think you know where this is goin’ don’t you?...mebe...mebe not.9

Junie said come on in, she was goin’ to make a sandwich to hold her ‘til supper. I set down at the kitchen table to wait fer my shirt. Junie made two fine peanut butter an’ jelly sandwiches an’ set ‘em both side by each on the table in front of me. From experience gained by many years of eating, I was able to take a bite of mine. Junie crossed the kitchen from the icebox with a tall glass of milk in each hand. As she reached over my shoulder to set one down...yall done forgot about that loose button, didn’t ye? Well there it went, popped right off in my glass of milk...an’ I was face to face with a bossom!...a bare bossom nestled in outing...my outing...I choked so hard peanut butter came out my nose...ahak, ahak, ahak....ahuk, ahuk, ahuk...no air....inhale...e.  AHAK, ahak, ahak...light headed...inhale...e. Ahak, ahuk....no air....gettin’ dark...inhale...e (you might take notice that them inhale e’s are few an’ far between). Ahak, ahak, ahak...where’d she go? Inhale..ee...inhale...eee...fog lifted a little....ahaka, hunka, hunka...eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!10

Junie was back now, with a dish towel pattin’ the peanut butter drool off my “T” shirt an’ sayin’ somethin about cleaning the kitchen walls later.  I could finally see agin’ so I grabbed the the glass of milk...dook...dook...dook...button....AAAAAAAHAAAAAK, AHAAK, AHAKA....e. I tried to stand so’s I could bend over an’ die...I mean cough....Junie grabbed me from behind, picked me plumb off the floor, an’ squeezed...EXHALE...e... (where’d that come from)? Anyway the button came with it...followed by lunch, breakfast, an’ some of what looked like last months turkey!!! Kinda cleared my windpipe, though.11

Just when I’d got a little breath back I turned to apologize to Junie fer the mess...GOOD LORD...CLEAVAGE....THEY WAS TWO OF ‘EM!!!  AHAAAK....AHAK...AHAK... SNORK.....e.12

We never found the button an’ didn’t speak much about it agin’. Maw sewed one on wash day...it didn’t match.13

School took up agin’ after the first o’ the year. I spent the first day back tryin’ to avoid Junie. I was still real uncomfortable around that girl. Last period, just before the bell, a note, all wadded up in a ball, bounced off my head an’ landed on my desk. I spread it out on my knee...it was Junies’ writin’...said “button, button, who’s got the button?...14

...AAAAAAAHAAAAAAAK, AHAK,AHAK!!!!!!!!!!!15