Who am I?1
Forever young, 2
Eternally innocent,3
Infinitely hopeful.4
Yet without an identity,5
Without a true name, 6
Unable to describe the self7
In the words of others.8
Incomplete,9
Imperfect,10
Unsure.11
Names hold power.12
Names describe our entire being,13
Our purpose,14
Our soul.15
Know my name,16
And in doing so, know me.17
Who am I?18
Kid Chameleon.19
Author notes
Written in english class, I was going through a tough time and needed to reassert myself in my own head. Here's what I came up with.
A contest entry
- Another all poems (I love poems) by jtnbuck.
125 points, ended April 16, 2007, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Publishable Poems? by Bitter Irony.
300 points, ended July 2, 2007, 42 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Help me find out who I am.
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
-
This was very creative, and unfortunetly I can relate to this.
-
So creative I liked this
-
O.o This is pretty deep, levels wise. I can actually get what you feel here, I feel like that right now....
Good poem. : -
Wow, this was pretty good! You definitely have talent! Everything flowed nicely and you brought up some interesting points!
Kudos,
Jazzy
-
Hmm...
I can't really understand it, but yet I'm drawn to it...Good job.
*Frozen Angel* -
Yes. Interesting speculation. But I would ask myself this: Why should this be construed as a poem? What makes this poetry?
BTW, I don't think "names describe our entire being... our purpose, our soul," Think again. How about a little thing like DEEDS?
GA -
^o^
Awesome work! I like the line breaks of the poem and how it speaks the reader. Good luck in the contests!
-
Ha ha, really nice.. I would like you to do a variation of this poem, centered maybe around the changing aspect of the chamlelon.. very great piece tho
-
That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. :-)
I like the way you listed certain characteristics in groups of three: young, innocent and hopeful: incomplete, imperfect and unsure: being, purpose and soul.
I suggest not capitalizing the first word of every line. Try this: write out your poem without line breaks, and punctuate it so that it makes sense in paragraph form.
Also, work on subtlty. Your poem would work very well to say a lot in few wors, if only you'd let it. Take out parts such as "Unable to describe the self," which sounds like a psychological diagnosis, and "Names describe our entire being," which sounds like a line from a text book. Don't explicitly spell out what you want to say: let it become clear throughout the poem.
Thanks for entering the contest, and good luck!beginning: 3, language: 3, plot: 3, ending: 3, dialog: 2, characters: 4.
-
wow very good and good luck in my contest i liked this alot good job and god bless
-
cool, true names do make a personality, but a name might mean one thing to some one and comething completely different to someone else depending on thier experince.
Adding your comment:
1 - 11 of 11
