Agwe's Daughter

[Agwe, Asaka, Erzulie, and Papa Ge are all the gods from the broadway musical, Once On This Island]1

Being the daughter of the god of water, Agwe, there is always someone watching. I mean, I’m a daughter of a god, I’m practically royalty. Well, that was pretty stupid. I am above royalty. I’m Agwe’s daughter, Aquana. 2

You know what drives me crazy? Day and night I hear the crying of islanders singing “Asaka grow me a garden. Please Agwe don’t flood my garden. Erzulie who will my love be? Papa Ge don’t come around me.” I mean, I know Asaka. Mother of Earth. She’s only gonna grow you that garden if you work for it. Get off your lazy a* and plant a seed! Agwe rarely floods, and Erzulie, the Goddess of Love, will only bring you love if she knows of a perfect match. She’s more of a matchmaker then a cupid. And that Papa Ge. He’s really quite nice, not that horrid Demon of Death everyone makes him seem like. He’ll take you when it’s your time.3

And ya know that Ti Moune everyone’s talking about? How great she is and that whole Daniel-Ti Moune-Andrea love triangle? Bull. If Daniel really loved Ti Moune, he would of ditched that prissy Andrea long ago. And want to know the real truth? Ti Moune is a real btch herself. I met her before the gods turned her into a dmn tree. Who the hll turns into a tree? The gods can be dumb.4

You know why lightning isn’t striking me for dissing the gods? Well, I’m Aquana, Aqwe’s daughter. And you know what? I wanna kill Agwe and my stupid-a mother, Erzulie, that’s right, Agwe and Erzulie are having sx, for naming me Aquana. 5

Who the f*k is named Aquana? 6