Tout Que J'ai Besion Est Vous 32

You lay in bed after he had gone to the restroom and came back. You squished yourself against the wall so the two of you could lay. It was around nine o’clock and you had no clue where you were. You just looked at him. Remembering the night you had hung out with him after he left practice. The night you both drank. And made out it was beautiful. And this could become just like that. 1

* I love you.* Gerard whispered and then slowly brought his face close to yours and brushed his lips to your own. you smiled slightly but closed your eyes. *Is that all? You’re not going to say anything back?*2

*I can’t.* you whispered back. * I don’t know.* you said looking back up in his sad hazel eyes. 3

*It took me forever to come to terms too. I love you with all my heart and all the shit I’ve done in the past. I want it to stay there. Will you be my girlfriend?* he asked tilting up your chin to look him in the eye. 4

*I don’t know. I’m just really confused at the moment and there’s a lot on my mind. Can I tell you tomorrow?* he just sighed and put on a half hearted smile. 5

*Sure, but only if it’s ‘yes’.* he turned around and looked at you again. You looked back just in time to watch him lean down once more for a kiss. You reluctantly pulled away and watched as Gerard gave you a small frown and leave the bunk area.  You thought for a moment. If you dated him. You’d have that feeling. The feeling of security, the one that told you, you were safe. The one that told you someone was there, the one that made you know you weren’t alone.  You had never felt that way towards Frankie, or anybody else. It was only Gerard who could give you that.  But you didn’t understand. Though Gerard could give you love, and security. There was one guy you went to for wisdom and advice. Ray. Ray was like your big brother. And treated you that way.  He used to put gummy worms into your drink so when one got in your mouth your freak out. He’d trip you here and there but never enough to make you fall. he was always the first to consol you if anything bad happened. You got up and went to his bunk whispering his name before pulling opened the curtain. He was still sleeping and looked like a puppy.6

*Ray?*  you watched as his eyes fluttered open and his head flop over rot the side to look at you. Still in a sleepy daze.7

*Yeah?* he whispered pulling himself up to his shoulders and finally sitting up completely and patting the bed so you can sit next to him.8

*Should I trust Gerard?* you came right out and asked it. There was no point in beating around the bush and frankly you didn’t have the patience to today. Ray seemed shocked at the question and thought for a moment.9

*Yes. You should. Even though the things he does don’t always seem to make sense. They make sense to him and if he did do something to hurt you. He never directly comes out to intentionally hurt someone and if he does. He really does get sorry. And he apologizes. I guess ever since the Japan incident he’s been sure to take things like a man and own up to his imperfections. I guess you could say he wants to be seen as more responsible then he really is.  You should trust him seeing that he’s trying to do all this to make you happy.  He really does love you. Its just kinda hard for him to show it ya know?” Ray smiled at you and patted you on the head. *What’s for breakfast?*  no matter what it was whenever you talked to Ray about one of your problems. He always made you feel better in the end. 10

*Depends on what you’re cooking!* you laughed and walked with him into the ‘living room’ you see all the guys chatting with random banter about “which Super villain and superhero would you be?”  you came in and sat next to Gerard who was explaining his point that Wolverine was originally a villain and gradually turned into a super hero. Which made you laugh because he was am X-men Junkie. 11

*Gerard will you draw me something?* you ask after the debate seemed to stop.12

*Sure what do you want?* you smiled at him13

*I don’t care something cute.* you moved out of the booth so he could go get a piece of paper and a pen.14

*So would you be?* Mikey asked with a very bad  case of bed head.15

*Um for a super villain I’d probably be either Inque (Ink) or Penguin from batman and for a super hero, I dunno. I don’t really see myself saving people in need. I can see myself causing them problems but not helping them.* you laughed and  Gerard pushed toward you a picture of a humungous ‘lucha Luncheon;’ hugging a very toothy Breakfast Monkey.  You laughed and gave him a hug and whispered in his ear. 16

*Yes.* he looked at you and stared at you cautiously. His own eyes seeming to ask ‘Really?’ you nodded your head and he tilted his head to the side and pressed his lips to yours, slowly pushing you down until you were laying down fully. . You smiled into his mouth and melted into him. Letting him do what he wanted. He had his hand cradling your cheek pulling you gently into the kiss and his other hand was holding up his body as he licked gently at your lip. You were lost. Lost in him worse than you had ever been before. Though your eyes were closed you could see him. Your mouth opened slowly to let your tongue meet. You both stayed in that position, caressing each others tongues and your hand one against his chest and the other in his hair twirling the dyed black strands through your fingers. You were lost and you knew he was too. But you didn’t care. You loved him. He loved you. And if you both were lost. Then you wouldn’t have it any other way.  Time was gone everything was black, there was only you and him. And the sparks flaring all over you body. But after five minutes you opened your eyes and moved your head a bit stopping the kiss. Gerard looked down at you with a huge grin on his face. And mouthed ‘I Love You.’ you both sat up short of breath to the shocked looked of Mikey and Frankie and a smirk of Ray. The hilarious Bob who had covered his eyes and was now peeking through gaps between his fingers. You looked at Gerard who had a goofy look on his face and started laughing which spread through all the guys.17