The Land of Purple Lima Beans

I once found a purple Lima bean. It was so pretty. I didn't want to eat it. Unfortunately, my parents insisted that it was a normal green Lima bean intended for eating. So they made me eat it. And I was forced to give it to my dog. That's what Lima beans are for? Are they not? To feed your dog who is under the table. I was very disappointed that this bean should go to waste. Then I realized that if there was one purple Lima bean there had to be more! This made me very glad, for I had been grieving for quite some time about my poor little bean. And the trouble and indigestion it had caused my dog. It was late though and dark outside. So my search for the 'Land Of Purple Lima Beans' would have to wait until the next day. It was a glorious time when my summer days seemed to last for ever even though they came to an end. And so I went to bed content with the fact that the very next day I would become famous for discovering 'The Land OF Purple Lima Beans'. (I had no intention of eating them for they were too rare and disgusting to eat.)1

I rose before dawn and jumped out of bed, not forgetting my quest for a moment. Purple Lima beans were growing somewhere and I had to find them! I used my logic. Since green Lima beans grow from the soil the purple ones must grow in the clouds with only the rainbows to water them. Logic is most often confused with being the opposite of imagination. They are in fact very closely related. I had to first find a rainbow to climb up. I asked my mom when the next rainstorm would be. She was at the time doing the dishes and insisted to tell me to go ask my father. Obeying, I asked my dad. He was at that time watching something I couldn't care less about on TV and insisted that I quit pestering him and go ask my mother. Frustrated that I had run out of recourses I did the only thing I could think of. I stayed in the room with my father and pretended to watch the show with him. Every time I had done this he had fallen asleep. It was only a matter of time before he did this time. In the meantime I daydreamed about where to start my search for the Purple Lima Beans. Eventually as I had predicted my father fell asleep and it was my turn with the remote. I slipped it ever so gently out of his hand and pushed the MUTE button. I clicked the up arrow on the channels button until I came to the desired station. The Weather Channel. Normally a very boring thing to watch, but this time it was necessary. I turned the volume on very low. I sat about an inch away from the screen with my ear pressed next to the speaker. 'Partly cloudy today and a slight chance of rain tomorrow, but after that watch out! A whole week of summer thunder storms!' Yes! That was it! I heard my dad snore so I quickly turned it back to his channel and placed the remote on his lap. The Land of Purple Lima Beans was going to have to wait for me for a while, but in the meantime I would be able to prepare for my journey and maybe get a chocolate chip cookie. Mom was baking again!2

The days passed slowly as summer days do when you are young and I spent those days wisely. Doing things that normal children do during the summer. Like watch TV, play outside, complain of boredom, suddenly find something to do when mom suggests cleaning. You know, normal things. 3

I arose one morning to thunder outside my widow. Yes! I thought. This was it! Soon a rainbow would appear and I would be able to find 'The Land of Purple Lima Beans'. The rain lasted a few hours before quieting down slightly, so Mom permitted me to go outside. And that's when I saw it! A faint glimmer of color. A rainbow! I climbed up it. I really did! It was there and I used it as if it were a ladder. When I reached the peak of the rainbow I looked down and saw what I thought to be the whole world. It couldn't the whole world though, I mean, come on, if it had been the whole world I would have been able to see Disneyland. And I couldn't. I turned in the other direction and saw a marvelous sight! It was 'The Land of Purple Lima Beans'! I grabbed up and armful and tasted one for experimentation. BLECH! It was still a vegetable. I slid down the rainbow with both my hands full of purple Lima beans. I reached the earth just in time. Mom was calling me. I was delighted. Now she would have to believe me! I showed her the purple Lima beans. And told her about my fantastic journey. It relived me so when Mom believed me. She said that if I didn't mind could we cook the beans. I agreed to her proposition on the condition that I didn't have to eat any. She told me that it was either peas or beans. I chose peas.4

When we were eating dinner and I was beaming with pride at how Mom and Dad loved the purple Lima beans and were saying that I must get them more sometime I spotted something peculiar on my plate. It was a blue pea. I wondered were blue peas would grow. Well, obviously this journey would take me to the cold, blue wonderland of Antarctica.5