Equations

The picture slowly fell through time and space…1

Not long ago, or at least not long ago by the measure of time the picture fell through, a man had at last discovered the answers. The answers to life’s greatest questions. 2

Not every question, of course, just the greatest ones.3

But great by what measure? This was the problem the man encountered when he first began on his little ‘project’. Of course he wanted the answers to the greatest questions of all time, but in order for him to even begin to discover them, he had to know precisely what he was looking for.4

It was much like solving an equation: He had to have every other piece of information. You very well can’t solve x+yz÷a2-b=c. However, for x+3X 4÷22-1=7, one could logically conclude that x=5. 5

He finally decided that the greatest questions had to be those that were most frequently asked, such as, “What is the point of living?” or “Is there a god?”6

After much consideration, however, he found that the answers to the most frequently asked questions would not necessarily provide deep insight, but instead provide answers he could obtain by ordinary means. After all, the most frequently asked questions were usually “What time is it?”, “Where is the bathroom?”, and “When’s lunch?”7

No, these questions would not yield the answers he sought after. 8

He then decided it would have to be the most important questions, but this naturally led to “Important by whose measure?”9

At last he found it, though. Through a bit of thinking and a stroke of luck he concluded he would ask a specific question, one that would yield a specific answer. He thought himself quite clever for finding this solution. So he wrote on a piece of paper, in neat little bold letters:10

”By what measure of greatness would the greatest questions of all time grant the questioner deep insight as to what the of life was, is, and forever will be?”11

He then began to work on converting the question into numerical form, and once that was done he proceeded to solve the equation that now lie before him. He wasn’t happy with this, though. He wasn’t happy because the number “39” couldn’t be converted to a full statement. He must have done something wrong. He tried again. 23. Now he knew he was doing something wrong. He tried again. 46. 12

He kept trying until it nearly drove him mad. The only thing keeping him sane was the idea of accomplishment. It was at this point when he noticed something he had not noticed before: Although each answer was different, they followed through a specific pattern. Then, using the same method as before, he converted the numerals into alphabetic form. 13

And there it was. It was a simple answer, but one that worked. He was somewhat… Disappointed… By the simplicity of the statement. He kept in mind, though, that he’d only done half the work. 14

He furrowed his brow in concentration as he began to reword the next question so it would yield a specific answer. It took him three days. 15

Three days sitting in his basement, which was lit by a single light bulb. His basement had the most room, and was thus best suited for this. He was surrounded by books on mathematics, space/time theories, and of course philosophy. 16

He wouldn’t need them, though.  Not if this worked. He wrote it down, slowly, and checking it carefully so as to avoid mistakes. He then proceeded to convert it to mathematical form, and then to solve it… And then he was done.17

But how did he know it would work?18

He began to test it on basic statements with basic answers: “What is the greatest source of energy for this planet?”19

”The sun.”20

”What is the name of the art of numerals and equations?”21

”Mathematics.”22

Every answer was correct! He’d found it. At long last, he’d found it. And he would keep it. No one else could know, for they would undoubtedly use it for personal gain. 23

He dug through his papers until he found it again. He took out his camera, took a picture, and began to work on another equation. He would send it far into the future, when man would be less evil. There was a light as he laid down his pencil, the equation finished.24

The picture slowly fell through time and space… 25

Not long ago, or at least not long ago by the measure of time the picture fell through, a man had at last discovered the answers.26