"Has the train ever broken down before?" Harry asked Hermione.1
"I've never read anything about it, but it is possible I guess. But I can't imagine it happening this early and this long. We're only half way along!"2
"We're only half way along? I thought you'd be mad about it being 6 o'clock in the morning and that we're still on the train!" Ron yelled back angrily.3
"Well, atleast that means one more day with out Snape" Harry suggested.4
"Don't be so sure..."5
"Hermione, we're on the train still!" Hermione, who had been looking out in the hallway came back in.6
"The teachers are here." Harry and Ron exchanged looks and Ron stuck his head outside the comparment. He was rather pale when he came back in, so Harry stuck his head outside to check why.7
There, right outside of the compartment, was Snape and McGonagall talking to Dumbledore.8
Harry came back in and quietly closed the door. 9
"Great, Snape on the train, we haven't escaped him. Just what I need on my few should be Snape-less hours" Hermione rolled her eyes and leaned back in her chair. 10
A voice came over the train like someone was talking on an intercom, "Somehow, the train has broken down, as you can all see. While we try and figure out this problem, your classes will be held here. I have quickly whipped up a an extenstion to the train with much larger compartments in which you will go to for classes. We will be handing out your schedules and where to go, momentarily." The Dumbledores voice cut off and Ron slumped into his chair. 11
"Classes on the train!"12
"I personally think it's a great thing, we need to have classes, they're very important! This is our 6th year! We need to be taught, we have to prepare for our NEWTS!" The compartment door slid open and McGonagall was standing there with a stack of papers in her hand.13
"Are you going to take these or am I going to have to wait here all day?" Hermione stuck out her hand and took the three schedules and passed them out to the boys after she glanced over them, "Your day is snap-less today anyways!" 14
Harry looked down and saw that she was correct. He had that man McGonagall first though, it was in the second back comparment.15
Harry and Ron stood up and slid through the crowd to their class. These comparments were huge and obviously magical. They had several chairs stuck to the ground, and the three of them took one.16
They were close the the last ones there, but they still managed to get good seats, in the back. 17
"Now! As we aren't sure how much time it will take for this train to get moving, we might as well get started. Today, we will be doing conguring spells. Wands out, I would like you to try to start with something simple. Please try and conjure a glass. Off you go!"18
Harry and Ron started to try, but before they could flick their wands Hermione already had a full sized silvery-glass goblet sitting in front of her. Ron just rolled his eyes and flicked his wand at the table, which nearly set on fire.19
"What do you reckon happened to the train?" Harry asked.20
"I don't know, but if it's not moving by now, then I think it must be serious." Harry nodded weakly. He had one thing on his mind, but couldn't say it outloud.21
"I don't think it has anything to do with V-Voldemort," Hermione whispered so only Harry could hear her." She glanced at Ron and lowered her voice even more, but Harry could no longer hear what she was saying. He couldn't see why she would try to hide it from Ron though, he was their friend after all.22
Harry had just opened his mouth to ask when the train started moving, and cheers went across the compartments.23
Ron turned sickenly green, and Hermione leaned her head down, but Harry hand't a clue what was going on. Hermione stare at Ron, and he turned white. 24
Harry yelled loudly.25
"Harry, shut up!"26
"WHAT DID YOU DO TO RON!"27
"What do you mean?"28
"WELL HE"S DISAPPEARED HASN"T HE?" Harry closed his eyes hard and looked back at the spot where Ron had been, but then saw that Ron was sitting right next to him.29
"Harry, I'm right here mate,"30
"Yeah, right...."31
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Good job.


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Yeah, well I was starting to write it, then my brother wanted to get on, so I had to finish it really quickly and didn't have time to look over it.
Anyways, thanks! -
First of all, I want to thank you for entering my contest. And sorry for the delay in judging it, life took over, and so did finals.
Anyways, here goes my reveiw. I am warning you (as I'll warn everyone) that I am going to be brutally honest in all my reveiws. But please, take them as constructive criticism and not as flames.
Okay, interesting, interesting story. I don't know if I got everything in it, but this was certainly very interesting. I like the premise in it a LOT!
Just as a little hint, maybe you should do some grammar checks. Cause a few sentences in here were awkward and have the potential of being so much better and easier to read. The same goes with spelling mistakes. There were a few amusing typos in this piece that really made me laugh.
"that man McGonagall" being one. So was "The Dumbledores voice" that one made me giggle.
Erm, Harry seemed a bit more jumpy than he usually is. I don't know if that was me, but he and Ron seemed a bit out of character.
Again, I don't think I got the ending, but I really like the premise. It's nice and unusual.
Thanks for entering my contest!
-Katerina Ivanovna -
I think that was a little rushed, but I think that it was good. It's interesting how the train broke down, which I've never really heard of or seen before, and I think that you should re-write this after the contest maybe, and do a little more with it, I'll be waiting, and I will defenitly read it, and then comment again.
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Interesting.Fanfic is always fun. This story was way deep.lol
1 - 5 of 5
