The Dovecot

“A dovecote.”  Kate’s slight frame hunched over the kitchen sink in front of the large picture window, which overlooked her long beautifully tended back garden.  An undersized sloping black and white cat entwined itself into perpetual motion about her feet as she carefully rinsed a plate and waited for her husband’s reaction.1

“A dovecote?” Bernie repeated.2

“Yes,” she sunk her hands into the warm soapy water.3

“What ye’ want…” he raised his craggy face from the Northern Echo in puzzlement, “with a dovecote?”4

“I spend a lot of time right here,” she paused and turned her head to him, “an’ ye’ know, it’s not my favourite place to be.” She turned back to the sink, waved a soapy hand at the window, the early evening was just beginning to fade the colours of her little bit of paradise, and she wistfully continued, “I’d like to look out an’ watch white turtle doves tumblin’ about the garden.”5

“Wouldn’t ye’ rather have a dishwasher?”6

Kate spun round, her arms flailing and suds flew across the floor; the cat flap clattered as the cat disappeared through it in alarm.  Kate glared as she pointed a soapy finger at Bernie and spoke in slow offence, “You want to give your wife, of 46 years, for her 65th birthday! a home appliance?”7

“Ok, ok,” Bernie held his hands up in submission. His wrinkled face settled with relief as he paused to count the chimes of the kitchen clock, “Right,” he groaned on the seventh chime and eased himself up from his chair, “I’m off to the club then.”8

Kate watched her husbands waddling walk as he went down the long garden path to the slatted back gate, which snapped viciously shut behind him.  She shook her head and grumbled, “that gate’s goin’ a take someone’s hand off.”  9

Last winter the gate had banged all night in the wind, the next night Bernie went to the club, as he did without fail every night, and came back with a large black spring.  It sat, offending Kate on the kitchen counter for a month before Bernie had finally given in to her protests and fetched Dennis from the club.  Dennis compulsively passed his ever-present discoloured and twisted rollup from cupped hand to damp lips and back again, as he fitted the spring to the boisterous gate.10

At twenty-five minutes to midnight, as Bernie had come to expect, Kate was in the kitchen filling the kettle with water.  The tell tale snap of the garden gate told her Bernie was on his slow walk up the garden path; she flicked on the kettle and put two tea bags into the teapot.  11

The heady tang of beer and cigarettes that had followed Bernie home from the club came with him into the kitchen.  He sat heavily down on one of the kitchen chairs and announced, as if he had just returned from complicated and thorny negotiations, “Well, I’ve got ye’ your dovecote.”12

“Ye’ have,” Kate beamed. 13

“Dennis is bringin’ it round on Saturday, with four fantailed doves.”  Bernie raised a hand as if to halt any argument and added quickly, “I know they’re not turtle doves, Dennis says these a’ prettier.”  Then he turned back to his Echo as though he’d been sitting there all evening.14

“It’s not my birthday for three weeks.”  The kettle bubbled suddenly and clicked off. “Can’t he keep them till then?” Kate filled the teapot with boiling water and with a spoon mashed the teabags in the pot.  She leaned across and squeezed Bernie’s shoulder affectionately. “Otherwise, I’ll have nothin’ special on my birthday.”15

“Dennis said that they have to kind of acclimatize, ye’ve got to keep them locked up in the dovecote for a few weeks and feed them regular, so they learn it’s us who feed them and they won’t fly away.”16

“Oh, we can have a garden party and have a letting’ the doves out ceremony!” Kate was delighted. “Ooo, I can’t wait.”17

*18

“Mam!” Tina called as she came in the back door to the kitchen; she stretched her back and as she rubbed her large rounded stomach she felt the baby kick, “It’s only us.”19

Following Tina into the kitchen were her two dark haired children, the first was River a sullen 8-year-old boy holding a red leather football, behind him was Skye a floppy haired 3-year-old girl.  The boy bounced the ball hard on the floor.20

“River!” screamed his mother.  River bounced the ball again and slumped into one of the chairs.  Tina glared at her son, “Take Skye out and play with her.”21

“No way,” moaned River, “this is my Manu ball! An’ she ain’t touchin’ it.”22

“I wanna play with it!” whined Skye, her fists clenched at her side, “I wanna play with it!”23

“Out! Both of ye’, an’ stay away from that gate.”24

As Kate came into the room, Tina shut the kitchen door behind her children and then lowered herself into a chair.  She opened her handbag and passed a small wrinkled gift-wrapped pink package to her mother.  “Just look at that Mam!”25

“What is it?”26

“It’s a present for the baby from Gary’s Gran,” Tina frowned at her mother and as if it was a dare, urged her, “Go on, take a look.”27

Kate opened the package carefully and took out a knobbly red rubber rattle.28

“Have a good look.”29

“Aw, she’s left the price on” Kate went to pass the rattle back.30

“No!” said Tina through gritted teeth, “have a really good look at that price label”. 31

Kate read it aloud, “one pound seventy nine pence, McCoombs Pet Stores.” Kate grimaced.32

“What chance do any of my kids have an’,” and with an exaggerated look down at her belly, cried, “Why I should I wan’ another!” and then pointed at the rattle, “With genes like those!”33

“Oh, Tina that’s a bit rough.”34

“No it ain’t,” Tina took at deep breath, “what about the time his dad took the dog to the doctors instead of the vet. I mean that’s bad enough, but his dozy brother just sat there with him for nearly two hours until he said somethin’.” Tina waved her arms in exasperation, “He even gave the patients name as Rocky Wilson!”35

Kate started to laugh, then stopped herself and decided a change in subject was best, “they should be back any minute now, with my dovecote.”36

A squeal of delight came from the garden followed with a manly chorus of “Stay away from the gate!”37

As the two women looked out of the kitchen window, Tina asked warily, “Did he get it from down the club?” Gary followed Bernie and Dennis as they struggled up the garden path with large wooden box, on each side were mesh covered small archways.38

“Hmm.” Kate shrugged, opened the kitchen door and shouted, “put it on the patio, then I can sweep round it.”39

“Do you remember when Dad brought Gary home from the club?”40

“Hmm.”41

“That was the first time I met Gary.” Tina hinted.42

“Eee, he was such as shy lad.”43

“No mum,” Tina rolled her eyes, “he just never has anythin’ to say.”  44

Click, click, click.  45

Tina turned to watch the sloping cat cross the kitchen, its deformed claws tapped on the laminate floor; it sat down hunched and looked up at them blankly.  “And take a good look at Whisky, Mam.”  46

They stared down at the stooped cat, its front legs were stunted, a good third shorter than they should be and the claws on each of the front paws were fused together into pale hooks.  “Ye’ remember where Dad got her from, don’t ye’?”47

Kate silently turned back to the window.  48

After the box, they brought a green felted roof and a tall chunky stand with four feet.  The children and the women watched as Bernie and Dennis, with his damp limp rollup hanging loosely from his lips, as they struggled to fix together the structure and raise it, while Gary circled them aimlessly.49

When they had finished Kate went out to inspect it, “Ooo, isn’t it marvellous!” she cooed.50

“Right,” announced Bernie, “Dennis ye’d better get the birds since the Dovecote’s been approved.”51

Gary mutely followed Dennis out of the garden, within minutes they were back with a small basket, which Dennis held up triumphantly in one hand while in the other he cupped a smoking rollup.  He set the basket down on the lawn and opened it, stuck his rollup between his lips and holding a wriggling white bird carefully in two hands showed it to Kate.52

“Ooo, isn’t it lovely.”53

“Go on,” Dennis urged while taking a quick puff of his rollup, he blew a wisp of sickly sweet grey smoke out of the corner of his mouth, “have a stroke.”54

“Oh no,” Kate pulled her fists to her chest and grimaced, “I couldn’t touch one.”55

“Fetch the ladders Gary,” Bernie ordered, “better get them in their new home.”56

Carefully, one by one, the doves were placed in their new home and everyone stood quietly listening to the birds as they fluttered and settled in the dovecote.57

Bernie put his arm around Kate and said, “After a cup of tea we’ll nip out to McCoombs and buy the best feed there is.”58

“Bloody McCoombs!” snapped Tina and stormed into the house.59

“What’s all that about?” Bernie asked.60

“Oh nothin’” shrugged Kate as she glanced at Gary who seemed unaffected by Tina’s outburst.61

For three weeks, Whisky made herself comfortable in the bedroom window and watched Bernie carefully climb the ladder and feed the doves, while Kate planned her birthday garden party.62

On the morning of her birthday, Kate opened the bedroom curtains and was delighted; the sky was as blue glass faded to white at the edges, “ooo look at the sky, it’s really blue, just like those old pictures. I couldn’t of wished for better.”  63

By three o’clock, the garden and kitchen was full of family and friends and the party was in full throng.64

It was almost four o’clock, and Tina and Kate where sat side by side on the garden bench while the party bubbled happily around them, when Bernie banged on a saucepan and announced it was time to let out the doves.65

Kate turned to Tina and squeezed her arm, “I feel just like one of those people on the TV, ye’ know, the one with Alan Titmarch.”66

Gary leant the ladders up against the dovecote and Bernie unceremoniously climbed up and ripped off the mesh covering one of the exit’s with a small outside perch.  The crowd murmured with expectation as the birds fluttered within the dovecote, gradually, they silenced and the doves settled inside again.67

“Nowts happenin’” grumbled River.68

“Give it a bang on the side, Bernie!” shouted Dennis, dropping ash all down the front of his shirt.69

Bernie gave the wooden birdhouse a couple of hard thuds and the birds fluttered worriedly and settled again.70

“Stupid birds!” shouted River and bounced his ball hard against the side of the dovecote.71

Quickly, one after another, the doves flew from the dovecote; everyone laughed and cheered.  The white birds briefly twirled against the bright blue sky above the garden and then they swiftly became smaller and smaller as they flew away into the distance.72

“Where the birds go Nana?” asked Skye.73

“Home I should think,” grumbled Kate and rose from the garden bench.74

Tina’s laugh caught in her throat, her eyes widened, she wrapped her arms around her enormous stomach as her waters burst.  She groaned, “Get Gary, it’s started!”75

“Urgh!” hollered Skye, “me Mams wet herself!”76

As Kate followed Tina and Gary from the garden she turned to Bernie and snapped, “An’ do somethin’ about that gate!”77

It was one o’clock in the morning when Kate swung open the gate and walked up the garden path, the light from the kitchen window and a new granddaughter lit her way.  When she quietly entered the house, Bernie and a drooping headed River where sitting at the kitchen table playing draughts.  Kate, on automatic pilot, checked the kettle; the orange ball was half way up inside the clear plastic gauge and she ran her hand over the still warm white plastic jug.  She flicked the kettle back on.78

“Come on son, time for bed,” Bernie scruffed River’s hair, “give ye’ nana a kiss goodnight.”79

River slowly got up and fell floppy-armed against Kate as she kissed the top of his head.  With his ball tucked under his arm, he sleepily dragged his feet as he left the kitchen.80

“Seven pounds 3 ounces.” Kate put two teabags into the pot, “born at 11.50. Tina’s hasn’t a name for her yet, though she’s keen on Ocean.  Where she gets these names from I don’t know.” She shook her head as the kettle quickly bubbled and turned off, “Still she’s the best birthday present I’ve ever had.”81

“Talkin’ of birthday presents,” Bernie started to stack the draughts counters up, “Dennis felt so bad about ye’ fantailed doves he brought some more round tonight.  Not fantailed mind ye’.  Couldn’t get them at such short notice.” He put the counters into the box and folded up the black and white checked board.  “An’ we fixed the gate; it’s got a bolt now.”82

“The gate?”83

“Ye’ didn’t notice did ye’?”84

Kate shook her head as she filled the teapot with boiling water, “the doves will just fly away again Bernie, best get Dennis to come and get them tomorrow.”85

“No, it’s ok these ‘uns have had their wings clipped, they won’t be goin’ nowhere but our garden.”86

Kate smiled as she put the cups on the table and sat down.  “Nowhere but our garden.”87

“The kids are lookin’ forward to it, this time when we let them out it’ll be just family,” then added as though he’d just remembered, “an’ the new baby an all.”88

Whisky kept her vigil from the bedroom window as though nothing had changed and Kate spent more time at Tina’s with the new baby.  It was nearly four weeks later, early in the evening on a warm and sunny Friday when the family all gathered in the garden.89

“Have ye’ made ye’ mind up on the baby’s name yet Tina?” asked Kate as she rocked the baby in her arms.90

“Not really,” Tina sat down on the garden bench next to her Mum, “we’re still callin’ her baby,”91

“What about you Gary?”92

“Baby” he shrugged.93

“I think we should call her Darlington,” said River, “like Becks called Brooklyn, after Brooklyn.”94

“That’s stupid,” laughed Skye.95

“Well ye’ named after Sky and I’m named after… well River,” River shoved his sister, “so what does that make us?” 96

“Can’t keep calling her Baby,” Bernie laughed, “can ye’ imagine it when she’s River’s age, she’d be tortured somethin’ awful and she’d only blame ye’.”97

“I’m not havin’ nothin’ ordinary!” Tina snapped stubbornly, waving her arms in exasperation.  Bernie shrugged chastised.  Guiltily, Tina got up and put her arm through her Dad’s, kissed him on his rough cheek and as Bernie gave a tight lipped smile she added cheerfully, “Now are ye’ lettin’ these Doves out or not?”98

Whisky watched from the open bedroom window as Gary leant the ladders up against the dovecote and Bernie quickly climbed them, unhooking one of the wire meshes covering an exit.99

One Dove, without any encouragement, fluttered out and landed on the lawn.  Skye clapped her hands in delight and slowly with knees bent and arms outstretched she went in circles as she tried to catch it.100

“Skye!” called her Mum laughingly, “Don’t ye’ go scarin’ them away.”101

One by one, three more birds fluttered down onto the closely cropped lawn and they all cooed happily, as they milled about.  It was as if they seemed to check each other out, as though they were counting that everyone was there.  With the head count done, they began to march hurriedly in single file down the garden path. River followed.102

One by one, the doves waddled through the gap in the slatted back gate.  103

Frowning, River opened the gate and watched the birds continue their single file march down the back lane.104

“They’re at the end of the lane now Nana!” shouted River and started to laugh.105

“Av these gone home too Nana?” asked a bewildered Skye.106

Tina sat down next to Kate, took the baby from her grim-faced Mum and laughed,  “Well I’ve got a name for you!” she said to the baby as she kissed her on her nose, “we’re goin’ to call ye’ Dove,” Tina laughed, “an’ then at least ye’ Nana will have one left to remember her birthday.”107

Kate glowered at Bernie, who said, “well, I’ll put the kettle on then an’ we’ll all have a cup of tea.”108

“No!” growled Kate, “I will” she stood up and without another glance at Bernie went into the kitchen.109

Bernie cocked his head and silently gestured they should all follow her into the house.  110

The kitchen door stood open and as their laughter and chatter carried into the garden, Whisky leapt from the bedroom window onto the roof of the dovecote.  In one quick movement, she leant over the side, twisted her tiny body into the dovecote and sat down to wait.111