Diary of a teenage prostitute part 2

Around the time I turned 11 I met Joel and Fran. They were a young couple who lived in the back of the trailer court.My best friend Andrea and I used to hang out there all the time and babysit for them and stuff. We would stay the night, go camping, go to the lake or whatever. My friends boyfriend, J.D. also hung out there. Everyone always had a crush on him including myself. I loved my best friend though and I would never have thought I had a chance anyway.I learned alot of things that year, about being grown up. 1

It started out innocent, like playing kissing games, me, Joel, Fran and J.D. But then we started playing strip poker, or if you lost you had to kiss someones pecker. I felt wierd about it because when Fran wasn't around Joel would act innapropriate to us girls, but I didn't feel weird about J.D. That was soon to change.I was friends with his little sister too, I was a bit younger than him. So we would hang out at night and play tag and hide and seek. Well, on one of these occasions somehow me and J.D. ended up playing alone. I had that weird feeling in my stomach, but I ignored it. I think I should explain the wierd feeling , because unless you've been molested or around a sicko, you might not know what I mean. I was molested twice by this time in the auto, but I am not ready to fill those parts in yet. Once you've sensed it you can always tell somehow if someones not right.2

Anyway sorry to get off track. I knew something bad was going to happen but I just ignored myself. Sure enough he caught me in between two trailers.He threw me on the ground and sat on my arms, you know how someone might sit on your chest and put their knees on your forearms. Then he moved down and tried to hold both my arms with one hand and undo my pants with the other. I started screaming and he told me to shut up, but I knew that if I kept screaming someone was bound to hear me. He knew too so he let me up and I ran home.I never told anyone but my best friend and she didn't believe me. The sad thing is two girls a couple of years younger than me said it too and no one believed them.3

It gets even worse after that. I got in a huge fight with Andrea and we were nener friends again. Then I wen't to the lake with Joel, Fran, their kids, and J.D. It's crazy how I just went on like nothing had hapend. Hind sights 20/20 so thay say. To my credit please keep in mind I am only eleven at this time, though I admit not an average eleven year old. Anyway, we went to the lake and swam for a while and J.D. was pushing all up on me, feeling on me in the water. I admit I liked the attention because I was always a nerd and overweight. I had a lazy eye and had to wear a patch at one time, I always wore hand me downs, a complete nerd. Needless to say, we ended up leaving the water and I lost my virginity to my friend who tried to rape me in the pine trees at Lake Lansing. Well, I was close to twelve then and after that is a whole 'nother part. 4

Well, where was I. 12 years old was a rough age for me, if you can imagine things getting any worse. There are some good parts to my life but with my ADD I can only concentrate on one aspect at a time. I will add them in later.5

A lot of things happend that year. I met David and Katrina, started smoking crack and prostituting, breaking and entering and running away. I did alot of bad, crazy things and I swear that was the longest year of my life.6

I guess things started happening a little before I was 12, I would say it started the spring before I turned 12. I met David and Katrina and stared hanging with them alot that summer. They were very experienced in doing bad things even though they were only a couple years older than me. If I remember right, David was 1 year older and his sister 2 years.7

They were on probation when I met them, I dont think I ever even knew why. They drank all the time and smoked weed, sniffed gas. So of course I started doing all this. Their parents never cared what they did so it was like heaven for a bunch of pre teens wanting to hang out like adults.8

I ended up getting in an argument with my dad due to my recent behavior, and he pushed me on my bed and whacked me with a hanger. I totally deserved it but my friend talked me into calling the cops. He ended up on a years probation with community service. It was kind of a blessing because when my dad got done he kept his job and thats when they quit partying so much, and quit doing coke. But I still felt awful for doing that to him, I guess it was just too little discipline too late for me. 9

When school started things got progressivley worse. My two new friends left school at noon because of their probation, so I went with them. I want to add I turned 12 right before school started because thats really part 4. Anyway, I ended dropping out about 6 months into seventh grade, I found houses to hang out at so it didnt matter about the cold. It's around this time I ran into kim. She was a girl I had known ever since I lived in the trailer court. She was 18 at this time, so when she invited me to go hang out with her I gladly went along.10

She took me out, bought me beer and ciggarettes, and somehow talked me into sleeping with a 50 something year old man for money. You might be wondering what the hell I was thinking, and I'll tell you exactley what.My dream forever was to live on my own, like the boxcar kids. Of course as I got older I had more realistic expectations but I hated living at home. How could they possibly tell me what to do when they were like that. I loved them but I had just grown up super fast and you cant take back time, whats done is done.11

I admit I was scared but I was not a virgin. I can remember everything about it like it was last week. Kim had me smoke a ciggarette, and told me she'd wait. When I was ready, I went in and he had me strip and lay on the bed. He wanted me just to lay there, still, and put my arms above my head. Then he got on his knees, picked up my legs and started to have sex with me. He told me to make kissy lips and he stuck out his tongue like an animal. I still get sick thinking about it.When he was done, I went in the bathroom, cleaned up, went outside and made 60 bucks. Kim made money too but I dont know how much.12

After that, I stayed with her alot. She got me smoking crack and giving her all the money I made from sleeping with old, fat men.I wen't back and hung with all my old friends too, but as you can imagine she didnt want me to go anywhere. My goal had always been independance, and I knew all along Kim was using me. As soon as spring hit I called my mom crying from a payphone. Kims boyfriend felt sorry for me and snuck me out when he was supposed to be watching me. I went home, rested for a day or 2 and it was back on the street.13