Two newly born creatures met each other for the first time. One was a cat and the other a mouse. Both kept looking at each other without blinking. Each was viewing the other with curiosity coupled with fear too. Both had no knowledge of each other’s existence.1
The mouse spoke first, in his squeaky child-voice "Who are you?" 2
"Well, I am a cat", the other creature replied. "I was born little ago and I have ventured out of my house for the first time".3
The mouse also said the same thing. Both were very innocent. And soon they became very good friends. They kept playing for a long time. Both enjoyed themselves very much.4
After playing for a long time, when it was time to bid adieu, the cat asked, "Can we play tomorrow as well?"5
The mouse replied, "I am afraid, we are about to leave for our home town. And I have absolutely no idea when we would return. However, as soon as I am back, I will definitely come and play as now we are good friends". Saying this, the mouse left. 6
Meanwhile one year passed by……7
By the time, the mouse family returned, the little mouse had grown up.8
As a matter of chance, just very next day they met each other after the gap of a year and instinctively both the creatures ran towards each other like two old and true friends , as they had one year ago. 9
As soon as they recognized each other, their conscious alerted them and they froze in their path at once, nostalgically remembering their old friendship. 10
And with in no time, the cat by a virtue of its habit tried to grab hold of the mouse as that was its favorite meal. But at the same time the instinct of the mouse also declared the red alert and with in no time the mouse too was ready to be scurried away to safety , escaping the cat’s clutches.11
And this way alas ...the true friendship that they were gifted by the nature while they were innocents had evaporated, as by now both of them were "wise enough " respectively.12
© Prabhu dayal khattar13
Author notes
The love and friendships are the true and divine gifts of the God and it can not be purchased or developed through and by the means of delebrate attempts ..it requires the innocency and flow of the insticts to love each other without the conditions .
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Very well written my friend. How true your words. Friendship is based on many virtues and can never be bought.
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A really good story as expected from Prabhu Dayal Khattar.While reading it my father was reminded of those days when you hosted a show on DD "SUNO KAHANI PRABHU DAYAL KHATTAR KI ZUBANI."
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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This gave me 'Paws"...lol...
WOW, Prabhu, you are a surprise! This is a lovely story. A moral tale told in a child and adult friendly way. Adults sometimes need reminding of 'values' and you did a nice job of making the adult comparisons clear while leaving the 'innocent' parts as well. I have some suggestions for editing, but I will email them. Truly, a sweet story, with "bite", hee hee. Meow...(I am a cat person) Peace, Rhonda
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Good Write
such a good story with a point of truth to it.we start out innocent in our lives and the ways of the world are taught to us to be truth when in fact they are the wrong teachings.Love one another.Is a good message.
God Bless
~Cheryl~
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I really like this story, and the message behind it. Write more like this, because this story really made my day.
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I love the theme behind this story. Behind the errors and a few awkward phrases, it was perfect. It was perfect because, as you said in the note, friendship is one of those divine gifts of God. It's invaluable.
Good job with this. -
A very nice tale...
Again, as the other have said, it could be longer, with more character developement. But it does what it sets out to do, and was a nice, short read. -
I agree with Sistatroll. It was a good tale, but I would have liked to have seen a little more
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Interesting. If you'd like to revise, I think adding more would help. Since the characters are given human-like qualities, why not develope them a little more? It's cute and parable-like. (I also think most parables need more character developement). Thanks for entering the contest.
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The theme you carry is a topical one to me - just today I discussed the issue in terms of children, potentially born with a perfect brain - and we as parents spend our lives re-programing them to suit our imperfect perceptions... In a perfect world - children, animals and nature as one should be our professors, our instructors, our guru's. Thank you for the thought-provoking write.
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Yes, this applies very well to modern day life, truly insightful and a good way of portraying it so simply and sensitively
Edited on Dec 19, 8:33 because ''. -
So true very true and a perfect fairy tale which can be related to modern day life and love and friendships are built on instincts on the basis of pheromones and dopamines...perhaps...response to the stimuli..a gut feel..a routine monotonous job..were interaction is a must..a Hobson's Choice..a chance meeting..that moment's glance...cheers Shubs
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