Falling

Introduction1

Some people ask me how I still get back on a horse after what happened.  I don't really have an answer, except that when you love something (or someone) you always have the courage to get back up and dust yourself off.  Sometimes that's just an expression; in my case, I really had to get up and dust the loose dirt and grass clippings that stuck to my blue t-shirt off of me.  I am talking about the first time I fell off a horse.  Most of the time, people say that your first fall is the worst.  If my first fall wasn't my worst, I don't really want to know what's in store for me.2

Chapter 13

As I walked into the barn, I heard my footsteps echo one the cold, stone floor of the stable.  I looked around, breathing in the familiar scent of my horses, gazing at the pieces of hay on the ground and the horses munching thaughtfully or taking a nap in their dusty stalls.  It was July, the hottest month of the year(besides August) and everything had a feeling of dead and tiredness.  I went to lay my bag of riding supplies on the ground when I heard Adrienne calling my name from the big paddock, where she was getting her horse.  A large, long, chestnut face suddenly appeared behind her back.  I guessed she would be riding Hank today.  Hank was a large and lanky Irish Sport horse, who found himself tripping most of the time.  He was a funny animal, because whenever he tripped, it seemed like an earthquake was in the arena, the ground around him shaking, as if it couldn't hold his weight much longer.  I waved hi to Adrienne and walked slowly up to the rust gate where she and Hank stood, waiting for me to come.  She told me I could ride Brandy today.  I thought about it.  Brandy was an OK horse, but nothing special; I went inside and got ready to tack up anyway, without any complaint.4

Chapter 25

After getting tacked up, Adrienne and I walked our horses slowly up the big, steep hills to the upper feild.  Once we got up there, we started trotting around the white, wooden fence that surrounded us and showed the boundries of the upper feild.  As I trotted, I felt the breeze upon my face, the sun beating down on me, and Brandy's feelings, saying it would be a relaxing ride.  If only she had been right.6

After a couple rounds of trotwork, we cantered.  Brandy's canter is like a rolling of waves, smooth with the slight fumble of a stride or break in the smooth, seemingly endless back and fourth of the peaceful waves.  We turned a corner and saw Adrienne stop.  I slowly got her back down to a nice, big trot and listened to what Adrienne was saying. 7

Chapter 38

She was saying that we could jump a little if we wanted.  I, being me, of course said yes without any hesitation at all.  Brandy and I started out wtih a little blue plank, only about 9 inches off the ground to get her warmed up.  We trotted calmly up to it, her big, black legs stretched out in front of her.  Only, as we got to the little fence, she ducked out of it; I almost went over without her!  Adrienne said that she does that alot, so don't get discouraged.  I tried again and again, but she kept ducking out to the left or right of the fence, her face determanitedly not looking at it.  Then I decided to canter it.  We picked up her smooth, rolling canter and flew over it, like it was nothing.9

Of course, I should have taken that as a sign not to work her to hard, but i was having too much fun cantering over little jumps.  After our warmup, we worked over a line of jumps, which she seemed to do fine over.  Every time I canterd, she quietly picked her feet up and did her amazing jump over every single one; but when we trotted, she wouldn't go near it!  10

Chapter 4.11

Since I was having SOOO much fun jumping her, I asked Adrienne if we could gallop.  She looked at me like I was a deranged lunatic.  She then asked if I was sure, knowing my answer already.  "YES!! Of course!!" I told her, with a little squeak(usually by this time she already says no if she doesnt want me too).  She said OK, but keep her really slow, only a handgallop since she's so old.  I agreed and took her to the "galloping corner".12

When I pushed her to a canter, I felt her tense up.  I got off her back and we soared like a bird; we were totally connected, or so I thought.  We turned the first corner, and I saw some grass clippings on the ground.  I thought they looked a little slippery, but I kept going anyway.  as we galloped down the longside, I heard Adrienne call to me to slow her up.  I turned the corner, and suddenly, I wasn't on a horse anymore.13

Chapter 5.14

I felt Brandy slide a little to the right(the way I turned her), and then I was totally parallel to the sky.  I closed my eyes, thinking I was going to die.  When I opened them again, I saw 2 black hooves coming toward my face, and then a black belly coming toward my chest.  I was completely coverd by Brandy's body; I couldn't see anything else.  As the hooves came closer, I screamed.  Then I remember seeing the hoooves and her body miss me by a couple of centimeters.  I closed my eyes, all thought lost.15

The next thing I know,I was coming up off the ground, as if an invisible force pushed me up.  Brandy came up with me, and I saw Adrienne jump off her horse.  After a couple of seconds, I laughed and yelled across the ring that I was ok.  I slowly walked back to her, doing a play-by-play review of the fall in my head.  She asked me if I was ok for a while, and once I convinced her I was, she helped me back on Brandy.  She said that I had to get back on her- it's the best way to start getting over a fall.  I cantered a small circle, and then we headed down to the barn.16

Chapter 6.17

So, after that, I don't remember alot; only that Brandy got a small cut on her leg and that I had to go get Rocky(the barn manager) to clean it.  Adrienne kept asking me if I was ok,and i said I was.  Of course, on the outside, I was ok, but even then, I didn't know how mentally scarred I was.  Until the next time I got on a horse.18

The next time I got on a horse, I suddenly found it hard to do very simple things- canter around the whole ring and do really small circles.  I was very aware of how the horse moved, and how I sat.  The next time I rode outside, I realized how hard it was for me- I kept having flashbacks of my fall.  That's how I really have a scar from that fall.  19

I still am kind of nervous when I do new things and I am always more aware of what can spook a horse.  Other than that, I'm fine when I ride.  Why? That fall really taught me that when you love somehting, you can't give it up if somehting goes wrong.  If you do, you'll never forgive yourself until you do it again.20